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i have low self esteem i feel lost, brokenheart, like nothing, also i don,t know who to turn to for help.

2006-09-13 04:01:27 · 19 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships Other - Family & Relationships

i deal with a breakup with my boyfriend

2006-09-13 04:21:23 · update #1

19 answers

In a situation like this, the only one you can turn to who will ALWAYS be there for there you, is yourself. You have somewhat of a long road ahead, but it can and will get much better. I was in a verbally abusive and occasionally physically abusive relationship for four years, the end of which I was left with feelings similar to those described in your question. You say this break-up is a nasty one and judging from your feelings, I suspect he or she was verbally abusive. Maybe he isolated you from your friends and family, so you feel like you have noone. Or told you you were ugly, lucky to have him and that noone else would want you. He has probably invested a lot time and effort to break you down, and would like nothing more than to see you fall flat... Honey, the best revenge is success! Go buy a new outfit, get your hair done, excercize, go out and SMILE...You may have imagined him finally realizing his mistake, and becoming that person he was when he was good to you. You may be hoping comes back, and if I'm right about this verbal abuse, he might. Two things stand foremost in my mind... both words from the two women I admire most:

"He is being nice to you now, only so he can be mean to you later." -My Mother.
And...
"It is better to be alone than to wish that you were." -My Grandmother.

My ex was constantly breaking up with me so he could be with someone else, and then crawling back to say he would never do it again. We were in a continuous state of breaking up for over a year. One day, I just decided not to take him back. I'm not saying it's easy, but I finally had enough of the break-up make-up routine, the screaming, the belittleing and I CUT OFF ALL CONTACT. I felt like I was going to die. I felt like I could just crawl out of my skin or under a rock. I was a mess for the first few months, but then I forced myself to excersize, got a second job to stay busy, and bought some new clothes with the money. One day, I looked in the mirror and realized I wasn't fat, or ugly, or stupid. In fact, I looked better than I ever had and realized I was happy all by myself. It took almost three years for the whole process to unfold and I had some really tough times, but I am now in a committed relationship with a man who treats me like his princess.

I wish the same for you.

2006-09-13 05:38:11 · answer #1 · answered by Ralphie da Monkey 3 · 0 0

YOU NEED CHANGE! Go and get your hair colored/highlighted and a cute new cut! By some new clothes. It will help w/esteem. also change your everyday routine. Do something different, I like to go bike riding, or go to the park for a jog or walk, wave and smile at everyone who does it to you. Go out w/a friend. I'm sorry for sadness I really wish I could be more help but, all of the above is what I did and it seemed to help pass time and at the same time the changes I was making was to me progress to a new/fresh start. Good luck sweetie and don't worry, this too shall pass.

2006-09-13 04:09:18 · answer #2 · answered by liljewel 3 · 0 0

Honestly relationships come and goes. You need to learn from the mistakes in this realtionship and make sure they don't happen again. As for your low self esteem. Before any realtionship can work. You have to love yourself. You are a great person and don't let anyone else to you anything else. There are a lot of other people out there so, move on and you will be fine.

2006-09-13 04:06:26 · answer #3 · answered by JUSTME 2 · 0 0

i've got been there, rather everyone has a minimum of as quickly as. it rather is quite complicated once you're depressed with the aid of fact the soreness is a lot extra. don't sense hopeless and that he's the only element which will make you comprehensive lower back. It sounds like that precise now yet comprehend there will be others. If he discovered somebody so directly then he surely had doubts in the process the relationship and replaced into already looking someplace else at an identical time as with you. adult men can try this, have a superb time with you and forget approximately approximately it here day. I went by a similar subject and now that i glance back i'm happy with the aid of fact he placed me by hell and that i'm a more suitable individual for that now. We basically weren't properly matched for one yet another and we grew aside and he did no longer take care of me properly. i replaced into depressing with him even nonetheless I felt so lost without him. It replaced right into a tousled subject. comprehend that the subsequent individual would be lots extra appropriate and could no longer make you sense such as you're no longer helping them. i've got faith such as you should get some help on your melancholy and take time to paintings on your self and do what you prefer to do. Be egocentric. have faith me, he will do an identical with the subsequent female so do no longer provide her or him a 2nd concept. do no longer talk over with him lower back and circulate directly to larger and extra appropriate issues. i'm hoping that enables...

2016-11-07 05:58:22 · answer #4 · answered by sikorski 4 · 0 0

well i would have to have a few more details to make a diagnosis but it sounds like u really cared for this person and now u are lost without them , the best thing to do is to surround urself with ppl that wont remind u of this person and who will be there for u in ur time of need. I understand exactly how u feel b/c i have been through a divorce and my mate cheated on me so I felt all the same things that u are feeling healing takes time dont rush it

2006-09-13 04:05:14 · answer #5 · answered by ? 3 · 0 0

I would suggest to find away to keep your self busy (start a hobby, maybe work on your career or schooling).. do something for your self as well. Seek comfort in friends and family .. and if necessary go2 counseling. I'm sorry that you are having a hard time.. but as time goes by it will get easier

Hugs from a Loving Mom to a Brilliant, as well as beautiful 8 year old Jared and Our Angel, Zachary (taken to soon but who will always remain in our heart) ~ Mel

2006-09-13 04:03:15 · answer #6 · answered by jaredsmommy2004 6 · 1 0

It's never easy, however time heals all wounds. Trust me, I have had my heart broken many times, but have always made it through.

I am lucky to have found and married the woman I love, but it took many years of dissapointment and heartache.

Hang in there, get out, enjoy life, party it up and you'll be tip-top in no time...!

Good luck.

2006-09-13 04:03:45 · answer #7 · answered by KinfOfPly 3 · 0 0

the emotional feeling your experiencing was caused by this man you were dating.. now that you are no longer dating him... its time to move on... find someone who will lift your esteem... boost your spirit ... give you what you deserve... by treating someone nasty is only due to the fact this man was hurting you before you could hurt him... very typical... ask anyone who cares for you for help......

2006-09-13 04:11:01 · answer #8 · answered by ﺸÐïåMóñdÐôññåﺸ 5 · 0 0

Do you have a close friend or other who you can talk to? You need a support person/people......everyone does at least one time in their lifetime. You have worth......tell yourself that. Been there...done it.....takes a little work sometimes...but you are someone!

2006-09-13 04:03:24 · answer #9 · answered by nindag30 2 · 0 0

I know how you feel. Been there and done it. The only thing you can do is to keep putting one foot in front of the other.

2006-09-13 04:03:59 · answer #10 · answered by synchronicity915 6 · 0 0

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