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I have been married for almost a year now. Before we were married, my husband and I had a great sex life, having sex quite often. Since the marriage, however, sex has almost gone by the wayside. He is not afraid to show affection to me in public but at home, there is hardly any affection at all. Sure, he gives me hugs and kisses like usual but in the bedroom there is nothing...hardly anything at all. I don't know what I did to make him lose interest in me but I'm willing to try anything to save my marriage and gain my husband's interest again. I want him to make love to me like he used to but I don't know what to do.

2006-09-12 09:13:37 · 30 answers · asked by Lisa M 1 in Family & Relationships Marriage & Divorce

30 answers

1. Talk to him.
2. Go to marriage counseling.

Something is wrong, and you need to find out what and work it out, before it is too late.

2006-09-12 09:16:17 · answer #1 · answered by Dave 4 · 0 0

There are as many reasons relationships grow apart as there are people, so first, ask him. Communicate. And if he doesn't or won't communicate, I suggest a therapist, invite him, but if he won't go, go yourself anyway. Examine what you bring to the table, how have you changed, what are you doing or not doing differently? The ONLY portion you have control over is YOU, so work on being the best YOU possible, in every aspect. Work on being more sexy, more loving, more interesting, more emotionally balanced, and mentally stimulating. Be more of who you are. Examine how you treat him, and if you are loving and non-controlling. That's where therapy will help you, even if he doesn't attend. And if after you've done everything YOU can to be YOUR best, he is still non-responsive, consider that he is an individual with his own set of ideas, talents, and issues. Perhaps he needs to go or grow in a different direction. If the match isn't working, love him enough to let go. If it's love, he'll come back, if he doesn't then you'll be your best and you will find love again.

2006-09-12 09:50:50 · answer #2 · answered by shine_radiantstar 4 · 0 0

Restart the relationship. Plan some dates. Talk a lot. Smooch a lot. Plan some things together: future dates, a vacation, volunteer work, ... Work on being closer and he'll be more interested in lovemaking.

I really believe that married men are not very different from married women in this regard. Do you tell him that you love him, that you are proud of him, that you're glad he's your man, and that you're glad to be his woman? This is good stuff any time.

While you're working on those things, don't be afraid to kick things off yourself. Here are some ideas.

Stroll into the den nude, sit in his lap facing him and kiss him like he's going to Iraq next week. Then start undressing him. He'll get the idea.

Or, while he's sleeping, take him in your mouth. When wakes up, climb on and go for a ride. Or, buy some massage oils and learn how to massage each other.

If you're in bed and he turns you down, just pull down the covers and start masturbating slow and sexy. He'll get interested.

2006-09-12 09:26:39 · answer #3 · answered by Otis F 7 · 1 0

You can just wait, and hope that the sex will improve, get divorced, OR you can try talking to your spouse. You've only been married about a year, so boredom is lonnng in the future. It's possible that he's having trouble because the concept of "wife" is throwing him. Unless, you two calmly talk, and try to resolve this, your marriage is in danger of ending. Sex isn't marriage, it's just the frosting on the cake, but cake without frosting isn't all that great.

2006-09-12 09:30:48 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

He might be feeling down due to financial stress or weight gain or work overload. My husband and I went through a recent "dry-spell" as he would come home depleted of energy. We later found out that his unusual fatigue was due to a blood clot forming in his lung, The problem may be because of any of these factors, so investigate with an open mind. The last thing you should do is trick yourself into thinking that you're the cause. He loves you!

2006-09-12 09:19:41 · answer #5 · answered by Suz E. Home BAKER 6 · 0 0

My husband and i had a difficult patch after each one in every of our youngsters. I believe it is average to move via that considering your hormones are out of wack. Even though you is probably not interested you will have to at least make your husband completely happy as soon as per week. There are workout routines you are able to do with the youngster to get you again in shape. Your husband will emerge as extra as you think higher about yourself.... :) Get a massage or a pedicure with a buddy.... Or better but get a youngster sitter and get your husband to give you a therapeutic massage.

2016-08-09 14:19:11 · answer #6 · answered by jaspal 4 · 0 0

My husband and that i had a coarse patch after each of our childrens. i think of it is common to circulate by that with the aid of fact your hormones are out of wack. even nonetheless you is probably no longer fascinated you should a minimum of make your husband happy as quickly as a week. There are workouts you're able to do with the newborn to get you back in shape. Your husband will strengthen into extra fascinated as you sense extra appropriate approximately your self.... :) Get a rubdown or a pedicure with a chum.... or extra appropriate yet get a infant sitter and get your husband to furnish you a rubdown.

2016-11-07 04:42:23 · answer #7 · answered by ? 4 · 0 0

Interest will come and go. Try doing a sexy strip tease or a massage or get some new lingerie or shave your pubes in an interesting fashion. There are also tons of stuff for sexy fun at your local porn shop or spencers gifts. Try the dice, there a blast!

2006-09-12 09:16:47 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

Is he making love to the women he first met, ie. do you take the trouble to attract him? perfume you were wearing etc. or is he too juvenile to accept there are physical, mental, health reasons why you wont at times when he wants then so then he holds back from trying. Time to to talk to him. If you can't talk to him about sex you should be looking for someone you can-best of luck

2006-09-12 09:50:35 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

Why dont you cook a romantic dinner and then wear a sexy maids outfit and put some love music and then do a striptease and let him help you take off your clothes or you can put a porn movie that works for some men. P.S.good luck in getting your husband's attention.

2006-09-12 12:36:46 · answer #10 · answered by ANNIE 1 · 0 0

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