for school i have to right a poem on how i feel about sept.11.
tell me what you think.
[in the begining i plan on writing the pldege of alligence]
Our people held hands and slowly bowed their heads in memory.
Slow tears came rolling down our mourning faces.
You told me that everything would be okay.
And that Busch would see us threw this depressing plague.
I squeezed your hand a little tighter.
As he made the speech I then realized that even he doesn’t have a plan.
At first I thought our country would crash down.
Scapegoats and predigests sound like a recipe for destruction.
Suicide bombers, 4th amendment being ignored, hostages.
What ever happened to “I pledge allegiance to the flag”?
People wanting our country to fall to pieces.
Not being able to have dependable homeland security.
What ever happened to “and to the republic [for which it stands]”?
People became suspicious of immigrants from the middle-east.
We made names and jokes about people we know nothing about.
What ever happened to “Liberty and justice for all”?
Did we forget about the previous wars?
Fundraisers and concerts that were made to stop the violence?
Our country needs help and fighting will not solve anything.
We need someone’s shoulder to lean on.
No deceit or a shoulder that we have to bribe to lean on.
What ever happened to “one nation under god, indivincible”?
2006-09-12 14:04:54 · 4 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Other - Society & Culture
It is really good...
line 4: I think you mean Bush, not Busch
The first person already mentioned the indivincible thing.
Good job.
2006-09-12 14:11:48 · answer #1 · answered by Slider728 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it's nice. you can tell you put some time in it. i would do a spell check if i were you. also, Bush has no "c" in it.
i wouldn't put the pledge first. everyone knows it and probably wouldn't consider it part of the poem, and probably wouldn't read beyond it. also, the pledge isn't something you wrote yourself, so i wouldn't put it in part of "your" poem. taking bits and pieces like you did, however, i think is ok.
2006-09-12 21:13:47 · answer #2 · answered by Coltsgal 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its "one nation under God. Indivisible" Not invincible.
Otherwise it's a very good poem. Well done.
2006-09-12 21:08:05 · answer #3 · answered by asbratcher 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Umm..it's good.
2006-09-12 21:10:52 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋