my fiancee and I have a computer although it is not hooked up yet. It was his before we were together. So i am gonna buy a lap top and i told him last night that it will be nice that we each have our own computer. He said why and i said because I don't like anyone one messing with mine, and i don't. He told me he would "touch" it any time he wants and he wouldn't care if I used his, and he has nothing to hide. I don't either, but I will keep personal bank account info, journal type stuff like poetry, and work related stuff on mine just like my work computer. Its not that I want to hide anything, but i feel like we share EVERYTHING already, and if I buy my own laptop with my own money, and he already has his own computer, why should he use mine? If he need to use it briefly for somthing, no problem, but is it wrong to want some personal freedom?
2006-09-12 04:40:49 · 13 answers · asked by ladyjno7 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Yes, I consider the computer to be a personal item. No different than say a journal, a bank account or even your clothing closet. My significant other and I each have our own computers and consider them to be our own personal space. But, we also believe that trust must run through the veins of our relationship for this situation to be positive.
So, if/when you establish the trust, having separate computers will become a non issue.
2006-09-12 04:57:03 · answer #1 · answered by -:¦:-SKY-:¦:- 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I agree with you. You don't have to share everything. If you both hav your own computer than there is no reason to use each other's. He doesn't need to look through your things or pry into your personal information which is stored on a computer, especially if he has his own. I personally place a password on my computer for the very same reason. I do not want other members of the household logging onto my account. It is not that I have anything to hide, I just prefer to keep things of my own private.
2006-09-12 11:46:05 · answer #2 · answered by MaybeToday 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
So use passwords to keep him from accessing your computer. Poetry can sometimes be a person's diary...if you don't want him reading it, tell him so. Should you want to share it with him, you will do so on your own. Personal bank account info...well, if it's your own savings that he doesn't contribute to, then you have every right to safeguard it, no matter who is in your life. If you're getting a laptop, take it with you everywhere you go...don't leave it where he can try to access it. If he's got a computer, I honestly don't see why he'd need to use yours, for any reason whatsoever!
2006-09-12 11:48:18 · answer #3 · answered by SassySours 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that everyone needs their own personal computer. that's probably why its called a PC.
OK joking aside. You need your own space to . as well as your own bank account. otherwise you'll feel invaded and start to feel resentment. If you feel resentment it's all over . Tell him to grow up and be a little more independent. Just because your living together, or even married, doesn't mean that you give up your space or your independence. I strongly suggest you even have your own investments .
2006-09-12 11:54:35 · answer #4 · answered by joy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no, you need to have some things to yourself. do you really want him to check up on every search you have made? do you think you will be able to agree on how much memory should be taken up by photos, music files, etc.? how do you think either of you would react if one of you deletes the other files? and how about when something goes wrong with the computer? would you be blaming eachother?besides, people are turning to computers more and more so it gets to the point when your entire life is kept on it, it is a dayplanner/diary/address book/ stereo/ dvd player and everything in between! it is the ultimate multipurpose tool, i would love to have my own.
2006-09-12 11:48:56 · answer #5 · answered by bad kitty 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I've been using computers since 1985 and now I work with IT departments. I aggree that personal computers are your own personal space sort of speaking. You can if you have Windows XP PRo create another account for him and have your password and him have his password and he can only see his stuff and you can see your stuff but I still think its a personal thing and each person should have his/her own PC regardless.
2006-09-12 11:44:29 · answer #6 · answered by Triskelion 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I agree with you. Everyone needs their own space whether they ar e married or not. If he trusts you , he should already know that it is a simple little thing called respect for one's privacy. Every human deserves that.
2006-09-12 11:45:23 · answer #7 · answered by Ellyn 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well I¸m married and we have two computers and I thank God every day for that :)))...it¸s something personal and you should have something that it¸s just yours...computer or something else it doesn¸t matter...personal freedom is not something that you should have to ask for, it should be given you no question asked :)!
2006-09-12 11:46:35 · answer #8 · answered by momithesnake 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He sounds pretty insecure and controlling.
2006-09-12 11:50:47 · answer #9 · answered by Scott L 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, because hackers can access it anytime they want.
2006-09-12 11:41:57 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋