I want a baby bad and he doesn't,, how do I get him to at least think about it??
He says he's too old ( he's 35)
that he's scared about money,,
that he thinks he will be terrible at parenting,, even though he has raised my two kids for most of their lives.
I just don't understand what his hang up is?
2006-09-12 03:13:47 · 17 answers · asked by B V 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
B.V., I'll advice you to be content with those two kids of yours. See, despite the fact that they are yours, he's doing his possible best in raising them. I can understand your opinion that it won't be nice if you don't give him his own biological child - a child he can call his own. But since he's not thinking along that line (being a guy who is NOT selfish), then please go along with him and forget about having a baby for him - at least for now. Your happiness is the most paramount. Cheers!
2006-09-12 03:24:54 · answer #1 · answered by mykemejeje 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like a lot of excuses not to have a baby, which really means he just doesn't want to have a baby with you. Don't take any offense to that. Age is hardly an excuse not to have a baby. Maybe money may be an issue, but age is not. Im 39 and I can't wait to have a baby with my significant other. Why do you really need to have a baby? That's the real question? Im sure you already have two beautiful children. If you continue to push this issue, you will eventually push him away and then you will be all alone. Ask yourself why you need a baby????? The real answer is inside you.
2006-09-12 10:27:26 · answer #2 · answered by danny_austin4 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Sometimes people just don't want another kid. I have 2 and I'm done. I want to move forward and I'm looking forward to the time where they are independent and I can have more free time. I know it sounds selfish...but it's something nice to look forward to. Don't think of it as something he's doing to spite you. I don't blame him for not wanting to get up for middle of the night feedings, or deal with ear infections, or crying babies.
Your kids will have grandkids in the near future. Wait for them and have a happy life with your husband
2006-09-12 14:23:20 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
My dear, it isn't a "hang up." It sounds like he has put a lot of thought into it. I am really sorry that you want a child and he doesn't. If it is that important to you, then you might really want to consider leaving him and finding someone who wants to be a daddy. Please don't lie to him to get him to get you pregnant. The child will really pay for that. You have a hard decision to make. I think it is time to sit down and make a list of the pro's and con's with this relationship and see where you want to go with it. Take your time making the list. Don't make any rush decisions.
God Bless and Good Luck
2006-09-12 10:21:07 · answer #4 · answered by cinson1999 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Age.. He is 35 and if you started on one today, he would be 36 when it was born and 54 when he got out of high school. This thought is pretty scary to most guys especially if they have thought about how they want to spend their time when they are middle aged.
2006-09-12 10:17:46 · answer #5 · answered by Mr Cellophane 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Having a child with you means committment to the relationship - is he perhaps a bit scared of the responsibility?
He's OK with your children because they're not his and if he walked away from you he wouldn't have the responsibility for paying to look after them.
We all have to start somewhere with parenting ... and he wouldn't exactly be the only father to be, would he?
2006-09-12 10:17:58 · answer #6 · answered by Marinersfan 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him that fatherhood is amazing regardless of age. I am 47 with a 2 year old and a 4 year old [also older ones] and I find being a parent now so much more fulfilling. Not only that they keep you young!
2006-09-12 10:21:33 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
rich or poor money and kids will always be difficult to control but a person cannot wait for all things to even out.
2006-09-12 10:17:44 · answer #8 · answered by Commander 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
this is one of those things that both of you definately have to totally agree on. if you try to convince him or trick him or pull him into it unwillingly he will grow to resent you and your baby and you definately do not want that. now its up to you, are you willing to give up being a parent to stay with him, or do you want children so bad that you would leave him. its a tough spot to be in, but i implore you.... do not force him into having children, it will not turn out like you want it to!!!
2006-09-12 10:20:13 · answer #9 · answered by whaaatthe 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think he told you what his hang up is... money and age...
While he is still very much young. the money thing could weight him down....
Encourage him, let him you that all will work out with $
Good Luck
2006-09-12 10:21:26 · answer #10 · answered by moonlite1us 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋