My friend husband is sending her through a lot.He don't want her to have any friends,he also don't want her to go any where.Every time she gets on the phone he gets mad and start saying negative things.He also gets mad at her when she goes by her family and start saying negative things and he also say that she is going by her family so that she can be with her other man.He says that her family is helping her cheat on him.They have 3 kids together,one girl and 2 boys.He treats their daughter good which is the oldest and he treats the baby boy good too,but treat the oldest boy different from the other 2.If the oldest son needs a hair cut,she has to bring him to the shop where her brother cuts hair at so her brother can cut his hair.But the thing is that her husband knows how to cut hair.He cuts his own hair every other day but don't cut the oldest son's hair.He needs a hair cut now real bad,he have not had a hair cut in 2 week now but his father's hair is cut.
2006-09-12 16:03:33 · 13 answers · asked by mrs.pierre3 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Wow. From what you have said sounds like your friend is in an abusive relationship. her husband is abusing her. maybe not physically but it is still abuse. Isolating her and controlling her. probably making her feel like she could never make it on her own. and in a case like that it can actually be worse than physically abuse. your friend really needs to find a counselor to talk to, things can only get worse.
2006-09-13 02:17:58 · answer #1 · answered by nikkie_girl_77 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow, sounds like he has some control issues. Also he feels threatened by the oldest son, so he tries to control that too by not paying or cutting the boys hair. You need to be there for your friend she is going to go through some hard times if her husband does not get help with his anger problem.
2006-09-12 16:14:28 · answer #2 · answered by Josie31 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well he certainly have some insecurity issues. Do understand, he probably had some past relationship that ended badly, so don't hate him. I think your friend should probably discuss to his husband about marriage counselling, and if he refuses, try something else, like assure him that what he's thinking is not true at all. If your friend is innocent, she won't have anything to hide and the truth will come out (whether he likes it or not). Don't give up the marriage so quickly, I mean, look at how far they've come... 3 kids now. Tell her not to be another statistic for single parents without trying to save the marriage. Love needs sacrifice.
2006-09-12 17:38:10 · answer #3 · answered by Hanna 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Uhm, two issues here. Her husband is a controller. Controllers work out of fear. The question is...what does he fear? The second issue sounds like there may be an issue in parentage. Is he the son of the father? It sounds like this family needs some counseling. And your friend will need some personal counseling to break free of his control. Chances are, she is enabling it as well.
2006-09-12 16:09:47 · answer #4 · answered by Sad-Dad 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The husband sounds like the boyfriend of a girl I know. She can't do anything with out him getting angry and calling her nasty names. She doesn't go out and she can't even talk on the phone with one of my other friends unless she's at work on her lunch break. Her boyfriend is very controlling and VERY SELFISH. That's what your friend's husband sounds like a very self centered person with low self esteem. He wants to control his wife because he's afraid that she'll leave him for someone who'll treat her better. But it sounds like your friend has low self-esteem too. I'm sure she knew how he was before she married him and now he's putting her though this crap. Tell your friend that she needs to stand up for herself and put that man in his place. She should tell him that she's sick of the way he treats her and that's she's not going to take his crap anymore, and that he needs to treat his son better. She doesn't need to swear at him or threaten him with anything but she should voice her feelings and not be afraid of him.
2006-09-12 17:05:38 · answer #5 · answered by danikatspecial 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, your friend obviously chose to marry this man as well as to have several kids by him. These things don't just happen accidentally - she had to have chosen to do so. If your friend's choices bother you, perhaps you could bring it up with her. There might be another side of the story as to why she loves this man enough to have kids with him and to stay with him in spite of all the seemingly negative traits. I'm sorry to say, but it's her choice, not yours; you can offer your help, but you can't make her do anything she doesn't want to do (i.e., make better choices).
2006-09-12 16:18:44 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your friend needs to prepare herself and her children with a plan to leave. This guy is a controlling freak. It won't stop either, it will only get worse. If you can help her, help her. She is going to need some emotional support through this. If she doesn't get away from him soon, she is going to loose all her self esteem in the end. Fear will control her life. I hope that you can help her get away from him sooner than latter.
2006-09-12 17:24:32 · answer #7 · answered by older&wiserforit 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
maybe he is guilty of something! She needs to be a better parent and divorce him and get the oldest son counceling...... There is 2 sides to every story~
2006-09-12 16:09:35 · answer #8 · answered by Kate R 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She needs to divorce him and enjoy life. He shouldn't treat one kid any better than he does the other one. He's very jealous of her, she don't need that. She needs to find her a good man and that will treat her with respect. Tell her i said Good Luck!
2006-09-12 16:08:20 · answer #9 · answered by BadAssGirlINWV 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The father is a insecure..... person (for lack of a better term). They need to go to counciling and figure out what is going through his head. FAST!
2006-09-12 16:07:06 · answer #10 · answered by luv2bactin 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋