My boyfriend and I have seperated. We have a 6 month old child and I am wondering what kind of an affect it will have on her when her daddy only sees her at times for 15 to 20 minutes in a day or does not see her for a day or two. Is there any emotional or pychological affects?
2006-09-09 16:02:24 · 7 answers · asked by mom 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
As long as she knows her daddy loves her, and if he keeps his promises (ie: I promise to take you to the zoo for your birthday), then it won't be too bad. I know it is hard when parents seperate, my own seperated when i was 4, and It was really hard, but that was mainly because my mom took off w/us and I wasn't able to see my dad for almost 2 years. So be sure not to do that...
Since she's younger, it won't be nearly as hard for her, but make sure to let and encourage them seeing each other. It will make her think that she is cared for and that her dad wants to see her. And also be sure to let her know what is going on as she grows up, that way when she's 3 or 4 she doesn't figure out what it means from someone else. And remember not to tear her dad down around her, either. That way she doesn't grow up hating him. My mom tried to do that w/me... It's not fun.
2006-09-09 16:06:51 · answer #1 · answered by Princess J9 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
From the parenting classes my ex-husband and I took when we got divorced, we learned that the younger the child, the more stressful the divorce/seperation. The youngest children KNOW something is different, but they cannot understand it or verbalize their feelings. Keep in mind a 6 month old child is very attentive to you and your feelings and your moods. Your child will pick up your stress and anxiety and not understand it or know how to process it.
You need to come to an agreement on a "Parenting Plan" with your ex-boyfriend. It's important that the two of you agree up front (and in writing). Check to see if there are any family mediation services (usually free or inexpensive), family counseling and support services, or divorce parenting classes (often mandatory for divorce or custody cases in family court in many states) in your area. He may be your ex-boyfriend, but he will always be the father of your child.
Try reading books. "Helping Your Kids Cope with Divorce the Sandcastles Way" by M. Gary Neuman or "What About the Kids? Raising Your Children Before, During, and After Divorce" by Judith S. Wallerstein and Sandra Blakeslee. My children, especially my daughter loved "Two Homes" by Claire Masurel (a children's book). These are avilable at Amazon.com or should be at your local library.
Remember, this is affecting your child. The more you do to help your child the easier it will be for both of you in the future. GOOD LUCK!!!
2006-09-09 16:23:34 · answer #2 · answered by LasVegasMomma 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The better question would be "What would the emotional effect be on a six month old child who lived with parents who didn't want to be together"? "How would it effect a child psychologically if she lived with parents who were fighting all the time".
If two people are not happy together, how can they expect a baby to be happy. It is best that you separate if you don't want to be together but you must both agree to teach the child to love the other parent no matter what. A child does not need to know if a father cheated on her mother or a mother cheated on her father. Make sure that you talk nicely about your ex and to him when you are in front of her. And make sure that your ex does the same. The important thing here is the child and making sure that he or she grows up to be a happy child who respects and loves both her parents.
Love this child and make sure he or she is happy and confident in your love and your exes.
2006-09-09 16:10:08 · answer #3 · answered by nellie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
According to my wife who raised her kids for the first 4 years of thier life and has lots of education in child development. There is no adverse affect. If there is a lot of fighting going on around the child they might come to connect the loud angry voices to bad feelings and that may create a problem. Try not to have fights around the kids. I can tell you from my own past that seeing mom and dad fight is not fun. When the father is not around, never bad mouth him. No matter how mad you are at him do not belittle him. Try to give a positive front to the seperation. Good luck.
2006-09-09 16:08:23 · answer #4 · answered by asbratcher 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
even as he turns 2, i will initiate affirming his age in years. right this moment, I continually say the month, yet then persist with up with "he will be 2 in January" so no one has to do the mathematics :) even as he change into 17 months, i'd say "he will be a year and a million/2 next month"!! variety of ingredient. My son is 21 months previous today!!!! rattling, time flies.
2016-10-15 23:51:00 · answer #5 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She won't have any effects from it...Babies have short memories but she will remember her daddy if he visits her , even if its only for a few minutes
2006-09-09 16:05:07 · answer #6 · answered by Mrs. M 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
none. It's best you seperated when she is so young. Dont' worry about it.
2006-09-09 16:04:11 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋