My bestfriend???????????????

Question

Went out to party it was my birthday and i woke up with my bestfriends boyfriend. I dont remeber much about what happened that night and to make matters worse i live with her boyfriend , two other guy friends from high school since i have always been a tom boy and her. I am know almost 5 months and starting to show and dont know what to do and this is killing me. I now it has to be his because before this i had not had sex in over a year!We agreed never to tell my best friend of what happened. How do i tell him i am pregnant?

Please do not be mean i am not a ****. my buddy steve saw me naked and i think he might know something .
I dont want to hurt her she told me she thinks he is going to ask her to marry him.
It is driving me crazy!

woke up naked with him on top off me and he remebered what happened the evidence was all over the room.

Answer 1

This is a life changing moment for you. It will be painful to be honest, but you must. The rest of your life after this will hinge upon you feeling good about yourself in this situation. You must first be honest with him, and then her. When to talk to them, do it one on one in both cases. You may lose a friend and you may need to find a new place to live, but you will save your own life.

Answer 2

Wow I would not drink if I didn't remember what happens when you do. How do you know it's his if you don't remember anything? After the baby is born I would want a test done to make sure. You maybe giving the baby a father that may or may not be his. I would test before killing any type of relationship you still have with your best friend. You also may kill the relationship they have together. Is that what you would want if it is not true? First find out your facts. If he is not the father don't say anything. Just keep this between you two. If he is the daddy then all three of you need to sit down and talk! Sorry to here that you are in this situation. Next time be a little bit more responsable, and you will not have to worry about runioning other peoples lives! Sorry to sound like a mother but I am.

Answer 3

I'm so sorry your going through this. You and your bestfriends boyfriend need to be honest with her, and the sooner the better, what are you going to do when your baby ask you about his or her father?You can't keep something that important from your child just because of your friendship, this is when you start to put your baby first no matter what happens, the longer you two wait to tell her the harder its gonna be!!! I would sit her down all 3 of you in the same room and be very appologenic, just tell her the truth, you were both very very drunk, you don't remember much, and for her to PLEASE forgive you. If she's really your best friend, she will forgive you, she may not ever trust you again but she will forgive you. Everyone makes mistakes, but you 3 really need to get this out in the open, and sooner rather than later. Think about your baby, and the fact that your all gonna some how be a part of each others life's, especially if they get married. She may not ever forgive you but theres other friends out there, consider what the baby will go through if you don't ever tell!! I know it was wrong I'm not saying that its okay, but think of all the outcomes. I'm really sorry your going through this. If you ever need someone to talk to IM me sometime [e-mail] or you can E-Mail me!!Good Luck.

Answer 4

Ok, this is a mess. BUT, all can (and will) work out fine!! You gotta start there...and you gotta believe it!!
First of all, I think you need to start preparing to be a mommy. Are you giving any thought to this? Are you ready? You can't hide this much longer honey.
I don't think you are a ****. Things happen...oops! You need to talk to the guy. And all though it will be uncomfortable it has to be done.
Aside from what he says &/or does, you need to be thinking of and planning for you & your baby. There is adoption as an option, or if you keep it you need to start building your network of support NOW. Talk to your family &/or other freinds.
Because there are so many of you living together you likely need to find another place to live. SOON!

I do feel for your freind, this will be a big blow to her. However, you did not do this on purpose! And, on some level this must have been ment to be - at least the baby is.
This is a time for you to be selfish and centered in what you need to do for you, & your baby. That harsh I realize, but this was an accident. Now you have to take care of things.
People have been in worse messes and ended up okay. Be strong & start taking action in what comes next - you are not a victim here.

Answer 5

Look...everyone makes mistakes. But hiding and/or ignoring them won't make them go away, or make them better for that matter. You should tell him, and you should tell your friend. I mean if you keep it a secret of who the father is and you keep the baby, what happens as this child gets older and starts to look like its dad. Don't you think the father and your friend might start to put two and two together and figure it out. Things will be worse in the long run.I won't lie to you or blow sunshine up your ***... it will be dificult and people are going to get hurt...but you will all come out of it alive. Friendships and trust issues are going to change and maybe even end. But you have to think about whats right for this child...it has rights too. Sorry.

Answer 6

First, I'm sorry that you are in this mess. I hate to tell you this but it's probably going to get a lot worse before it gets better. :(
My advice first of all, is to sit him down & tell him. He needs to know that he's gonna be a father & you need to figure out exactly where he stands on it. At almost 5 months, there are decisions, a lot of them hard, that you as the woman are gonna have to make. Sorry darlin', but that kinda stuff usually falls on our shoulders. At this point of the game, you have to do what is best for you & that little baby you're carryin'. Be good to yourself & decide if you really want to raise this child, either with the father or on your own. If you don't, well there are a lot of childless couples out there that would love to have your baby. So don't feel bad or ashamed or guilty. Just make the best decisions you can with the knowledge you have & go from there. It's the best you can do darlin'. As for your best friend....It's probably best if she hears it from you. It's the least you can do, if she is your best friend.
Good luck & I wish you a healthy & happy baby. Take care of yourself. :)

Answer 7

First, I hope after waking to realize you were too drunk to recall what happened, that you have slowed up on the drinking! That's a sorry excuse for a big mistake!
It is only fair to yourself and to that child to tell him. That child will need their dad in their life. Unfortunatly your friend will find out too, but as they say "you made your bed now lay in it" You are going to have to deal with the consequences as they come as you have been for the past 5 months. You should have told him sooner, its more likely to complicate things now. He may be argumentative as to wether or not its his... you just have to step up and tell him. When you do tell him I would have documents from the doctor showing time of conception and the due date.
Good luck and as a parent I hope you make smarter decisions.

Answer 8

I suggest you fess up before they get married... afterwards, I can garuntee it would only be worse. The longer you wait, the harder it's going to be. Just to be 100% sure, get a paternity test. This is a tough one though, either way... you messed up pretty bad and theres no way around it.

Don't be surprised if you lose a few friends over this... especially your best. Put yourself in her shoes and think about how you'd feel if your best friend told you she's pregnant with the baby of the man you wanna marry.

Goodluck, you will DEFINATELY need it.

Answer 9

Tell HER first... she won't die if you tell her the truth.
Anyway, at least you will prevent a bigger disaster this way. Your bestfriend should never marry a CHEATER... or one who cannot control himself when drunk!!

As of you, whether your bestfriend throws you out of her life or not.. you are in your 5th month..... find a solution! Don't cling on that bastard just because he is the father... sit down, talk it over with him..... see what he says - but don't tie yourself to him for life just because of a one-night's mistake. Do you love him at all, or it was just a one-night stand???

Heyhey... good luck! Smile - it does good for the baby.
And don't forget that... single mothers are not that bad..... there must be someone out there who appreciates you, too, or who will appreciate you, anyway.
You might still find the right one, even with a baby on your arm.
Keep the faith.

Answer 10

I think it is safe to say that your friendship is over. Not only did you sleep with her boyfriend and are carrying his child, but you have waited this long to tell her. When you take so long to tell her about your mistake-it only says one thing-if you were not pregnant she would have never known. How can she trust you now? Maybe things would be different if you would have told her from the begining-maybe not but you don't have that option now. You need to first tell him since he is the one that helped bring the child to exist. Then you need to tell your friend. You have to understand that she may never speak to you again and as much as you say you didn't mean to hurt her-you have. Now you have a more important thing to worry about and that is your unborn child.