I am pregnant 3 1/2 months and naturally went to call my bf well i did and guess who answered the cell phone i was shocked to relaize the woman i was speaking to was his wife I HAD NO IDEA HE WAS MARRIED!!!!I feel heart broken i really love this man i am 19 years old and he is 24 . She told me they have been married for 7 years and to verify this she sent me a copy of the marriage certificate and told me never to call again. What do i do i love him?!!
2006-09-14 08:25:59 · 42 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
She has no idea he got me pregnant neither does he.
2006-09-14 08:34:36 · update #1
you are in love with someone you THOUGHT you knew. you obviously know nothing about this man. get an abortion, learn from this, and move on.
2006-09-14 08:46:37 · answer #1 · answered by HazelEyes 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
The likely hood of him leaving his wife and running to you is very unlikely and then for him to stay with you without doing the same to you is even less likely. Best choice is cut your losses while you can and make sure he pays to help support that child. I'm so sorry you had to go through that while pregnant with his baby and I hope you told the wife that you are pregnant with his baby too.
I went through some hard times with my babies father while I was pregnant and ended up having pre-term labor because of it. It is easier said than done but try to stay calm as possible and don't give him the opportunity to upset you. It is not worth losing that precious child over. My son is now 22 months old and right now he is trying to skateboard while wearing sun glasses on his forehead (they are too big so they won't stay up and he's getting mad). I am not with his father but he does spend time with our son and pay child support and he has now learned how very precious he really is and regrets what he has done. That does not erase the past and it does not fix us. The only thing that does is allow him to be an important part of my son's life. My son deserves that much and much much more. I really wish I could send a pic over this of him balancing on a skateboard with the sun glasses on his forehead. LOL
2006-09-14 08:40:00 · answer #2 · answered by Janet J 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This guy is a DIRT BAG! Right now you need to seek out some counselling to help your emotional recoverery. Truth is all the stress and sadness you are feeling now is also felt by that child you are carrying. Having someone to talk to would really help. Also, check out some support groups for single parents. It will give you an opportunity to get perspective from people in similiar situations. Whatever you do, end whatever relationship you have with this man. Do it for your child. Make sure he pays support, but you do not need him. You can be a great parent without him. You will find someone who will love you, respect you and be honest with you. This is was the wrong man. That child is a blessing however, and you can turn this pain around by devoting your love to yourself and your child. My heart goes out to you. Hang in There.
2006-09-14 08:33:14 · answer #3 · answered by Peace Frog 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Every one can tell you so many things to do but you yourself need to decide what is right. I know it is hard when you fall in love and feel comfortable enough that if a pregnancy came along that you and him could be a family. Sadly he has a family of his own. It will be a hard time in your life but you need to make up your mind about the baby and what are you going to do with your life. You are young and the world is hard and most important bringing a baby into this world is very hard job. Please if you decide to seek child support then go through courts. Your child is gonna depend on you and you do need the financial support from him. I suggest that you inform him to when you are ready because this may be his first child or not but he does have the right to know. If you are afraid then go with a police officer. Best of luck to you in making the best decision for you and may be your baby to come.
2006-09-14 08:52:06 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Call back and leave a message and tell him/her that your pregnant. Why didn't you use a condom?????? Now a child is in all of this mess. Get a DNA test done after the baby is born to prove it's his, if they don't believe you. He will have to pay child support and without proof, your screwed. I feel for this child, not either of you. Your adults, you should have taken precautions for this. Too many children in this world today come from affairs like this and they are the ones who suffer for the rest of their life. Oh, this just makes me sad.
2006-09-14 10:43:07 · answer #5 · answered by older&wiserforit 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
For starters, if he's been lying to you throughout your 'relationship' why would you love him? You may have loved him, but thats over now, I'm sorry.
He's clearly an evil deceitful man.
Now you have some tough decisions to make.....
Do you want to have the child?
Do you want to raise the child?
You should make a couple calls....
first to planned parenthood, to discuss your options...adoption, abortion etc.... You might also get some information on birth control while you're there....
second to a lawyer, to discuss your options...you are probably entitled to child support if you want to raise the child.
third (optionally) to him, to tell him your decisions. Or perhaps you can let the lawyer do this, if he or his wife is abusive get a restraining order quickly.
Dont have a second thought about destroying his marriage, he doesnt deserve it. He brought this on himself and deserves to reap as he has sowed.
2006-09-14 08:58:53 · answer #6 · answered by SillyQuestion 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to relize this will never work between you two. If he is inclined to cheat on a women he has been married to for 7 years why wouldn't he cheat on you as well? Does he know that your pregnant? The best thing to do is move on with your life and be the best mom in the world to your new baby.
2006-09-14 08:29:14 · answer #7 · answered by Jewells 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You get a paternity test ordered so that you have proof he is the father and then you go after him for child support. Don't ever let him back into your life except to address issues dealing with the child. He had no business getting you pregnant. Send her pictures of the sonograms whenever you get them. If she's smart she will kick him out. Anyway, cut him off. Plan to make a life for yourself and your baby without him. He's a creep!
2006-09-14 12:11:03 · answer #8 · answered by AVA 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get an abortion and move on with life, 9/10 he will never leave her for you. And if he loved you the same he would never be married to her still. You and the baby will always be second to him family! You don't want your child to have to go through rejection from him and his wife, who would now be your childs step-mother. Just let it go before too much pain is started. Wish you luck!
2006-09-14 08:31:12 · answer #9 · answered by Blondie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Leave the wife alone. But the man has an obligation to pay child support. Go after him legally. And next time, be more careful about choosing a boyfriend. Your baby will be depending on you. Smarten up!
2006-09-14 08:29:36 · answer #10 · answered by sheeny 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
OMG I'm so sorry to hear that. What a jerk! Just take care of yourself and don't worry about him. After the baby is here sign up for child support. You don't' need a lawyer to do that. I'm sure everything will work out. Enjoy your pregnancy and that baby. Right now that's all it's about . Good Luck and Congrats!
2006-09-14 08:33:44 · answer #11 · answered by aimstir31 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋