I am 56 his mother is 40. We have both been single parents for a very long time. Her 15 and 17yr olds have accepted me but her "baby" has not. He has been spoiled by his mother and she doesn't see that she is working her for attention. Because of this she feels that she has to chose between her "baby" and me. A choice I would not want to have her make. She is building a wall to sacrifice her happness for that of her child. When she and her children could have both. In order to be able to break through this wall I feel that I have to gain common ground with him.
2006-09-14 01:44:21 · 7 answers · asked by snakemantom 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
take him to a sporting event
2006-09-14 01:46:01 · answer #1 · answered by arizonaprincess2 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This may sound kind of rude and I'm sorry. But have you tried asking this child what it is he would like to do? We're not talking about a 3 year old who only wants to see the Wiggles on TV. An 11 year old has feelings and thoughts and while you say he's spoiled ( he may well be) haveyou tried sitting down and having a talk. Maybe he'd enjoy it if you took him to a ball game or something take the time to get to know each other. I dont know if the father is in the picture but does this child maybe think youre trying to replace his father? Sometimes even the best intentions are misread by a child. His life has changed drasticly over the past few years, you should never let him dictate what the adults can and cant do, but it wouldnt hurt to have a good old fashioned chat with him.
2006-09-14 01:49:54 · answer #2 · answered by skylark455st2 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would talk with him, if possible and just feel out what he likes to do. My son just turned 12 and he loves baseball, of course the video games and scientific things. Depending upon the area, go to an interesting museum, or some place that he has interest in, just the 2 of you, this hopfully will bring you two closer. I applaud you for trying, a lot of men would just give up or have an attitude about it. Good luck and I hope everything works out.
2006-09-14 01:52:59 · answer #3 · answered by cfoxwell99 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I bet he is afraid you're trying to take his mother away , show him your there for them all and want to be there, I bet if you treat him with kindness and love he will come around. A new person in your life takes sometime to get use to . Hang in there!Good Luck!
Maybe take him to the movies
sporting events
play video games with him
ask him what he is into show interest in that
go out to lunch just you and him
2006-09-14 01:53:45 · answer #4 · answered by lisababyg ♥ 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
11 years old boy,it's not a baby.he knows what he's doing.and it's not good from you to play the rules of the father at once.it seems to me you are putting a rules and regulations for this family.because you're judging that the boy has been spoiled by his mother,and you're trying to correct it.my advise to you is to be the father step by step and at your place I'll try to be the friend not dad.
2006-09-14 02:04:58 · answer #5 · answered by Moe M 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sounds like you need to do things mom and son and you like. 56 is not old. so here are some ideas. Tractor pulls, Camping, Fishing, eat dinner together ALWAYS, and ask what hed like to do. maybe he likes bike riding well ride with him. there is so much you could do that dont cost much money. but it sounds like you should involve him more in the things you do. but you also have to be an adult for him to.
2006-09-14 01:52:39 · answer #6 · answered by sugerglaze28 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
he likes to hav wat his friends hav got
2006-09-14 01:52:53 · answer #7 · answered by Alexander R 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋