How do you become more assertive?

Question

I lack the ability to be able walk in a room and start chatting to people, how do i overcome that?

Answer 1

Give off an air of confidence, like it doesn't matter wether people speak to you or not. People will become curious of this mystery character. Throw caution to the wind. My first day at catering college I strolled into the class (admittedly scared, but knowing everybody else starting that day would be too, to a greater or lesser extent) and walked behind the tutors desk and said "Good morning class!" (Yes, they thought I was the tutor!) Certainly broke the Ice!

Answer 2

i use to have this problem and to some extent i still do . it comes from not having self expectant and you can't give a f**k about what people think about because they probably have the same problem as you. you just have to throw yourself in there and before you go in clam your self, keep your head up and try just think about good things about yourself . if your stuck for to talk about start talking about why you are there talk about the situation try being funny and using humour it makes you more approachable.
don't look nervous and if you do get nervous think of somewhere you don't get nervous and feel comfy. the more you do this the easier it gets and you build confidence gradually you can't expect to transform in one day. do it every change you get and don't get intimidated because they can be intimidated by you.

Answer 3

well first find out if you are just shy, cause being shy and being assertive are 2 different things. also having charisma and being assertive are also 2 different things
You are assertive!!!
You just asked an assertive question!!
You are OK just the way you are, there is no rule saying we all have to be chatty in a room.
Maybe it is the wrong type of people and not you !

Answer 4

you may have to get in some arguments because some people have dominant personalities and only like the passive - When you start to assert yourself with certain people you will find out. It will pay off in the long run though as you will get things and find out answers more quickly - one of the things you will get is more respect.

Answer 5

I think if you were to work on your self confidence, that may help. And try to be more social. Maybe your an introvert. There is nothing wrong with that. Be you. But if you think it is anxiety, talk to a professional about it. Explore why you think you are truly not assertive. It may just be you and if it is that is OK. But if there is a problem, fix it.

Answer 6

I find role playing helps. Pretend you are some one else and just jump into the role and do what you think that character you are would do. I am shy by nature but I had my Nurse personality and knew I had to jump in there and make the person I cared for comfortable and give them the best care I could. When at home I am still shy by nature.

Answer 7

confidence plays a big role in being assertive.
you have to be very comfortable with who you are. Until you can be confident and comfortable with you as a whole your assertiveness comes out more.

Answer 8

Confidence. Build up your self esteem and you will increase your confidence. Remember you may receive 100 compliments and only one criticism, but you will remember the criticism because negative is easier to believe.

Answer 9

It's all about having confidence in yourself. You have to be confortable with yourself, accepting yourself for what you are. Stop worrying about "what people will think/say" and just act naturally. The rest will follow.

Answer 10

study Lee Canter's assertive discipline