what can i do for my 13 year old son who can barely read?

Question

he tries to get himself suspended from school all the time. i am a single parent with no outside support. what can i do to help him before its too late & he does something he can't say sorry for?

Answer 1

I think you're smart to realize that getting suspended from school is related to not being able to read. He probably feels very stupid and self-conscious so it's easiest to avoid school by getting kicked out.

He may be dyslexic or have a learning disability. That doesn't mean he's stupid. In fact, many very smart people are/were dyslexic (including Albert Einstein!)

However, reading is a must-have skill in our society. The school counsellor should be able to arrange to get your son tested and get him the extra help he needs. He should also be able to help with finding funding.

Don't give up. Your son needs you on his side to help him get through this.

Answer 2

Try to keep him busy, boys need to have their days dictated for them and NEED to keep busy.

Get him involved in a sport so he doesn't have too much time for fighting or whatever else gets him suspended. And speak to him about the future. Find out what his goals are and help guide him toward that. And make sure that he has aspirations. Children don't dream these days but teach him that its not only health to do so but that his dreams can become a reality.

As far as academics goes, get him in an after school activity. In many public schools teachers are now required and/or willing to stay after school to tutor students. Also get him a big brother. Big brothers/big sisters help children with homework and give them someone to talk to. Also take trips to the library together. There are many activities at local libraries that aren't used enough. Also turn off the television and read a book of your own. He'll soon follow suit. And call 311. They can direct you to any free academic programs that are in your area.

And get him into a faith-based program. Combining faith and academics will help shift his focus from being idle to setting amibitions for himself.

I say all of this because of everything I have tried/am trying with my 16yo. We've gone through a lot but some of it is paying off. And try not to ever give up on him. It may be hard but don't think its too late for him to turn around and grow into a positive and successful young man.

Answer 3

Have you threw a hissy fit at his school yet? He probably has a learning disability that with proper treatment could solve his problems. Be his advocate! Make sure they have done the full spectrum of tests (they should all be free). After that if they say there's nothing wrong then take him to a learning center and have them test him. If they find something wrong then send the bill to the school! I would suggest sending it to the superintendent too! Throw a fit until they give him the special services he needs. This is too important to ignore.

To lead him down the right paths make sure he has appropriate after school activities to be involved in such as hobbies etc. Make sure there is a good male role model in his life such as a pastor, good Uncle, grandparent etc. Have them talk to him about the vast choices a young male has to make and their consequences.

Answer 4

you must act now by asking for all help you can. Ask for a learning assessment to see if there are any underling problems like dyslexia or ADHD that also a doctor and help with. Make the school aware that you are activiely seeking help and are willing to participate in any at risk programs they have, special tutoring, etc. Insist on help to see him succeed, ask for an action plan, ask what plan do they have to help your child towards success. Ask if they have anything good to say about yr son, and play that up as well. Sometimes teh negatives are played up too much in schools, where they feel more excitement to see kids fail it seems. Be persistent, like an advertising jingle that sticks in yr head. Dont be rude, but be present and let them know you aren't gving up, therefore they can't either. Local churches/synogogue or mosque whichever is yr preference may well hav e volunteers to help youth and also tutoring programs. Go to your library -its free and get learning aids-books for people to learn english or kids books that are lower than his age so he can build up his reading ability.Prise himf or any efforts and do not reinforce bad behaviour. Pull together any resources you can and stick to it. Relatives who are supportive or other strong wise support persons. You cnanot always prevent a kid from getting into trouble but you certainly want to feel you did yr best. Provide a good example, turn off TV as MUCH as possible,limit computer game time,let him see you reading so it's not a "do as i say not as i do" kinda situation. Keep all negatives away from him that you can control-no substances in the house. If you smoke or drink,or any other bad habits- quit or severely cut back while pursuing a goal of quitiing so he can see you are willing to make an effort to better yourself as well.Try to initaite healthy habits of eating and sleeping and influence him to do the same(no junk food in house etc) See if there is alocal boys and girls club or YMCA. They often have free or low cost programs for kids. Goodluck

Answer 5

2 things popped out in my mind when I read this. I'm not sure of your location but you could start looking into Sylvan Learning Centers and see if there is any by you. (we have a few locatons around here and they do a wonderful job! they did have a gaurntee to raise childs grades a full letter but not sure if that still applies haven't heard lately) but second please talk to him and get him into some counsling. My roomate had children (I wouldn't spank kids if they are not mine) her 12 yr old hit me with the basement door (picked it up and threw it at me) hit me over the head with the cordless phone and chased me and his sister onto the roof with a knife. ( I crawled downt the gutter ran to neighbors and called his P.O.) They came and got him. Please get him help. I don't want to see any child go through that. Get him help and talk to him often and show him you love him like I know you do!

Answer 6

wow, you need to go into butt whipping mode. I would kill my children if they did something like that to me. 13 years old is a little to late to help him with his reading, but get him some help from school or an outside teacher might help, but in the end it is up to your son and not you.

Answer 7

Well going to the polls and not voting republican may help others like you later.For nowyou are his only hope. Teach him to read. Be forceful Get the STEP manual read and practice it. The book has workable relationship building methods and if you are going to have an impact you will need a good relationship. Ask for help perhaps from pastors in your area. They may not be able to help themselves but they should find help if you press them.

Answer 8

1-What is your language?If English,there are lots of books for teaching English as a foreign language.Some of them focus on reading .There are some guides for the teacher of the book.
2- You can ask him to read story books or articles for you and pretend that you are too tired to raed.
3-Listen to his reading with interest .
4- Do not correct his mistakes immediately.

Answer 9

You have to talk it out with him, pacify him. Sit with him when he is studying, give him live examples of what he is learning, get CDs which deal with his education. Give him something as a reward if he does all his work. I think this should work.

Answer 10

he needs tutor, and some one on one attention