I'm just so unhappy because I feel so incomplete. I went to bed crying and woke up crying aswell. I know that's not normal for a 15 year old is it? I have problems [like my hands shake alot wen I'm nervous or something like that] and I try to talk to my mom about them, she always shuns them away as if by doing that can magically make them dissapear. I want help, but she won't let me get it. I can't talk to my dad, he's too old to understand anything now. Both my older sisters are getting to become like my mom, and I have no close 'mentor' like friends that can help me out like that. The only person I can talk to is God. And I pray and pray, and I'm not saying I'm impatient.....And there's there's a guy who I've liked since 8th grade and I don't know why cuz he's brought me so much more pain than happiness. I pray about that too. But I don't wanna be on Y.A.'s my whole life asking for help...how do I get it? I know I need it.
2006-09-13 02:28:14 · 25 answers · asked by K 3 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Adolescent
Its normal to have all sorts of emotional delemas and crisis in your life as a teenage girl. Its also much more common for teenage girls to be nervous in social settings, especially in todays society that puts so much pressure on being perfect.
In all honesty you are very typical for your age, your problem is that you've gotten so caught up in your emotions that you've been run away with them. Its very easy to lose sight of reality when under pressure from school, friends, family, and hormones (which is really what causes most of these emotional melt downs).
Ive been there before, and most teenage girls have been too. What you have to do it regain your focus and breathe a little.
Your life cannot be as horrible as you think it is. Its quite normal for older siblings to grow more and more like their parents as time goes on, in time you'll find yourself doing the same. Its perfectly normal. Besides that, theyre older than you, and in most natural settings they want to be above where you are, and not look back on it so readily. Its a very unfair feeling for you, but its also part of life. You can either make yourself miserable over it, or you can accept it and move on.
As far as with parents, remember that theyre people too. They didnt go to school to learn how to raise a house full of teenage girls. That have no idea what theyre doing, its totally a fly by the seat of your pants situation to raise kids. Its scary, its hard, and its 24/7 never ending. Parents live with a lot of fear about screwing up their kids, or not being able to provide them with what they need to be functional. They either learn with the first children how to deal with each stage, or they become overhwelmed and just bow out. And sometimes, parents do know best, and not addressing some issues is better than making nothing into something. So dont be so quick to assume your mom is avoiding the problem. You can communicate with her as much as you can, and see where that takes you.
As far as boys go, God knows exactly who he made you for, and often enough we dont know who that is as children, and it often isnt who we imagine. So pray less about the boy you like, and more about becoming the person God needs you to be for your future husband. You'll find that person soon enough. But you're going to want to make sure you know how to handle yourself and a relationship.
As far as your dad being too old, I dont care if he's 70, he's your dad and as clueless as he might be he's not retarded. You need to have a relationship with him, and no matter how old you get your tears and suffering will always move him. You need to make sure you have a voice that he hears.
So, all of that to say, pull yourself up by your boot straps, stop feeling sorry for yourself and go function in society.
There are many many people who are VERY much less fortunate than yourself. Kids, parents, teenagers, old people. There are many suffering people out there who need you in their lives to some how pull through. So long as you have breath and self pitty then that means you have work to do. Because when you're doing that work, and helping other, and being a friend to the friendless, you'll find that you have what you need to be confident and happy.
2006-09-13 02:49:22 · answer #1 · answered by amosunknown 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I would like to start by saying that a lot of teens feel the same way as you do, and there are alternatives! Do you have a councilor at school? Try talking to him/her! But most important, you are somebody just like everyone else and you need to realize that life is what you make it! Don't be so hard on yourself! Praying is a great way to ease your soul and help yourself find peace throughout life! 15 is a hard age sweetie, it seems that in this point of life nobody can possibly understand how you feel! Things do get better! The guy you speak of that just gives extra heartache, Ignore him! Keep your distance and forget about him! You don't need the extra disappointments in life! Your sisters are only following what they see! Don't take it out on them and try talking to your mom and let her know your plans, either she sit down and hear your feelings or your going to speak with a school councilor tomorrow! Maybe she will at last know how important it is to you for her to hear you out and help you find a way to deal with your problems instead of feeling terrible about everything all the time! Good Luck Sweetie!
2006-09-13 02:53:00 · answer #2 · answered by shelly_mo67 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is normal for a 15 year old to feel lost and incomplete... we all do at that age and our emotions are running wild due to new hormones etc. I know exactly how you feel and it is very hard to have someone to talk to.... I suggest you keep praying if it helps and also I found it very therapeutic at that age to write down my feelings in the form of poetry, story or a diary. It is really hard without a mentor or confidant, but at your age it feels like no one can possibly understand what you are going through and indeed your mother and sisters may have forgotten what it was like when they were your age and are brushing you off. There are people you can talk to besides them, I suggest you talk to your school counselor if you have one or maybe call a free hot-line like... Children First Mentor Hotline, 1-800-914-2212 or maybe go to this site for more info and advice... http://www.teenadviceonline.org/gethelp/
Anyway don't get too down about it, trust me things will get better as you get older and I really hope you feel better soon!
2006-09-13 02:51:33 · answer #3 · answered by Kelly + Eternal Universal Energy 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The best thing you could do is find a church nearby were the people love others like christians should....sometimes you have to look for a couple before you find one of those, unfortunately. But if they are truly following Christ, then they will love you too, and help you in anyway they can. Talk to the youth pastor and get involved with the youth group at the church. If you pray about that too, God has promised to answer and supply your needs.....the needs He knows you have, not necessarily the ones you think you might have. So be looking for opportunities to make new, POSITIVE friends!
2006-09-13 02:43:01 · answer #4 · answered by Irishgal 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your school should have a school counselor- I would start there. Your counselor may be able to help you through this or may be able to get through to your mother on your behalf. You are not alone and I am glad you have your sisters to rely on. I am glad to see you are looking for help and know you need some guidance. I know many schools now have a mentor program as well- ask your counselor about that too. Good luck- we may only be Y.A. but there is always someone here to at least give you an idea. Just remember to ignore the ones who are rude or stupid or don't have good intentions. Good Luck.
2006-09-13 02:37:08 · answer #5 · answered by therealprinsess 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I know how you feel because I went into depression at 14(I wished I was'nt born,I cried every day all the time,was never happy)but eventually I got through it and I'm as happy as ever.I don't know if your depressed but it sounds like you might be getting there.If your mom won't get you help,then you need to get in touch with child services and they will for sure help you but this is only if you can't stand it anymore.Also,just keep on praying and always keep God in your life,he will get you through it,it just may take some time.Praying is always the best choice and thats how I got through my depression.I hope everything works out for you,good luck!
2006-09-13 04:42:40 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do you have a teacher you can trust? A grandparent, aunt or uncle? A pastor or someone at your church? A doctor? It will help if you can tell someone who will listen about your problems. Obviously your mother should do that, but someone you can trust will do.
It's not that abnormal to be unhappy at your age, though that won't make things any better quickly. All I can promise you, as a complete stranger on Y!A, is that you'll pull through it and realize that life is, on the whole, pretty good. It takes time to realize that, but trust me. You should try to spend your time doing something that will give you a positive outlook on things - have you thought of volunteering? Nothing raises one's spirits than doing something for someone else who needs you, and who appreciates your help. You could ask if they need volunteers at homeless shelters, nurseries or old folks' accommodation. Seniors can be very rewarding to work with, as they are often very grateful for the smallest act of generosity.
These things won't make your specific problems go away, but they may put them in perspective. It's likely you should consider not wasting your attention on that guy any more. There are a million guys out there who will treat you as you should be treated, those who won't are the ones who deserve to be lonely.
Good luck - try to be patient - find something to occupy you, at weekends perhaps. You will see the difference quicker than you think.
2006-09-13 02:38:01 · answer #7 · answered by Bad Liberal 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I agree with Kelly V. Don't stop praying, continue to seek the Lord. He hears your cries, and He will give you an answer. Ask a friend who's parents are Christians if they can help. I will be praying for you.
God Bless!
2006-09-13 05:20:49 · answer #8 · answered by Tiffany 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I truly understand u, I'm 15 too, and I get depressed sometimes but maybe u have a problem, i mean like a disorder or something so try to talk to a teacher or somebody, but that situation has to change, if u want to talk sometimes, my e-mail is cristyn19_753@hotmail.com, u can always talk to me, well in the morning I'm at school but I'm free in the afternoon, so, I'm here 4 u, sweet heart.
2006-09-13 07:40:08 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
theres alot of pressure and insecurity at ur age...maybe u have anxiety disorder or your suffering from some sort of depression..u can talk to a counselor at your school or a teacher ...forget the guy in 8th grade-hes not helping...but keep seeking help..i dont know whats your families problem but its clear their not dependeble so look for help like i said at your school...and keep praying god will bring you comfort soon enough
2006-09-13 02:34:02 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋