i had an abortion in december i was fine after it but i have recently just found out that my cousins girlfriend is pregnant. i cant bring myself to speak to anyone at home because all they seem to talk about is her baby. what is wrong with me?
2006-09-12 02:51:33 · 26 answers · asked by vickiebeeeeeeeeeee 1 in Health ➔ Women's Health
There is nothing wrong with you.
Having a termination is not a nice experience even if you know it is the right decision and when we are reminded of it, it can make us feel sad for what might have been.
It will get easier and try and remember your reasons for doing it in the first place. When the time is right, if you want to, I'm sure you will have your own!
Best wishes.
2006-09-12 03:10:31 · answer #1 · answered by Kate 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Hey, abortions can be a difficult thing for a gal no matter what her political feelings on the topic.
We're genetically programmed for babies, and losing one can be really difficult, especially if you had any doubts as to whether or not you wanted to keep it. Honestly, I'd reccomend seeing someone, just a couple of times. A third party can be good, because they're removed from the situation and non-biased, they can help you get your ideas out without judging you. Maybe a therapist, or maybe a good friend who you trust. Make sure they respect your decision even if they don't like it, and can offer semi unbiased opinions and help.
If it gets really bad, there are helplines you can call toll free just to speak to someone. It's anonymous and safe, and no one will think anything less of you.
Good luck with whatever you decide to do and I hope you get through this.
2006-09-12 09:56:24 · answer #2 · answered by gheefreak 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Hi - I think that the emotional side of abortions should be highlighted as much as the physical. Its only natural for you to be thinking of the 'what ifs' now theres a new little one on the way. I think maybe you could do with some form of counselling, to help you come to terms with the decision you made in December. I dont know what your reasons were for the termination but it was obviously right for you. Def speak to a professional about your feelings. Take care
2006-09-12 10:41:25 · answer #3 · answered by Secret Squirrel 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
They will never tell you this at the clinics, but most women have strong reactions of one kind or another after an abortion. Often, severe and long-term emotional ones.
You are reacting to what happened. Whether or not I agree with it aside, you seem to regret the abortion on some level. You might wish to find someone you trust to discuss it with.
2006-09-12 09:58:11 · answer #4 · answered by K B 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you have been holding in your real feelings about the abortion. even though you may have thought it was the right thing to do at the time, it is still a really traumatic thing to go through and you may feel depressed or guilty about it. i have been going through the same thing. i had a termination 5 years ago and my sister was pregnant at the same time as me, but had her baby.although i have had twins and another baby since,i sometimes have flashbacks to the sights and sounds in the clinic and still get upset sometimes about the baby i didnt have. i dont believe that we are given enough advice about the long lasting emotional damage that it causes, and you may feel you need to talk things through with a counsellor. lots of love to you for the future, youre not alone.
2006-09-12 10:11:59 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
There is NOTHING wrong with you. These are emotional feelings that are natural and especially when all people talk about is babies and you chose not to have one. Remind yourself WHY you had your abortion and that you took control of you life. You should be proud of yourself. If you can avoid this talk do so, if not, know that you took care of yourself and that it was difficult but you are a strong woman.
Do NOT feel guilty about it. A baby who is going to be part of a loving and capable family (could just be money!), is going to have a very hard life. Later you can have your children when things are more settled and you can really be a MOM!!
2006-09-12 09:58:24 · answer #6 · answered by Barbara A 2 · 3⤊ 1⤋
Nothing!! You are human, and have emotions. having an abortion is the hardest thing ever, you would not be human if you did not get all emotional, and i warn you, you will think about this for the rest of your life hun. It will get easier, but it will always be there. You will always wonder what if.... but this is just you being a perfectly normal emotional human being. You will be fine, just let your emotions run their course. Good luck.
2006-09-12 11:40:52 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
don't let anyone here tell you what you didi was wrong!! It was your choice, and you made it for a reason, because it was your best choice at that time!! It is normal for you too feel that way, because for some women it emotionally effects them. Just try and find someone to talk to about it, or write what you feel in a journal, but you didn't do anything wrong!!
Helen B. ....I guess I am not human cause it does not effect me emotionaly at all.
2006-09-12 11:45:03 · answer #8 · answered by dreamer 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Honey you'd be "Surprised" how many women get abortions!! I had too, because my first husband, kicked me in the stomache, when we just got done announcing to our family we were having another baby!! He got on "Drugs" and I told him how can we afford to have a baby, if your doing "Drugs"? He said "Well I'll take care of that right now!!!" He then proceded to take me by the shoulders, and started kneeing me in my stomache!! I knew that night the baby had died, from my hormones... I went to the doctor, with him the next morning, and made him watch the "Ultrasound" and they couldn't find a heart-beat!! So, they ended up having to do a "Out-patient" DNC, on me!! On the way home, I was crying, and the "Pig" had thee "Odasity!!!" to tell me, "I hope you know I want to have more children!!!" I devorced him, shortly after that, as soon as I got on my own feet!! I'd of pressed-charges, but I was deathly afraid of this man!!! My girlfriend and my next-door neighbors heard the whole arguement that night, and boy did they give him an "Ear-full !!!" My girlfriend especially, told him how he could have not only killed the baby, but me!! And she was "Yelling at him, at the top of her lungs!!!" anyway, just let the air clear, and things will soon be back to normal...... I would ask God to forgive you, though..
2006-09-12 10:11:04 · answer #9 · answered by Hmg♥Brd 6 · 0⤊ 2⤋
you have not dealt will what you did . maybe you feel deep down that you should have kept your baby. doesn't matter what other people say ,they wernt you at that time when you made the decision to do it. it is natural for you to feel "left out" inside you may be thinking that could have been me, maybe it would have been good and worked out.regret ang guilt are things you need to deal with. go and see your GP and let he/she know how your feeling,they may suggest some counciling. you should deal with it soon the longer you feel this way the harder it will be to change it?
2006-09-15 06:04:25 · answer #10 · answered by one who has no name 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋