After years of talking about it - and dreaming about it - we finally brought another man into our bedroom to have sex with my wife.
We are adults - it was a mutual fantasy.
Overall - the experience was "ok". Both my wife and I got some wild fantasies fulfilled. He ended up sleeping alone with her in our room ovenight - they had sex 5 times total. When he left the next morning -my wife and I agreed, we would not do it again.
She admitted she could never get comfotable with him - she thought she could just "have sex" - but realized she needs some emotions involved there too. Also his size made her more sore than anything else as well. She IS glad she got to feel that.
OK ...
The guy - wont leave us alone now! He calls every day, he showed up at our house last night (expecting he could just sleep with her again)
We explained nicely it was just a one time thing for us, but he does not get it .
In all our planning this was 1 thing we did not expect.
How do we get rid of him?
2006-09-12 06:00:34 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
fyi...we have been married 5 years. We are very much in love- that has not changed.
We were hoping to avoid the police -
its probably our only option at this point.
Thanks for the honest answers..
2006-09-12 06:10:49 · update #1
restraining order.... file a complaint that he's harrassing u.. and just to let u know that was stupid on both of ur parts to bring anyone in ur home.. u and him and ur wife should've went to a hotel..
next time if there's a next time u need to go to a hotel...
2006-09-12 06:03:27 · answer #1 · answered by Queen D 5 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Things like that happend when you open up your life to another person on such an intimate level. Bringing someone else into a marriage is never going to work out even if it's just to fulfill a fantasy. Your fantasy could turn into a nightmare if you dont call the cops and get rid of this guy!
2006-09-12 13:17:18 · answer #2 · answered by MandaSue 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he is married, tell him you are going to call his wife. If he is not, just don't answer the door when he shows up. If he calls, hang up. He should get the message. But here is the bad part. By cutting him off, you will probably make an enemy out of him. He has a lot of dirt on you guys now, and will probably start spreading it around. I realize this is going to be difficult. Be ready for some rough times. Hind sight is always 20/20
2006-09-12 13:06:40 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all, I should congratulate you! This is called true love, and I really appreciate the fact that you are ready to accept and do anything to keep your wife happy, in any way. One confusion many peole tend to do is that they take sex for love. Sex is just a pleasure which is physical, just like you like to eat chocolate. sex is just a mean of expressing ones love, but is not love at all and thats why I want to congratulate you for realising this! Anyway, as far as your problem is concerned, probably you committed the mistake of bringing someone who isn't as open-minded as you both and is just one of the common man! I believe, when choosing your man, you should have make him understand the reason behind you accepting him sleeping with your wife, and also make sure that he understood your objective. Probably that is the root of your problem. Now that he isn't letting you live in peace, I believe you should both call him someday, talk to him clearly, explain to him what was your goal behind calling him, and most importantly apologise to him for giving him the hope that he can sleep with your wife whenever he likes. Clear this misunderstanding of his. The apology (that should be from the heart) is the trick that can surely let you live better!
Wish you both a very Happy life full of Love!
2006-09-12 13:28:45 · answer #4 · answered by Goldenheart 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Swinging can be Russian Roulette. My wife and I are swingers and have been around a bit. We have avoided such problems by taking certain steps... but that is not what your question is about.
Assuming that you have already told him that this was a one time deal, the next step is to tell him you are going to the cops. Then bite the bullet and go to the cops. Trust me they have seen weirder then this. Plus there is the added benefit that the most common professions among swingers are cops and teachers... so you just might end up with a swinging cop on the case.
2006-09-12 13:07:10 · answer #5 · answered by David P 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all I wonder was it on the 1st..2nd...3rd...4th..or 5th time that she realised that she didn't like it...I think she liked it well enough to keep doing it..That said you made a huge mistake not laying down the rules with this guy at the very start..If he continues to harrass you you must get a restraining order against him...your one night of lust is costing you dearly and may cost you even more before it is all said and done.
2006-09-12 13:07:08 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just tell him goodbye. Explain it was a one night thing and leave it at that. Let him know that you do not want to do the legal thing just to get rid of him but you will if need be. It will be embarrasing but at least it will end the situation.
2006-09-12 13:06:27 · answer #7 · answered by wwclark 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wake up and forget this pitiful incident that you made up. It was just another of your wet dreams. Get a life and get a wife. Reality rules.
2006-09-12 13:03:24 · answer #8 · answered by Rich Z 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You never should have started it in the first place,,,but since you did,,,,if he won't leave you alone tell him you will call the police. That should take care of it.
2006-09-12 13:05:25 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
You bought this ******** HOME?
Next time he shows up tell him no more. And explain that if shows up again, you will call the police.
2006-09-12 13:06:44 · answer #10 · answered by tallerfella 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋