Is it common for transsexuals to get really depressed?

Question

I'm not depressed because I've transitioned, I'm depressed because of the change. It's the treatment now, the way gender plays SUCH an important role in society whether we realize it or not (which most don't because they take such a thing like gender for granted) as well as embarassment in certain situations, like dating, restrooms, medical records, ect... is it common to get depressed, but not be depressed over the decision? I really have started isolating myself more and more and I just don't even want to be around people anymore. Is it normal to feel like you just want to die? Please, I really need some serious replies, I need to know that I'm not alone in this..

Answer 1

Bohemianboi,
I can relate to everything you say, and yes it happens to the rest of us too. But it is worth remembering that, because of our own dysphoria, it is easy to assume it all boils down to the gender dichotomy. Society is constricting and controlling in so many more ways, culturally, religiously, politically, etc. I think anyone who has any world-awareness cannot help but feel that way about this from time to time.
Ultimately this is not something we chose to have to deal with and, good though treatment is now, we are still a long way of creating the ability to complete the reproductive component of transition, such that what we really achieve is more an aesthetic palliation rather than a cure.
So yes, there is reason, justifiable reason, to feel down from time to time. Societal prejudice is just another kick in the teeth we often never quite shake off. But you are never alone, and you have been through worse and survived. Try looking at it another way to put a more positive light on things:
You are experiencing life from both sides of the gender divide and that is, whatever anyone else says, a truely unique experience and something that cannot help but be enlightening as to the true restrictions of society. That is often why people who transition expecting it to free them find the societal expectations on their new gender role can feel restrictive too. Sometimes that cause people to "de-transition", others to find an assexual social role, but most of us find despite that we are happier in the gender-congruent role we always needed.
I do feel for you and hope what I say gives some solace at least. The bottom line is you can only be true to yourself, the rest of society will always try and pidgeon-hole us into one or other of a number of over-simplistic categories to help them cope with the fact that they really don't understand what we experience, and need to feel they can do by making unfounded inferences.
Social change has to come through education and unity amongst our community, each individual is but a spark in the darkness, by the time they are noticed, they have gone. Collectively those sparks may create a brightness that remains long enough to be recognised.

Answer 2

If you never were depressed before transition then you never where transexual. I mean what caused you to change? Also if you transitioned and you are depressed now then you never where transsexual and now you are. In other words you shouldn't have changed. Not because I am Bigoted but becuase I have researched this kind of behavior just to know what it is before I judge people on it (not saying I do judge anyone anyways). So you have a choice of spending a lot of money to TRY to change back. or you can live the rest of your life depressed because you made a mistake. Lastly, if you feel like you want to die then you are now transsexual when you weren't (as in pre-transition). Which is why I've learned from an actual transsexual that is 16 years post-op and is happy that when I start the hormones that I monitor if I like that or not.

Answer 3

There's lots of things that can cause depression. Take some time to figure out what the problem is and try to come up with a solution to it. If you thikn it might be related to your transitio, it might be that you're though some of those highs of moving forward with your life and now that you're so far, you have nothing ahead of you. If that's the case, you might want to try some soul-searching and looking around for other things to do with your time and life. It's easy to get so focused on transitioning that that becomes your life. I struggle with depression my self from a long list of causes. One of the ways that I battle it is by simply forcing myself to get up and get out there. Meet new people and try new things! Live healthy and active, and it should help with the depression. Talking to people can help too. Of course, there are also chemical causes like chemical imbalances in the brain and *certain medications.* Find what's causing it and fight it. Rember, you're not alone in this. Lots of people struggle with depression, especially transpeople. We're always here to support each other and are here for you.

Answer 4

You are not alone - - - it is difficult when one knows that they are 'right,' that the decision to pursue a lifestyle viewed as 'alternative' is challenged by Society each & every day in every imaginable way. One can be depressed simply answering the same 'stupid' questions again & again, often from well meaning friends - - - 'why are you' or a variant. This might sound 'odd' but stop being Embarrased. Just stop it - - - you know what restroom is right for you, go i with confidence, let your stride & stance say 'this is where I belong' be strong, if other people are uncomfortable, that is their problem. You must be confident in order to gain confidence to gain the confidence of others. Learn to 'shout'' "this is Me, Get Over It." Peace.....

Answer 5

Are you saying you have completed the transition? Surgery and all? No it is not normal to get depressed. The people that I know who have gone through this ususally DON"T feel depressed for the first time in their lives because they have the body they thought they should always have. Sounds like you might have other issues going on. Hope you find ways to work it out.

Answer 6

Yes, very common. That is why the Harry Benjamin guidelines are in place, to make really sure that the people who make the change are really sure. It isn't easy, and you shrink needs to get to know you really good, a year or two at least, because they all know how really hard it is going to be. Did you catch the word really? A transsexual that does not ever get depressed is insane. It is part of the territory before, it is part of the territory after. Stay close to people who can help.

Answer 7

Darlin, yes, it's quite normal.
Many factors play a part in depression..and even more in a transgender having depression. The hormones themselves can cause depression, pressures from friends, relatives or co-workers...society in general.
Yes, it's very normal, but I'd really suggest seeking treatment. Many forms of depression can be treated quite succesfully, some even can be cured.
Seek treatment.

Love and blessings....

Answer 8

Yes it's normal but try not to let yourself feel so down, I know your going threw a lot and I really feel for you. In the past I've suffered from depression and I found the best way to get my self out of it is to allow yourself to feel these feelings for a limited time per day then get your self out and go on with your life and try to be happy.. I hope this helps, stay strong..........

:)

Answer 9

Yes it is very commen my daughter is preop and gets very depressed about many things. I try very hard to be as supportive as possible. But sometimes a mom just isn't enough. Luckly she is in a very happy relationship now and that is a lot. Try to hang in there.

Answer 10

I know exactly how you feel, but I'm not a transexual at all. I have social anxiety so I feel like people are thinking about me like that all the time, and I isolated myself too. It's ahorrible thing to go through, but some people definatly understand what you're going through so please get through it!