I'm 18 and want a baby! I think i'm ready?

Question

My boyfriend and I have been together for 3 years. I love kids and have always wanted a baby. Even though there is a lot of responsibility in having a baby, I think that I will still be able to handle college. I am in my first year and am only going for 2 years. I want to have my baby in the summer so it is possible to handle school. I think that I am all around ready to take on the responsibility and have given it a lot of thought. However; I want some opinions.

Answer 1

I am 28 and I want a baby...and have been saying so since I was about 20...but I had this whole idea that I wanted a ring and a mortgage first...(hence why I am 28 with no baby!)

Anyway, for the first time I realized that I am really ready to have a baby, and it dawned on me that if I had one...my freedom is really over. Even the idea of just jumping in the car and going to the store changes...cuz now there would be a baby that would either need to come with me or be looked after by someone. AND daycare is really really expensive...(I am not sending my kid just anywhere!) I am a person who loves to pick up a partime job every now and then when I need extra cash. That would have to stop...or would not be so easy to do. Plus, I really like sleep...and don't get much as it is. I would have to wake up for my kid. SO...at 28 I want a baby, but am not sure I am ready.

by the way, I have a Masters Degree.
I know I would make a great mom...I just don't know if I WANT to make those sacrifices that a kid needs you to make just yet. Make sure you are ready to make those sacrifices cuz babies grow up to be able to talk, and the last think you need 18 years from now is your child telling you about yourself.

All babies are blessings, but you owe it to your baby to be financially and emotionally secure before you jump into the idea of having one. (College is really expensive (not yours, but theirs.)and 18 years is not as far away as you think!)

Answer 2

Concerning a child's life... Whenever you say "boyfriend" and "I THINK I can." You should decide, from that, for the baby... not for you, to wait.

When it comes to children, you will, and should ALWAYS come last. There is no more I, it is we.

The decision is best made under an umbrella of financial stability and mental and emotional maturity.

Guys don't stay forever, school doesn't last forever but a baby does last forever and if I had it to do all over again, even though I adore my children and love the life we have... I would have liked to have given them what they deserved, not what we (at the time) could manage.

Think about it... You have until you are 40 now days to have a healthy, normal pregnancy less the risk factors. Finish school, get married (if that's where you want to go) or in the very least, have a dedication mock wedding ceremony and tie SOME kind of knot to assume some kind of dedication to one another. It is not old fashioned and it is not stupid...

My suggestion for the BABY would always be to wait.

Answer 3

i imagine you need to attend a minimum of two years. bypass shuttle the international for a lengthy time period and stay a touch. once you've a baby now you're apologetic about it in ten years time. surely because you'll imagine "I want i had gotten to do more desirable with my existence before having a baby". i'm 23 and nevertheless imagine i possibly might want to of waited a 365 days or so basically to get my head proper and do some more desirable issues first. i recognize being a mummy and love my little female with all my coronary heart. She replaced into deliberate yet that does no longer propose i replaced into totally prepared for what replaced into to come back. little ones are an total time ingredient so that you truly want to imagine lengthy and confusing to even if you may have sufficient money it financially and emotionally. sturdy success with what ever you make certain. Joanna D: I trust you about the marriage ingredient. I ain't married and we are truly satisfied to stay that way till we may be able to have sufficient money it. except you're non secular then i see no want in being married to have a baby.

Answer 4

The worst thing you can do is put unnecessary strain on yourself while you are focusing on an already major life change such as college. Babies consume time, energy and expenses. It's great that you want to have one but you should really wait until you're finished with college and have a stable enough family life to be prepared for most financial scenarios.

You're one of the lucky ones. You're actually making a conscious choice to wait or go through with having a child at this crucial time in your life. Hold those positive feelings, and wait until you're properly set in a career and family life.

Also, while some people don't want to hear this, it might be a good idea to wait until you and your boyfriend are married. While I'm sure the two of you are madly in love, marriage will somewhat prove his willingness to be with you from the child's birth to adulthood, or make him legally responsible should he decide to flee.

Answer 5

Well, I had a baby when i was 18, and at the time, i thought i was doing a pretty good job and thought i was responsible enough. But now that im 24, and i had another baby last september, I can tell you that i am a much better parent, and I wish i could have done alot of things different with my first child. My advice is, wait till your atleast 22 or 23.

Answer 6

Uh, how about getting married first for starters? Everything in your post is "I". I this, I that. There is no mention as to whether your boyfriend is ready to take on this committment. Start by asking yourself these questions: Are you ready to go through nine months of pregnancy and morning sickness which include sore breasts, swollen feet/ankles and vomiting? Are you ready to go through the pain of labor? What if your labor is not progressing satisfactorily - are you ready to have a C-section, which is major surgery? Are you ready to put your baby first 100% of the time and everything else second? Are you ready to be responsible for a baby 24/7 instead of going out with your friends? How willing is your boyfriend going to be in helping you with the baby - feeding it, changing its diaper, watching the baby occasionally so that you can have a break, etc. or will the whole responsibility fall on you while he goes out with his friends? At 18 years of age are you and your boyfriend financially able to provide everything that this baby will need? How are you going to handle being pregnant AND going to college? What about after you finish college and start looking for a job - are you going to want/be able to afford to put your baby in daycare while you work? Are you willing to have endless nights of interrupted sleep from a baby that hasn't learned to sleep through the night yet? Are you willing to walk the floor at night (in the middle of the night) with a sick, crying baby, worried half out of your mind because your baby is running a fever and you don't know exactly what is wrong? When the baby gets older, will you be financially able to afford glasses or braces for it if necessary? What about a college education - is that something you will be able to afford? What if the baby is born with a medical condition that requires extensive medical treatment - are you ready for that responsibility? My grandson had to have surgery when he was only 4 weeks old - are you ready for that if something like that should happen to your baby? (Hopefully, it will not). I would suggest that you finish college first - it will be so much easier to finish college if you are not pregnant or worrying about your baby. Then if you still think you want a baby, consider getting married first. However, I think you have already answered your question as to whether you are ready or not - if you really WERE ready, you would not be on here asking for everyone else's opinion unless you had some doubts. Best of luck to you in whatever you decide to do.

Answer 7

my best friend felt the same way, so i had her come and stay with me on spring break. for two weeks i watched her try to take care of my angel. i only butted in when she was crying (which was often). i am so glad to here that you have a boyfriend, but coming from some one who had a baby when she was 18 and had a boyfriend i can tell you that he will not be emotionally ready. do you really think that he will want to stay home all the time and help you take care of junior. if you want to break up the the guy than go ahead and have the baby. i am not meaning to sound cynical but men are self-centered and lie allot. please Waite till you are at least married. i have been a single mom of 5. divorced 2 times and are about to married agen. all of my x-husbands cheated on me while i was pregnant but this one. at least get through with school first. my mother always told me that you are to be able to take care of yourself, and whoever you bring into the world by you self. make sure that you are able to do everything by yourself with out your boyfriend. P.S. i haven't been able to leave my House for more than 4 hours in 9 years. do you relay want this life.

Answer 8

I got pregnant, my senior year in high school, just three months after I graduated I gave birth to my daughter. At first I was very excited, I thought it was like dressing up a doll or something, but now my daughter is growing up, she is now thirteen, and I see that I should have waited till I was a little older, cause it it hard now a days to raise children, not to mention expensive. I am now married with three children, and all I do is work all day. I know that I don't want that for my daughter, I would want her to finish school and make something of herself first, so she won't have any thoughts about "what if." I hope this might help you make the right choice for yourself.

Answer 9

Please-1) consult with your boyfriend-is he okay with the idea? 2) Is he working? 3) Who would take care of the baby while you are in school, and the dad is working? Daycare costs for infants are really high. 4) What about when you complete your college? Are you going to work as well? What about paying off the loans for your schooling?
consider your schooling to be completed, and the loans paid off first.
Also, it is truly the best for you as the Mom, to stay home with your child-a former supervisor of mine, when my son was 6 mos. old, told me to stay home with him for the first three years of his life. He needed me. That is so true. As a mom, you are needed to meet every need that baby has-diaper changes, feedings (can be every two hours and at first growth spurt once an hour). If and when the baby does not feel good-a baby feels better with Mom there to hold and cuddle with. One daycare I checked on when my son was under one yr. old-told me I had to provide the formula, diapers, clothes (if needed changing), food (baby food) each day for him. I opted to listen to my former supervisor. I am happy I did. I wanted to be a Mom at your age too, but I'm happy I waited-motherhood is so wonderful! I have the little bit more patience needed, and the maturity too. Also, consider, what if you and some of your friends want to go out and go to the park for a picnic, go to the mall to shop, just hang out together? You are only young once-having a baby can wait awhile longer. it will be worth it. Honest. take care.

Answer 10

Do you have your own place, can you both pay your own bills? Or are you going to use the state to help you out and that includes all of us who pay our taxes. Sorry but we don't want to par for your baby, if you can do it on your own that's great but if you are going to use the state to help then please wait till you are ready we don't want to help raise your child. Better make sure you guys have good jobs and full time ones that don't pay minimum wage or work part time. Have you also talked with your bf he has to be willing to help. So what if you have been together for three years. It doesn't matter how long you have been together is whether or not both of you are willing to take on the responsibilities. Remember your young so no eating out alot, going to parties alot no, fancy 700$ car payment. Just rethink and rethink hard.