I lost my virginity to this person. i was totally in love. Through the whole relationship they told me they were a virgin. Today they confessed they werent. I dont know how to feel. I dont know if i should trust her. Should i?
2006-09-13 15:44:03 · 14 answers · asked by ForgeryOfRomance 1 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
ForgeryOfRomance,
I think that forgiving is first. If you want to forgive, then please do so. I think that you need some communication to understand the lie first, it sounds like it hurt you.
But you probably can tell now, that you can't trust that person. If there was one lie, how many more have you gotten from them? So it's your descision. You will most likely carry this throughout your relationship with this person. It won;t go away. Nothing will erase this violation. You can only carry yourself with dignity through it all.
So remember that you cannot forget. So now do you want more time with someone who basically cheated on you, or are you going to forgive?
The ball is in your court.
2006-09-13 19:22:40 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
When you calm down, ask yourself how much you believe she genuinely cares about you. This isn't to question yourself about how much you want her to care, but how much your guts say she does. If you think she does or are not sure but think maybe, try sitting down with her somewhere that you feel comfortable and ask her to tell you why she lied. Tell her you want the whole truth, warts and all, and that you intend to just listen until she is finished. Once in a while, a person can loose their virginity in a way that they feel ashamed about. If that's her story and you believe it is the honest truth, you might want to give her a very cautious second chance. If she doesn't have a really good reason, then I'd end the relationship. That's just too personal an experience for someone to lie to you about.
2006-09-13 23:25:06 · answer #2 · answered by Alex62 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is a hard one, but I have to advise that most likely you should NOT trust her again. In most circumstances, I believe everyone deserves a second chance. However, life has taught me, if someone lies about the big stuff--they have no problem lying about the small stuff. Trust is a fragile thing--once you break it, it is almost impossible to get it back. Do you really want to stay in a relationship that you always have to wonder if the person is telling you the truth? Constantly checking up on what they say, cuz you have that constant nagging voice in the back of your head that won't let you simply believe them anymore...
2006-09-13 23:04:25 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I wonder what made them want to confess?? It would probably take a lot of selling to get me to trust a person again after they've told me a whopper like that becauswe they manipulated you to get what they wanted which makes me believe that not only are they a liar, but a sneaky, selfish manipulative liar at that. If you have serious feelings for them - just be careful. and take everything they say from now on very lightly... Good luck. I hope only for the best for you!
2006-09-14 00:34:42 · answer #4 · answered by Myzz Undastood 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do u think that she is a good person even had done that horible thing against u??? Would u be able to continue to have a good relationship with her? If u think that is not a good reason to break up with her...just don´t do it...
There are many questions to make for yourself after your decision. Take care.
2006-09-14 16:15:01 · answer #5 · answered by "D" 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
her past was really none of your business. So what if they were not..do you feel like less of a person because there were others??? IF so, you have a serious case of insecurity. Get over it. She had her reasons to be less than honest about this, you should NOT have asked her if she were...so let it go and be happy. IF you have to ask here if you should be angry or whatever, you really have no problems. Good luck
2006-09-13 23:44:28 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
if you think she deserves your trust again, then yes. but i wouldn't because it was a pretty heavy and cruel lie.
she was probably just using you if she did such a shallow thing. who knows. take care and try to learn from this hardship.
2006-09-13 23:11:15 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wouldn't trust her if she lied about something that important
2006-09-13 23:47:17 · answer #8 · answered by LeeLee 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Never trust anyone! Trust is for fools.
2006-09-13 22:59:37 · answer #9 · answered by ne0aes0p 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
no dont believe her apparently she wanted to take ur virginity away thats wut i would think so u shouldnt give her a chanve , try not to be so naive i mean that how i look at life cause i really dont want to get hurt
2006-09-13 22:50:35 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋