about 2 weeks ago, my girlfriend (of 4 and half years) got a text message from her ex (whom she broke up with 5 years ago) saying that he couldn't go on and how he was a failure and such. She ignored it at first (mainly because I told her that he is just trying get you back into his life), but he kept sending messages to her about how he "had no will to live", so she decided to call him to see what was going on.
before I go any further, let me just say that we all have a similar group of friends and that we ran into him a few times in the past and both of us were friendly towards him, you know it's been five years since the two of them went out, and we both thought that he had moved on with his life.
Anyway, he tells my girlfriend this sob story about how he's a failure at everything he does, and when my girlfriend asked him to elaborate he wouldn't, only saying " I'm pathetic" She tells him he's wasting her time and hangs up. This past friday, he sends another text....
2006-09-12 05:40:00 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
next text says I'm in love with you. Then yesterday, he's sending her these messages like: You're in denial, you're still in love with me.
She says it's been 5 years, I don't love you leave me alone. He keeps sending more and more messages.
I told her to we're changing her phone # and If worse come to worse restraining order. What would you do?
2006-09-12 05:43:34 · update #1
Ok...She knows I don't like her keep in contact with him, that why she didn't originally, but she didn't want that guilt if he killed himself or something.
At this point it's more of a "this guy's an obvious lunatic and what's going to do next situation" Oh I forgot to mention, he turned into a herion addict in the past few months. I have the feeling this might be fueling this insanity of his.
2006-09-12 05:51:13 · update #2
I can relate to your girlfriend to a T. From where I am in this pretty much identical situation, I can say this:
The love I have for my ex is still in existence. It is mutilated and destroyed, but still there. He is one to put himself down to get attention from someone... particularily me. It is how he always got me back in the past. By crying and telling me that he loved me and he F-ed up and that he would kill himself if he didn't get me back. The only thing that seems to work is a lot of distance. I know it's not as easy as moving out of state and changing your name, but changing her number was a good start. Try hanging out with different people. If you don't want to do that, make sure your mutual friends know that you don't want her ex knowing about what's going on in your life. It'll only make him think of her and that's not fair to anyone. Distance, distance, distance.
2006-09-12 05:55:15 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Since you have the same circle of friends I wonder if changing her number will work as it will take a few days for him to get her new number from another friend who is close to your girlfriend.
This is rather a bolder suggestion that she invites him for a snack in an open place and then she turns up with you and then BOTH of you can tell him your pieces of mind.He'ld be so ashamed because I think he does not know that you are aware of what he is texting to your girlfriend.
Or the two of you can exchange chips so that when he calls you will be answering all the time.He'll get the message real fast!!
All the best.
2006-09-12 06:11:51 · answer #2 · answered by jes 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
that person is surely desperate and might need help, thats why he has turned back to your gf. Well, on humanitarian ground, instead of handing him to the police, along with your girlfriend you should both meet him, sit and talk to him to know what is his real problem. Its probably because he is alone and has no friends (true) to whom he can confess, that's why he is doing such things. So open a door for him and become his friends. Talk to him gently and give him confidence in himself. Help him to live and show him that there are plenty in life to cheer about. If possible help him to get a girlfriend. Always be ready to help him out whenever he might need. You know my friend, handing him to the police or taking any negative action against him is like declaring war to him. You never know what will be his reaction. He may become violent and harm you both or never let you both live in peace. Wherever there is war, there is only darkness and sadness. Wherever there is peace there is happiness. You are very lucky as you have got a very good opportunity to do a very good deed. You shouldn't let it go. Help him out and you will be all very happy!
Good luck and take care
2006-09-12 06:00:58 · answer #3 · answered by Goldenheart 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I think after 5 years he finally realized what a good thing he had. Now it's catching up to him and wants her back. If I was her I wouldn't want him. He sounds like he has low self esteem. She needs to tell him to stop texting her and to move on with his life. Good luck!
2006-09-12 05:47:40 · answer #4 · answered by aimstir31 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Be honest with your girlfriend. Let her know that you do not like her keeping in contact with her EX. Tell her that it really bothers you and if she cares about you she will end it. She is probably just curious and just needs some closure. Best wishes to you.
2006-09-12 05:45:12 · answer #5 · answered by machelle6691 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
well depending on your job and her job o would see about moving and changing numbers and such
if it gets really bad i would call the police and get a restraining order.
or give him some other sigh that he is not wanted
2006-09-12 05:46:40 · answer #6 · answered by james 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yep, change the number. If he keeps bothering her, she needs to call the police.
2006-09-12 05:46:15 · answer #7 · answered by ~~ 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
SHE NEEDS TO IGNORE HES MESSAGES. HES JUST LOOKIN FOR DA ATTENTION ONCE HE SEES DAT SHES NOT PAYIN ATTENTION N DAT HES NOT GETTIN TO HER HE WILL SOON GET TIERD N MOVE ON. BUT DA PROBLEM IS DAT YA RUN WITH DA SAME PPL. WORD GETS AROUND IT YA ARGUE OR HAVIN PROBLEMS N HE FINDS OUT N HE WILL TRY TO COME IN WEN SHES DOWN. SO IF U LOVE HER N YA WANT DIS RELATIONSHIP TO WRK SHE EITHER NEEDS TO TELL HIM STRAIGHT UP IM OVER U U DONT MEAN NOTHING TO ME LEAVE ME ALONE IM HAPPY OR YA NEED TO FIND URSELF A NEW GROUP OF FRIENDS
2006-09-12 05:45:45 · answer #8 · answered by mperez637 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Have her change her number no more texts.
2006-09-12 05:43:13 · answer #9 · answered by Rachel Bitchface 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ha! sounds like my ex!! I changed my number.
2006-09-12 05:49:35 · answer #10 · answered by Ash 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋