I really do not have any family or friends, and my wife, whom was my only friend is gone. I am finding the pain increasing because I am reliving our life in my head. I went back 12 years ago to when we first met and I can't seem to stop. Day by day, in my head and it is causing so much hurt and pain for I really do love my wife so much, I really do. It is my fault that she left, I neglected her, didn't spend time with her, I didn't show her that I really loved her, (I think because I didn't realize that I had so much love in my heart for her). She has always been a truly wonderful person and I was an idiot. I never beat her or cheated on her or yelled at her but I abused her through neglect, which I now regret so much. If she ever has it in her heart to forgive me, I have learned a valuable lesson and I will treat her like the queen that she deserves to be treated like. I can't seem to deal with this pain it is so hard. She is a good woman and I care for her a great deal and I miss her
2006-09-09 08:40:37 · 18 answers · asked by sharkscue 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
If it is meant to be it will be,,My husband and I were married for 22 years we met when we were 17 he was my best friend in the world we have 3 kids togeather.After the first 2 moved out things seemed to change things just were not exciting as they once were.We ended up seperating .He seemed so cool about it untill I figured it was over and started dating someone else that is when he realized he dident want this.For months after he was coming over telling me how much he loved me and how he dident want to loose me, we started from the beginning again he would come over and take me out to dinner then go home,we went to movies, festivals,it gradually brought the excitment back into are relationship.We have been back togeather for 2 years now and things are better then ever you dont realize what you have till it gone.we learned alot.Maybe you should ask her out to dinner and dont push her show her a good time and gradually let her know how much you really do love her and appreciate her ..good luck..Dont expect miracles over night it took awhile for this to happen and it is going to take time to bring it back..
2006-09-09 13:30:46 · answer #1 · answered by lynda p 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
you need to take a breathe i is going to hurt but sitting around reliving it is not the answer
make yourself go do something when you start thinking about it make a conscious effort to focus thought on something else
go to a bar and strike up a conversation with other people you do not know
go to the gym and workout
get a good book and read go to the movies
stay active try something new something you have never done before
but as hard as it is this is part of it and you will get over it if you put forth the effort
and next time you meet a girl you know what to do
2006-09-09 15:49:53 · answer #2 · answered by someone 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well coming from a wife of neglect, I understand what she was feeling. Did you ever open up and talk with her communication is one of the most important things in any relationship and if you do not have that then you were basically roommates. Did she ask you to open up to her. First take some time for yourself to get yourself together then show her that you are ready for a relationship, not by words but by actions. Be real with yourself and you will find it easier to be real with your wife. I pray blessing on your life, your marriage and your wife
2006-09-10 00:31:34 · answer #3 · answered by Agape4God 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Well, the best advice I can give you, if any, is to say a long prayer and ask God to forgive you for how you treated the wife he gave you. Then ask Him to make a way for her to find it in her heart to forgive you. If you are sincere, 'cause He knows, and that is what His will is, then it will be so. Whatever you do, don't beat yourself up about it, just make sure that you have learned from your mistakes, because if you don't get back with her, and someone better comes along, you sure better know what, and what not to do! I hope this helps.
2006-09-09 15:56:39 · answer #4 · answered by mrchozen 1 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Everyone makes mistakes.... she is human too! You did'nt really say anything about her feelings. Have you talked to her? If you love her; she'll know! She will feel it! You need to give her time at first; then maybe send a letter or email. Take it easy. If there is'nt a third party involved; she'll respond. You sound very sincere and genuine! She will know if you are'nt. Don't focus on what you did wrong; but what you are going to do right. You love her; so do what you have to!
2006-09-09 21:20:30 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Dude...its not the end of the World..really!! The emptiness you feel or void in your Life can be filled with other forms of entertainment....you owe it to yourself to re-energize something you liked to do before like a sport or maybe hobby you gave up...Don't throw yourself into a pit of despair...it will act like quicksand and consume your very soul.....If your Ex-Wife was your true Love it will turn around someway , somehow, ...naturally...dint dwell on it....your actions or neglect will ignite the flames within her too.....give her time to heal over the disappointment ....she also failed you by not staying with you and working it out...dont you think??? The Old saying time heals all wounds is very true...believe me Ive been thru it too!!!
2006-09-09 15:53:42 · answer #6 · answered by fxbeto 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i doubt it was only the neglect...after being with someone for over 12 years...if the both of you were that close then she should have been able to talk to you about all her problems...
However, i dont know what could have been going through her mind and what is at the present time...do you know where she has gone? If so, send her gifts...serenade her outside the window with some guitar, banjo players or a couple of violinists...
If it really meant something to her, she will come back...but give her sometime to make her own decision as well as letting her know you are there to welcome her back with loving arms!
2006-09-09 15:49:01 · answer #7 · answered by Patience 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
It is going to be ok, trust me .I loved my ex with all my heart and after 20 years of marriage and me being a good wife he walk out on me and the kids .the pain was umbereable but it sure got better .Try to force yourself to do things ,go out meet new people ,find a hobbie, movies fishing etc.Do not stay at home just thinking and if you do remember the good memories .You have a good life ahead of you. It was her lost. Good luck!
2006-09-09 23:09:33 · answer #8 · answered by Alijoy 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
why do people never realise what they have untill its gone why dont you send her flowers and talk to her and try to win her back tell her you no you made mistakes and you really would like a chance to show her how much you love her tell her things wil be different but only tell her that if you really mean it good luck all the best i hope it works out for you
2006-09-09 15:46:51 · answer #9 · answered by angel 36 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If u know where she is, write her a letter explaining in details what u just told us here. U have to let her KNOW that u want her back because she's probably also waiting for u to show her that u actually want her back with u. So, what are u waiting for? Get her back!
2006-09-09 15:51:51 · answer #10 · answered by cheetah7 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋