I'm 42/m/married w/2 kids why am I so miserable?

Answer 1

You're 42, married, 2 children.

Answer 2

We are all different.

Some of us are naturally happy, some sad, some miserable, some depressed, some bubbly etc. It's all to do with something called genes.

If you are one of these unhappy types, I feel really sorry for you especially if you have kids.

Maybe that's why you're unhappy?
Maybe you didn't really want any. Not everyone does.
If this is the case, I can assure you that they do eventually grow up and leave home. There is a light at the end of the tunnel.

Maybe you don't love your wife anymore.
Well, you'll have to sort that one out for yourself.

However, the main reason people feel miserable is because they have no interests or friends.

If this is the case, these days, with the Internet there is no excuse. Simply type in "clubs" and the name of your town into the search engine and you'll find all that you need. You can narrow it down even further if you like by typing "Tennis Clubs" or "Social Clubs" or whatever takes your fancy.

There's an awful lot of things going on out there, you know.
Make sure you are part of it all.

Answer 3

I'm an RN, and I wonder a little more about your relationships with your children and your wife. Have there been any significant changes lately that have brought on these feelings?? If not, I would consult your doctor and tell him/her how you are feeling and how often you feel this way. It's possible that you're depressed. If the doctor chooses to give you anti-depressants, definitely follow up with counseling. If your insurance doesn't cover counseling, call your local Department of Human Services and they can help. Possibly even your place of work's HR department can help you. Usually they have something in place. Don't feel alone, everyone goes through periods of feeling miserable. I was literally miserable for 6 months and on a variety of anti-depressants, but was misdiagnosed. I have social anxiety disorder which they confused with depression. Make sure you make your symptoms very clear. Even I as an RN goofed... Now that I'm on the right medication and seeing counseling, which I was seeing before, I feel so much better. You will too - and you'll be amazed you let it go so long before you sought help. It's not a sign of weakness, it means you're normal! Good luck with it!

Answer 4

It is time for you to travel... Take the family and move to Budapest... I hear it's great there. And I'm sure they have plenty of schools hungry for people to teach English. The kids can enroll in an online school.

This is what I did, except, we went to China. They pay the foreign teachers a ton more than normal Chinese people there. And they gave us a free apartment and free services.

All we had to do was play games with the kids, and help them with their English...

We all loved it... You have no idea what it's like to be able to go out on the town every night. With what we were paid by the school, we owned the city... And they looked at us almost as if we were rockstars...

Answer 5

Because you look at your wife and don't see that amazing, sexy, fun woman you fell in love with. You go to work at a job that pays the bills, but doesn't inspire you. You have no challenging and interesting hobbies. You spend too much time on-line and not enough time taking your children and wife to any place fun. You see life is getting near the middle and you haven't accomplished what you think you should have. You are bored.

Look, instead of spending so much time on-line, go take your wife and somewhere nice. If she is fat or out of shape ask her to start going to a gym with you to work out. Start taking your kids places more often. Get out of that house and start bonding again with your family before it is too late.

OR take a trip to the Philippines and fall in love with an 22 year old sexy, fun girl and leave your wife and kids. But be ready for lawyer fees, child support, alimony, loss of friends and respect in your family and community, and fake love from the young girl. If you take this path, I am pretty sure you will regret it. I sure know I do.

Answer 6

Perhaps you two have stopped thinking about the things you fell in love over in the first place...before the kids came along.
Take a vacation with just your wife, doing something you both love commonly (ie beach, mountains) and reconnect. Then take a long weekend with just you and the kids to get into what's going on with them. You'll be more opened to them and relaxed and willing to do more fun things with them.
No one ever said marriage OR parenthood was a cup of tea, but you can always add a little sugar to the cup to make it sweeter. Love is the answer, my friend.

Answer 7

Not enough information. You would need to provide far more information, such as what you do for a living, the area of the country in which you live, any major changes, even any minor changes.

Likely, you are having regrets about something which you have failed to perform to your satisfaction. Sometimes it is something long term (unhappy with your job, wanting more for your children, etc.), but it usually something short term, like a change at work, or even just diet or exercise changes.

Answer 8

i think you and your wife need to go on a trip together and chill a little. have some fun and unwind. fine a babysitter for your kids. when you work all the time it will do it to you. try going on a trip maybe you will feel better and not so miserable.

Answer 9

Because the kids are teenagers?

Some may say it's because there is a God shaped hole in your heart and you've been trying to fill it with the love of your spouse & kids. Try filling it with God's love and keep your spouse love and kid love in their own special places of your heart.

Don't expect other people to make you happy. Find happiness with them not from them. Do things together that, both you & your spouse enjoy (not sex) and share the joy of those things with your kids. Example: I learned to love plants and nature because my parents shared that with each other and showed me the joy of it. As I've done that with my spouse & kids, it has brought me much happiness. Share the joy with others and their smiles will bring you satisfaction and happiness. (Well, sure, you should share the joy of sex with your spouse, but you don't share that with others, especially not the kids.)

Answer 10

You have to search your soul to see what it really need not what you want. Do you live your life as your real self or as your
as illusion of what you pretend to be life by the world social standards. You have to be you to please yourself and live as
GOD advise you. Don't judge your life base on material accomplishments. Judge yourself on values of respect for your family, friends and people of all colors. Live you life within your true gifts given to you at birth, you will find happiness and sucess if you take advantage and use your giftsto accomplish want you looking for in life you will see that GOD is good and will lead you will wisdom. Don't base your worth on the world standard of materialism and you will discover a new spirt in you which is your true self. Follow the advice of that real GODLY sprit and live your life to the fulless and don't fear life.