Ive got two great kids, a lovely home and a boyfriend of 8 years that would do anything for me. My problem is, im bored! All i seem to do is work, look after the kids and do housework.I don't seem to have anything to look forward to. My boyfriend shows me no affection or love ( even though i know he loves me ). When ever i talk to him he just roll's his eyes as if to say "whats she on about now!!!!!!!!!!!!!" I don't know what to do to stop me feeling this way. We don't row any more we just don't seem to comunicate at all.
2006-09-12 07:25:38 · 28 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
You answered your own question, if anyone else bothered to read the Whole of the details.
"My boyfriend shows me no affection or love."
Otherwise your life is fine, right?
Either dump the boyfriend (since he's not your husband) and get a new one, or get another "playmate" either a guy or a gal, to just have some honest **Fun** with.
Your life isn't fulfilling because it isn't that you're not getting out enough, but because what IS missing is the affection, tenderness, and rapture of physical fulfillment. You're missing the Intimacy of being in a relationship.
Maybe it isn't just about sex, there are other things a lot of the little things that make a world of importance, about being "involved" with someone. If its not there, you're just going to develope a nagging resentment in the back of your brain, and your spirit will suffer with the passing of the years.
Either, a part of you will die or you're gonna do something about it soon, before its too late. When it is too late, you will be miserable and too old to do a thing. You will just be bitter and jaded for the remainder of what is left of your life.
What is more important, the stability of your present relationship, or your happiness?
Wouldn't it be better, if you had a Mutual Happiness?
Right now - its only one sided. At least thats what it seems to me.
Oh well, its your life to live, you will always have a choice.
-
cheers !!!
2006-09-12 07:57:29 · answer #1 · answered by somber_pieces 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I think that it is time to sit down and talk to your boyfriend. Explain to him that you are bored and that you feel that although you know that he loves you, you just are not feeling the passion anymore. I talked to my husband about this at one point and nothing changed. We ended up getting seperated and then we tried to work on things again, but when i had planned a great nite for the both of us, renting a hotel room with hot tub the only thing we could find to talk about was our kids nothing romantic happen all nite. after that we have decided to get a divorce. I am a woman and so are you. If we don't have a man by us to tell us and make us still feel attractive and romantically wanted what do we have? Nothing. I say talk to him if nothing changes perhaps it is just time to move on. I know that you both love each other emotionally but a relationship has to have passion as well to stay alive.
2006-09-12 07:39:43 · answer #2 · answered by Mel 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you're stuck in a routine. Do something for you. Would your boyfriend watch the kids so you could get a massage, go shopping, or whatever that you like to do?
As for the eye rolls from your boyfriend...you say that you know that he loves you; however, showing lack of respect by not meeting your intimate emotional needs (I'm not talking about sex here) isn't showing love.
Sounds like the two of you need to sit down and have a heart to heart to find out what you both want out of life. Good Luck!
2006-09-12 07:29:48 · answer #3 · answered by Mom of One in Wisconsin 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
hey i know what you mean ,,, the key to fixing this problem is making someone looking after your kids say at least one day a week while you get pampered or go cinemas or to clubs and places liek that if that type of thing aint you , you should try to communicate with your boyfriend BE FIRM with him and tell him how you really feel BUT YOU MUST BE FIRM AND serious otherwise he'll just roll his eyes as you say ,,,if sex isnt good look ways to spice it up toys,lubes and all sorts ,,im sure your life will improve ..go cinemas with kids in your spare time when there not at scool and your not working ,,go to a restaurant with your boyfriend wen someones got the kids or go as a family ,,, only you can make your life more interesting !
2006-09-12 07:35:41 · answer #4 · answered by Izzy10 S 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes I understand what you aresaying my man works a lot of hours and I stay at home with my one and a half year old. I know that he is tired at the end of the night but everytime that I try to start something sexual with him he just rolls over and goes to bed I mean not to be nasty even if I gave him some head he will still just go to bed like I wasn't even there I mean I wanted some attention if I went through all of that for you, you know I wish that men would just understand that the women in their lives need attention also.
2006-09-12 07:37:20 · answer #5 · answered by Shanana 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is completely normal. I have been married for 31 years, and what changes is the situation. Now you have children,whereas before you could come and go as you pleased. Just set aside a day or night during the week to have a date with your boyfriend. Hire a sitter for the children, and get to really know each other again. Go to dinner, just be alone connect again and always remember, before the children it was just the two of you, your love is what brought them along. Enjoy each other and life!
2006-09-12 07:34:18 · answer #6 · answered by june clever 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It happens. Same thing here actually. I admit I'm a bit hard to deal with, pregnant and homonal, but I am bored! I tried "spicing things up" and he thinks I'm crazy, or he's just not into it. I see it as I'm luckier than most. We could be raising our children alone, or not have any kids for that matter! We could be totally alone all the time, instead of having someone even if they do seem a bit disinterested at times. If you wanna chat, I'm online lots....LOL! Helps ease some of the bordom!! Take care :)
2006-09-12 07:31:04 · answer #7 · answered by XxbrooklynnxX 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you should find some time for yourself, and find something new to do that you enjoy, whether that involves night classes, or a sport, just something that lets you be yourself and have fun, and leave your boyfriend to look after the kids whilst you are out! You could also try going for fun days out with the family, like a walk in the countryside or whatever, so that you can all relax and have fun together.
2006-09-12 07:56:04 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like he has swapped his mother for you, and you are letting him. If he can't be bothered wining, dining and romancing you, he needs a wake up call. Get yourself some new outfits, glam yourself up, so he can't fail to notice and get out with the girls for some fun on the town. Make sure you stay out late a few times and when he starts to get rattled, sit him down and let him know exactly where he is going wrong. ie You are not his mother, you are his wife/girlfriend/lover and would like to be treated as such. You could withdraw cooked meals and nuptual rights (which he doesn't have anyway if he can't be bothered to marry you.) until it dawns on him what he is in danger of losing.
Taliesin (A real man)
2006-09-12 11:53:33 · answer #9 · answered by Taliesin 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to really sit him down and tell him how you feel. As for you being bored, do you have friends that you could go out with every once in a while? Do you have any relatives that could watch the kids while you spend some time with friends or yourself? Everyone should make time for themselves sometimes.
2006-09-12 07:39:35 · answer #10 · answered by tantalizin1 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋