The thing is that he lives in queens and she lives in texas they never saw eachother only through pictures and writing letters and talking on the phone. But he would tell her he loves her and he told her that he would go to texas with her to live. When I called the girl she told me that was her boyfriend and that she did not know about me. Well he stopped contact with her and I forgived him do you thing I should of left him should I call this cheating?
2006-09-12 03:15:24 · 33 answers · asked by akdmkslady 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
In a way I think you should leave him after the baby but at least he was honest and u forgave him!!
2006-09-12 03:18:06 · answer #1 · answered by memi_2hot 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Technically it was cheating, and I hope you didn't forgive him quite that easily! But, it's not uncommon for men to go through times that they need outside affection when they have a pregnant spouse because even though you have way more pressure on you from it, he could be feeling some sort of need for affection that he cannot recieve from you at this moment. But even if that's the case, it's still wrong. Just be thankful he wasn't with her physically, and I hope he wasn't ever really seriously planning on it. Understanding is the main key though, understand before you make decisions. Make sure you observe all views.
2006-09-12 03:22:51 · answer #2 · answered by *Elle Marie* 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Due to "feel good" daytime programs like Opra, Dr. Phil, & others, the original meaning of "relationship cheating" has been turned from a physical act to also a mental one. The problem with this is that desires or fantasies can now be called "cheating"...
So, I would not call this "cheating".... no physical contact.
I would however call his behavior dishonest... untrustworthy...
I would question him & his motives for having the secret friend...
What was he getting out of the letters & phone calls?
Sounds to me like you need to have some answers & more communication between the two of you.
2006-09-12 03:59:48 · answer #3 · answered by gurlyruby 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well i guess everyones definition of cheating is different. To some cheating would have to have some physical contact. Others may think that fatc that they thought they were bf/gf would imply that is enough to be considered as cheating. Either way, your bf is not loyal or trustworthy. The fact that you are carrying his child means he is totally immature and irresponsible too. You have to start thinking about your family's future. Ideally he has to be part of that. Doing it yourself is a lot to ask for. Try to work things out with him and make him understand his RESPONSIBILITIES. Otherwise take every penny you can get for child support.
2006-09-12 03:19:56 · answer #4 · answered by Wibble 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ITS CHEATING! Leave his butt in the dust and move on with your life . For your own sanity. How can you raise a kid if you are wondering if your man is cheating or even having internet relationships. Youll carry a resentment that will reflect on everything and once y our child is old enough he/she will figure out something is NOT right with Mommy and Daddy. Do you want to raise your kid in an envirnment?
Ask yourslef:
can i be happy with a man who lies, cheats and hides stuff from me?
will this type of man be there for my and my child should i really need him to be?
can i ever trust him? will i believe him ?
If you answered NO to any of them think about staying with him real hard. It may not be the right decision.
Once a cheat always a cheat luv.
2006-09-12 03:24:21 · answer #5 · answered by Coyote 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well I think the preganany maybe had him some what overwhelmed and scared thats probably why he starting talk to this girl in the first place. It doesn't sound like cheating though I wouldn't be scared. Is he with you right now and being supportive of your child? B/c if he is then don't worry about it. Let the past be...
2006-09-12 03:18:44 · answer #6 · answered by lasugarfree 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have been mislead to believe him that you were the love oif his life when in fact he was planning a another relation else where. Until you lock him down with marriage...he is subject to leave at any time and at best you may get your child support and lose your Man.
I think you and him need to sit down seriously and talk your realtionship over because what he did was wrong and you don;t want to be hurt anymore than you already have.
2006-09-12 03:20:20 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wwell the fact that you were pregnant and he did that,, means that he can do it again,, he has no respect for you ,,, now that you have a baby on the way or already there ,, you have to think about your baby first,,, yes a child needs a father but he has to give his family the respect they deserve without that there isnt a relationship,,, and in my book that is cheating,, once he told her he loved and would move with her ,, ....
2006-09-12 03:22:49 · answer #8 · answered by jzharah25 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
In my books it qualifies as cheating. i dont stand for any bs from guys while in a relationship. Women are meant to be cherished, loved, appreciated by their boyfriends/husbands. Anything that falls out of that category is not meeting my standard and the guy is out. Looks like if he cherished or loved or even appreciated you, he wouldn't be looking for a sidedish. That's exactly what he did (or maybe is still trying to do). I am not one to share my guys. So personally I would leave him. I realize you are pregnant (is he the father?), so maybe you need him for that. But I know women who will put up with abuse just to stay with the father of the child. That is why the system is in strict favor of child support regardless of circumstance. You are the best judge, if he is lacking in your eyes, dump him, you deserve to be cherished. Make sure the father supports the child though, ok?
2006-09-12 03:21:01 · answer #9 · answered by yara c 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have already forgiven him. Can you trust him now? Can you live without him? I don't know if he cheated because , he may not have believed you were in a committed relationship at the time. Is he the father? Did he say you were the 'one and only' and the 'only one'? You have to define your relationship now and ask him if he will be faithfull ...then let him prove it. Good luck
2006-09-12 03:22:10 · answer #10 · answered by toe poe gee gee oh 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's definatly on the path of cheating and in a way it really is but it's mental not physical. Since he has stopped maybe you got through to him and I would tell him that one more time and it's over.
2006-09-12 03:19:10 · answer #11 · answered by VeeateU 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋