my husband keeps going out and leaving me home with the kid and i told him that its not fair to me for him to go out and leave me home i dont know anyone here we just moved and he keeps coning me in to letting him go out some times hes out till 3 in the morning he says that he is going to find someone to watch our daughter but never does so what should i do ?
2006-09-09 17:36:34 · 17 answers · asked by gigglezdelight 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
sometimes he comes home drunk
2006-09-09 17:41:40 · update #1
Dont be there when he comes home.....
2006-09-09 18:00:14 · answer #1 · answered by ABBYsMom 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
OK lady...you are a door mat! If you like being a doormat just stay at home and watch things get even worse...If you want to change...then get a job...get a babysitter...get a life that takes up so much of your time that he will perhaps understand that your
needs are as great as his own...then perhaps not anyway...get up and take charge of your life and quit being a door mat! So you are in a new place...so what...get a job and get a life! Maybe then when you are home you will be too tired to miss the idiot you married! Since he is doing this there is not much hope that he would seek counseling and already he either does not care about your needs or you are too much of a door mat to voice them. God
consecrated your marriage...but if he is not being adulterous and he is not beating you...then get smart! Get busy doing things that you truly enjoy...and give your knees some bending time and pray that God will lead your husband in the right direction to better lead his family!
2006-09-10 00:50:33 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
i could just imagine how difficult that has been for you... well straight off ...what your husband's doing is wrong and it has not just become a matter that he's not thinking of you and your feelings..... what's worst is what message he's sending to your daughter.Coming home 3 in morning it doesn't matter how young she is she is smart enough to know when Mom and Dad aren't agreeing especially over not being able to get a babysitter....You need to change your angle and don't let it seem that it's about you wanting to go out as well but doing things as a family and being careful of the message sent to your kid... As small as these matters may seem at first they turn out to be the ones to tear families apart. ...because after a while you are going to get annoyed about his behavior ... and the fact that you are in a new place and have to depend on him to protect the interest of the you and your daughter makes it worst... a receipt for trouble ... you really need to sit him down seriously and let him know what the consequences and reality may turn out to be ....
2006-09-10 01:00:28 · answer #3 · answered by adleon 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You're absolutely right. You shouldn't have to deal with this childish behavior. Here's how I'd handle it if I were in your place:
Open the yellow pages and look under "Attorneys". Once you find one that handles divorces, call and set up an appointment. Have your consultation, then sit your husband down and explain to him that either he starts acting like a husband and father or he'll be on the losing end of a divorce settlement that entails lots of child support, alimony, etc. If he straightens up, then congrats. If not, proceed with the divorce and clean him out.
Good luck.
2006-09-10 01:00:58 · answer #4 · answered by Tiberius 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get yourself fixd up and ready, when he comes home tell him that he can stay home with the kid you are going out if he tells you that he wanted to go out tell him to find someone to watch them and leave. Make him feel what you are feeling and maybe his perspective will change a bit. If you dont want to do that try finding someone on your own and when you do you will have someone to watch your kid when he wants to go out and you want to go with him, then he wont have any excuses as to not wnating you to go have your bases covered. Stay strong
2006-09-10 00:42:47 · answer #5 · answered by tiggerluvnmom 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you should try again to talk with your husband, try to get him to realize how you feel about him leaving you. Then get involved in some kind of activities maybe you can meet some people . I know its hard to be in a new place where you no no one but you have to try to make a go of it. just be strong and change will come
2006-09-10 00:41:03 · answer #6 · answered by Agape4God 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'd pack my things and move me and my kid back home to my family and tell hubby when he grows up come find us and he'd be damn lucky if I still wanted him then. He wants to run the streets and act like a fool then more power to him but I would take responsibilty for my kid.
2006-09-10 00:47:59 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Go to the nearest laundramat or grocery store and look at the bulletin board for babysitters. Or, call any church and ask for a kid wanting to earn a few bucks. Then, tell hubby you'll go with him.
2006-09-10 00:44:11 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Where is he going until 3 in the morning?
You have to put your foot done. You are in a relationship TOGETHER which means the two of you should be together.
I would not trust a man that is out until 3am.
2006-09-10 00:40:02 · answer #9 · answered by sarah071267 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ask your neighbors if they know of a good babysitter or put up a sign at a local church or HS. Hire her and get out of the house. I would be very suspicious of your husband, if I were you. He is up to no good at 3AM.
2006-09-10 00:40:08 · answer #10 · answered by notyou311 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would find a online community for your city to meet other moms, and from there make friends and then you will have friends and a possible mom to swap with for babysitting:)
2006-09-10 00:40:22 · answer #11 · answered by slambertjane 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋