DON'T GET IT, I HAVE BEGGED FOR A INTIMATE RELATIONSHIP, SLEEPING IN SEPARATE ROOMS, NO SEX IN 2YRS., AFTER 33 YRS OF MARRIAGE, WHY? 99% SURE NO OTHER PERSON INVOLVED. NO BLINDERS !!!
WHY ANYONE WOULD WANT A NASTY,MEAN, VINDICTIVE,CRUEL AND A VERBAL ABUSIVE PERSON...ONLY ME ! ANY ANSWERS?
2006-09-09 21:21:39 · 20 answers · asked by daughterofanative 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I am separated from my wife but we can't seem to figure out what to do about it. Everyone will say, get out of there fast but sometimes it is difficult. Obviously, you have a big problem but if both of you want to fix it you can do it, but if one of you really want out then that is probably the answer.
In short you have to consider the situation, pray a lot if you like to pray, and then make some kind of move to repair the marriage or to get a divorce.
2006-09-09 21:25:34 · answer #1 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What keeps you there? Have you thought about leaving the relationship and moving forward in your life .. find your own happiness and a relationship that you deserve. No one should be in a loveless marriage .. nor one that is verbally abusive. If you want the relationship to work you will both need to seek counseling and in addition away to rekindle the passion back into it.
I wish you luck
Hugs from a Loving Mom to a Brilliant, as well as beautiful 8 year old Jared and Our Angel, Zachary (taken to soon but who will always remain in our heart) ~ Mel
2006-09-09 21:24:55 · answer #2 · answered by jaredsmommy2004 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No more sex? He must be suffering from erectile dysfunction. He must be feeling awful about himself. Have the two of you discussed this? Or do you know about it at least? He may be dissatisfied with himself and shows his anger on you. Remember the good times you had for 31 years? Any amount of begging now will not help - if he cannot get it up. You may discuss this matter with him openly but gently as if you understand - and you should. Read more about ED on the internet. Sex has a shelf life - if one cannot do it (especially the male) then it stops. But there are ways he can keep you satisfied, provided he comes to terms with his condition first. You will need to cooperate once he gets back to his old self. You may then consult a sexologist who will help to improve the situation. Good luck.
2006-09-09 22:16:54 · answer #3 · answered by someone 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You feel safe with him dear! Stay put! Be nice! and don't grumble....remember what God did to his own followers after delivering them from Egypt...he let them roam around the desert
in circles for complaining. Sorry Honey....Let your love of your life have his own bedroom, let him be nasty, mean and vindictive, cruel and verbally abusive....he will pay his debt...or he may turn around one day and apologize for failing you so misirably...but you are have been married this long and have your own room and have a whole house to avoid him completely! Why give it up...wherever you go it could be worse...you'd be alone! You still love this man...Be quiet! Don't complain! Don't grunt or show any disapproval...be sweet as honey at all times when you are around him be happy and sing and whistle and don't let him scare you...just keep being happy doing things that occupy your time that make you happy....If he thinks you are happy and only tries to make you misierable...remember act happy and unattached...if he pursues you in a loving way...respond carefully
sweet, gentle and kind...you will never get your man back unless you wise up and outsmart him! You caught him once...you can do it again...but be smarter than him...learn him, learn his habits.
Make sure you are not a door mat...be sure to be unavailable when he is around....let him miss you...don't leave him! You can go lay next to him after he is asleep and see what he does when he finds you next to him in his bed the next morning...but I bet you already tried that one....Be quiet as a mouse, do not let him know your pain! If he hasn't learned by now how important you are to him...just share the house in separate bedrooms...Go places
of the house and go to church...do not share your horrible story there either...you will drive people away from you as unhappy as you are. Just let God know there quietly...and be happy there and
grow as a Christian....Go home and read your Bible and grow as a Christian. Still be quiet...God has to do the work! And he can't do his work if everyone is grumbly! Bottom line...you don't leave him...ever! He can leave you...You let him leave...but don't you leave...if he leaves...so what now you can turn his room into somehting else....even rent it out! Ha! Stay so you don't loose your home! God has a plan but if you can not find peace and searve Him for your grief what good are you to Him that way?
Keep yourself busy doing things and just be happy sing hymns!
2006-09-09 21:45:15 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
It sounds to me like you are just comfortable and too afraid to move on to a solid relationship. Is there a medical problem that is the reason for not having sex? If not then you need to figure out if this is where you want to be. Everyone deserves to be happy.
2006-09-09 21:28:52 · answer #5 · answered by nana_bad_ass 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wouldn't have sex with a nasty,mean,vindictive,cruel and verbal abusive person. So, I guess I can't help you here!
2006-09-09 21:40:42 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
My only question is: Why have u allowed for this situation to fester for so long? It sounds like u don't have much of a marriage anymore. If your partner is not willing to work on this with u, why stay and be unhappy?
2006-09-09 21:39:08 · answer #7 · answered by cheetah7 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I had a friend whose parents slept in separate beds. He turned out a little weird. His mother had a picture of the Pope and was very Catholic. His father was...not...He is strange. You stay together because you don't know any better I guess.
2006-09-09 21:25:54 · answer #8 · answered by want it bad 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Move out girl and get a normal life with plenty of happy sex.
A man whos abusive is no one to have for a partner..
2006-09-09 21:24:28 · answer #9 · answered by satnee2003 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh my lovely, don't waste another precious second of your life on this man. I assume he is a man.
We only get one shot and at this life and you appear to have wasted more than enough time on him. Move on! Do it soon - he's a waste and will never amount to anything. GO! Start packing now!
2006-09-09 21:29:10 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋