Okay, no critism, I know what I did, now a few months later I am pregnant again. I do have three children, and don't to go that route I did a few months ago. I have yet to tell my husband, I know he is going to be upset, and when he is upset, everything falls apart, including me.
Any ways to soften the blow?
I am going to carry this pregnancy, but he will not be happy. I know, he was there. what I need is advise to make things work.
2006-09-12 15:32:38 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
I must say, my husband works 70 plus hours weekly, financially supports us, and have every well intention to make this family move forward and have nice things in life.
Why did I have the abortion? That's strictly betweeen God and I.
Raising children is not cheap. I do want to continue this pregnancy and will.
I really am nervous about telling him because I know this is not exactly what he wants, now what I am asking, how would you tell him, ?
Mind you, I am very kind heart, tender worded, ladie. I dislike confrontation, and no he is not an abuser, I never even see him threw the week, he's mostly sleeping if he is not working.
2006-09-12 15:48:43 · update #1
And did Jesus make you the spokeman for prolife?!
My children very well indeed have loving parents, swettie, I am up 6/30 in the morning, making breakfast, playing w/them, their home is clean, they are well educated, I spend individual time with each of them, and lovely children. Three home cooked meals a day, so dont give me nonsense, until you paid my bills, walked a mile in my shoes, and read the bible begin to end, to cast stones, my walk is with God, not you!
2006-09-12 15:52:50 · update #2
Please take no notice of sweeny girl. she is incredibly rude and insensitive and all i can say to her is 'Judge not, lest you be judged yourself'. Anyway, i reported her......
Onto you sweetheart.....I know exactly what you are going through, i did the same thing, more or less. I don't already have three children though. I had an abortion and then became pregnant about a year later, but it was a surprise and unplannned. I think my husband wanted to do the same thing again, but i just couldn't. There comes a time when you have to face the consequences of your actions and get on with it. Having an abortion once is almost justifiable, but twice because we were silly enough not to use protection is pushing the boundaries a bit. Just tell him, your gonna have to at some point and discuss your options. Also maybe you should have a discussion with your OB/gyn to see what you you can do to prevent further pregnancies. Good luck to you and God bless.x
2006-09-12 16:30:58 · answer #1 · answered by lounursey 2 · 2⤊ 2⤋
Have you ever thought about birth control? If you have insurance (which I hope to God you do with three children and one on the way!) you should check into getting a copper IUD. It's more effective than the pill or condoms, is good for 10 years, and it's maintenance free (no remembering to take a pill every night or change a patch once a week or what have you). Most insurance companies pay for IUDs. There's also Mirena (hormonal) but I don't know much about that one.
My question to you is: If your husband works 70 hours per week, you never see him, and when he's home he's sleeping, how the **** did you find time to conceive two children??
2006-09-12 17:48:32 · answer #2 · answered by brevejunkie 7 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Just pray about it, you can't justify aborting or giving this child up for adoption when you have 3 children already. Life will be tough but as the years go on, you will know keeping your baby and raising it will be very rewarding. I suggest getting your tubes tied, I had a c-section and the doctor did the birth and then the tubal. If you don't have a c-section, it is minor surgery done Liproscopically, you will only miss a week from work. All I can really suggest is that if you two didn't want anymore kids, you should've taken more responsibility in making sure you didn't get pregnant. Take responsibility and raise your child.
2006-09-12 15:43:33 · answer #3 · answered by Jamie 2 · 2⤊ 1⤋
All I have to say is sorry about the abortion. I personally would not be able to live with my self after I killed one of my children. Your husband needs to be supportive for you. I am very happy to here you are carrying your next child and plan to let him live life. To soften the blow try bringing up memory's of you past pregnancy's. The unforgettable ones that make you both laugh. Try talking to him about how fun it is to see your kids grow up and become someone. I know there not cheep between my boyfriend and I we also have three and we are constantly buying stuff that they need. They grow to fast. Anyway I hope that you figure out what will work best and if your husband loves you he will eventually get used of the idea. Next time he will think twice about having unprotected sex. You play you pay. The child did not ask to be conceived. Good Luck and have fun!!!!
2006-09-12 16:59:50 · answer #4 · answered by babykins1025 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
sounds llike you have a real a$$hole for a husband. I would invest in birth control or a good lawyer to get rid of this D ick. If he doesnt support you and do what it takes for you and his kids THAT HE HELPED PRODUCE AS MUCH AS YOU- you would be better off without him having him pay child support. Leave him now, get a restraining order, have your baby and get ever last $$$ you can out of his disfunctional a$$.
you need to get out of that situation or your children will suffer in the long run. dont let years go by. your comment "soften the blow" really bothers me. I hope he is not a physical abuser along with a mental one. Get out now.
2006-09-12 15:38:28 · answer #5 · answered by adrixia 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
There is no rule that says that a married woman can't put a child up for adoption. If your children ask you about it, you can tell them that you are carrying a baby for someone else who can't have one. May not be something you want to do, but it's just a thought.
2006-09-12 15:35:47 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
make him see what you did a few months was something you are not willing to do again and tell him why and how hard it was and then try to look at the positive.a new baby a new life.i know how you feel i have 5 kids but my point is if you can feed 3 1 more wont hurt you anymore its not much of a financial difference
2006-09-12 15:37:43 · answer #7 · answered by toni r 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
funny,how you sound like a christian, but don't act like one.i think if you were,you woudn't have had an abortion. it sounds to me, that your hiding the fact that your husband has full control over you.abuser???whether it be mental or physical., it sure sounds like it to me.For some reason, i feel that you were forced by the husband to have one the last time.... is that right?? well, you need to have a mind of your own, and stick up for yourself. there is such a thing called government help, if you get a divorce.I just can't understand why in the hell that you didn't use birth control, you would have thought you would have learned your lesson the last abortion time. Grow up and get some balls lady!!!!
2006-09-12 16:41:43 · answer #8 · answered by jan 3 · 2⤊ 2⤋
You need to use birth control. If both of you decide not to keep this child pls. put it up for adoption. Make sure he is in a good mood when you tell him and I suggest sleeping in different rooms after the child is born. Good luck
2006-09-12 15:38:39 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
OK I really am strongly against abortion. It is killing an innocent baby that did nothing to deserve being killed. If you didn't want to get pregnant you should have used protection or excuse me for saying this but you need to keep your legs closed. Or put the baby up for adoption so it stands a chance of getting loving parents. I mean there are so many women out there who want a child but cant get pregnant and then there are girls who get pregnant who don't deserve to have such a precious gift as a baby. You need to stop getting pregnant. Please keep in mind when you have an abortion you are killing what could have been a loving couples little miracle.
2006-09-12 15:45:19 · answer #10 · answered by meanlilbitch23 3 · 2⤊ 3⤋