My fiance and I were getting married on oct. We were trying to get pregnant and I just found out I am. When we found out we were so excited, (this happened bout 3 weeks ago)he told the whole world. for the next 2 days we knew we wanted this baby, took my first belly pix, he got a book with baby names. 3 weeks later his parents talked to us bout them being concered bout us getting married so soon, and now the baby and we have the choice of not having the baby. ugh, the nerve!... well after that nite I lost my excited husband to be and father to be, he became different and asked me to think bout not having the baby and set more goals together spend more time together, travel etc. Well it hard for me to describe my pain, I lost my partner, my babys dad, i'm confused i thought bout having an abortion just to make him happy but i relized i wont be happy anymore. I want my fiance back, I told him today i'm keeping the baby and he said hes done with me. Im sad and mad, what do I do???
2006-09-12 20:54:07 · 16 answers · asked by elviaspawz2000 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
I'm so sorry .. and just wanted to send some hugs your way. Right now, you are going to have to focus on yourself and the baby. Your fiance is lacking in maturity apparently and I couldn't imagine how you feel. Seek comfort from friends and family, continue to stay healthy and try not to stress for the baby's well being. As well, make sure he is fully aware that he can have the single life but he will have responsibilities to attend to when the baby is born.. especially in child support.
Hugs from a Loving Mom to a Brilliant, as well as beautiful 8 year old Jared and Our Angel, Zachary (taken to soon but who will always remain in our heart) ~ Mel
2006-09-12 20:59:49 · answer #1 · answered by jaredsmommy2004 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
You did the right thing and don't ever feel quilty for leaving your baby's father. He might just be getting cold feet and he's probably realised what a huge responsibility it is to bring up a child. I am sure once he sees the babyand realises how innocent and vulnerable a baby is, he will realise that your baby will need a dad. I feel so bad for you and I dont even want to imagine how terrible it must be. Just be strong and have peace of mind that you made the right decision. You had two choices: Kill an innocent baby or leave your baby's dad. You made the right choice. You would never want on your conscience that you killed your baby.I dont mean to sound horrible, but if he is so quick to get rid of baby that you created together out of love, he never loved you to begin with. Good luck
2006-09-12 21:08:57 · answer #2 · answered by Jade22 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Get together all the info you can on him (Social Security Number, Driver license number, licence plate number, ect) so you can keep tabs on him and collect child support from him for the next 18 years. Dont' have an abortion. There are people out there that will help you. Try the crisis pregnancy centers. I think adoption is a much better option than abortion, if you feel that you cant take care of it. What an a$$......don't let him off the hook. He needs to take responsibility.
2006-09-12 21:03:20 · answer #3 · answered by zaeli22 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
On one hand you are well within your right to keep the baby, and if thats what you want then do it - and yes, make sure he pays for what hes done to you both emotionally AND financially.
On the other hand - do you really want this mans baby anymore? And do you really want the potential problems with him and his parents? If you keep the baby they will probably make your life miserable. They may even attempt to gain custody of the child later. This would be devastating for you and the child.
Even if you do decide not to have the child, DO NOT get back together with this man, he will always be a mummys boy - his mum & dad will always be little devils on his shoulder.
Be grateful this has happened BEFORE you got married ie "trapped".
Good luck babe, I wish you all the best!!!
2006-09-12 21:20:38 · answer #4 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
The choice is yours it is your body. I get the impression you are quite young and i think that your boyfriends parents have leant on him to make this decision and he is not strong enough to resist them. Get him to speak to you quietly no tears no arguing or recriminations and get him to explain why he has changed his mind. If he does not seem to have an answer ask him, in a positive way, if there was something that his parents said that helped him make this decision. I don`t know what your financial or employment position is but he may be frightened of the responsibility. Whatever happens and if you have the child he will still have a financial responsibility to the child I wish you the very best of luck in whatever you do and would love to get an email letting me know how things go.
2006-09-12 21:23:31 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
he's a jerk..get on with ur life..it's such a pity in ur case..weren't u able to tell if he had a changed feeling for u b4 u guys had sex?(i'm asking friendly)..u have to go on with ur life and keep the baby,take good care of the child and make sure he/she doesn't follow ur footsteps,u wont want ur child to experience the same pain u went thru..
all the best..
hope this helps
2006-09-12 21:03:51 · answer #6 · answered by alexgnot 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
keep the baby
although you love your fiance a lot
it's no worth of getting the baby out and be with your lover
maybe later you'll find some man who loves you and the baby.
don't let your fiance decided the young baby's life... you decided it
2006-09-12 21:15:13 · answer #7 · answered by ~Millie~ 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
keep the baby honey. let the man go, he doesn't love you. maybe it's better that you found out before get married. a child is more important than a man, really. maybe he's influenced by this parents?
2006-09-12 20:59:59 · answer #8 · answered by **** if i know 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Inform him that he will be a lucky winner of court ordered child support payment plan. Tell him if he can't be a MAN about it, maybe he should stop dipping his wick or wear a "raincoat" instead.I think you could do so much better then this dude. Really....
2006-09-12 20:59:35 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Listen to Witch from oz 2003.
2006-09-12 21:09:27 · answer #10 · answered by Jo 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋