Ok, I need help wording these sentances please?

Question

For some reason it won't let me ask any more questions on my account so I'm having my sister ask them.
Here goes:

paragraph-sentance one:
"Don't touch Frank untill I get back; if he tries to escape don't give him anything for the next few days. I'm not sure how long I'll be one. When he tries or if he tries, lock him in the basement with no food or water."

peragraph-sentance 2:
"Frank needs to be punished for what he's done. I want his brothere here to watch this."

Man #2: "Isn't Joe's kidnapping enough? Why won't you just leave them both alone?"

finally, peragraph sentance 3:
"That idiot! I'll make him pay! How DARE he try and escape!"

I'm writing a fanfiction novel, so I guess the points will go to the most creative revising, but not sure.

Btw, Sis, thanks for letting me borrow this.

Answer 1

I am assuming your story involves 3 men since you have one leaving and 2 talking.


"Don't do anything with Frank until I get back. I am not sure when that will be. If he tries to escape lock him in the basement with no food or water for a while." The short man turns to look at his two cohorts. He may be the smallest man in the room but the others know he calls the shot.

He stares at the other men who silently nod. The short man turns and walks out the door. The two men left in the house remain silent until they hear the short man's car drive off. The house falls silent broken only by the heavy breathing of the fat man.

"Frank needs to be punished for what he has done. I want his brothers to watch this," grumbles the tall man.

"Isn't Joe's kidnapping enough? Why won't you just leave them both alone," asks the fat man.

Suddenly, there is a noise from upstairs. A noise that reminds them Frank is alone in the room with the short man gone. Both men dart towards the stairs. They burst into a small room. The room is empty except for a small cot. The only light in the room comes from a small window. Much to small for Frank to get through. Or so they thought. The noise they heard had been Frank removing the cover and forcing the window open. The tall man leans out the window, but sees nothing.

"Go search the yard now," yells the tall man. The fat one grumbles but hastens to obey the tall one's order. The tall one leans out the window again searching the trees that border the property.

"How did he get untied. He can not have made it far. Not after a jump from this height. He would have broken his ankle at least."

"That's why I didn't jump," says Frank. He grabs the tall man and slams his head into the metal window frame. The tall man taken completely by surprise crumples unconscious to the floor.

Frank runs down the stairs and out the front door. He looks around and sees...... nothing. No lights from cars driving down the road....nothing. The air is silent except for the sound of crickets chirping gently. He pauses for minute trying to get his bearings. He sees a faint glow in the distance and decides to head that way, hoping to find help. He takes off at a jog when suddenly the fat man steps out from behind one of the trees bordering the property.

"Stop right there Frank."

"Please," begs Frank, "I have heard you two arguing. I know you don't want to be involved in this. Just let me go. You can say you never saw me. I will not go to the cops. I don't even know who you people are!!"

The fat man shakes his head sadly and says, "It's too late for that now."

The tall man barrels out the door and grabs Frank roughly. The tall man slams Frank down on the ground.

"You'll pay for what you did. It's just us now."

I hope this helps. Good Luck with your novel.

Answer 2

Michael Jackson and his teddy bear went to Disney worldwide and he paid for his cost ticket with funds that have been stapled in an envelope. Michael Jackson offered a Teddy bear at Disney worldwide and took the bear to a bar the place he asked for a stapler and paid for the stapler with funds.

Answer 3

I looked at this question the 1st time you asked it.....and I'm sorry but I don't understand what you mean by 'wording these sentences'.

Looks like a good novel is on the way though.

Answer 4

I'm a bit lost as to what you mean, also. If you mean you would like people to help you re-phrase what you have said, I suggest you submit it again, & ask can you have help re-phrasing. (By the way, just being helpful, 's e n t E n c e s' not 's e n t A n c e s'.)