Like my poem? I made it up right now!?

Question

That Feeling

Every once in a while,
I get that feeling,
That even as life goes on,
We will always be together.

That feeling where,
We know it will never be the same,
But I feel ecstatic just to move on,
How could it not stay the same?

That strange feeling,
That makes everyone feel like jumping once in awhile,
Just for being alive,
And not being able to wait for that reunion.

I feel that feeling now,
Do you sense it too?
It is as if things will always be the same,
With you, me, and all of us.

Feeling is a miracle,
Especially when we feel that feeling,
That I feel now,
Like life will change yet be the same.

We can always come back to each other,
This feeling will never die in us,
That crazy feeling that possesses me,
We will always be friends forever.

That feeling is in us,
And always will be,
Life has many meanings,
One being that feeling I have now of it always being alright.

Answer 1

Well i wrote poems too..so here is my opinion, its not whether anyone likes or dislikes it, to me personally, its from you and what you write is how you feel it is to you...a poem to me is like a journal, it tells you how you feel that day or what is in your heart or mind at the time...i am the type that writes poems that rhyme but also there is no wrong way in writing a poem, as long as there is a meaning to your poem, and the meaning is expressed in your own words...so to me, go for it, i think you brought your point across....

Answer 2

You use the words "feel" and "feeling" too many times and it gets redundant and boring. Also, when writing a poem, the title word doesn't usually show up in the poem. If it does, it only shows up at the end.

Then, there's your message. It's ambiguous. Unclear. You need to paint pictures for your reader with your words. Universal pictures that we can all relate to. What does your feeling looks like? Taste like? Smell like? Sound like?

Your poem seems to speak to a specific person, leaving the rest of us in the lurch. That's not very interesting to read. Include us by giving us something to hold onto to, to relate to in your poem. Tell us how we feel. Relate your feelings to ours.

The other problem is in blanket statements such as, "Life has many meanings," Of course life has many meanings. How else could you say that without appearing so cliche? Avoid blanket statements and cliches at all costs. If you're not sure, read it back to yourself and ask yourself if what you wrote came out of your own imagination or if it's an idea you heard somewhere before.

Writing is about thinking. Writing poetry is about the sparse use of words and thoughts. Then, stringing them together in an elegant way. You've got a little work to do.

PS. It doesn't really help to have someone like kittyrogers blast you off the page, either. There is a middle ground. If your going to bother answering the question, kitty, why not give her some constructive critcism. Especially, since you're a professional. You just give ALL editors a bad name.

Answer 3

Dear, this is not the forum for your little poems. Reported. Poetry is all about imagery and this isn't it. This is awful. Good poetry is very difficult to write and you either have a flair for it or you don't. You don't. And if you MUST write it, don't do it when you are depressed or have just broken up with someone. It shows and painfully. Try something else. And aksing other little children here what they think is like asking them how to do brain surgery. THEY DON'T KNOW and many wouldn't know good poetry from bad. And dear, this is BAD!

Answer 4

This poem is so redundant. Feeling, feeling, feeling. It kind of got boring after awhile.

Answer 5

YOU HAVE A MADE A VERY CHARMING GIFT,
TO ALL OF US.

SLIGHT REVISIONS, MAY PLEASE YOUR CLOSEST FRIENDS.

MAKE MANY COPIES
PIN TO BULLETIN BOARDS,
WHERE EVER YOU SEE PUBLIC INTERESTS.. IF YOU SE SOMEONE READ IT, ASK THEIR OPINIONS, GIVE THEM A COPY.
THAT MAKES YOU PUBLISHED.


WRITE MORE. I LIKED READING IT.
SO WILL OTHERS.

IT IS NICE TO BE NICE. MAKE SMALL EDITION.. PRINT ON YOUR COMPUTER AND GIVE OR SELL THEM, EVEN GET A NOM DE PLUME! [FR}. ENJOY ! OR DO NOT DO IT,

Answer 6

It's really amazing isn't it. That sometimes you feel that feeling is a miracle. I love it.

Answer 7

Your poem is too long
And here it doesn't belong
Books and Authors is the site
People don't need to read your crap

Answer 8

I like this. I write poems too.

Answer 9

That's a great poem, you are very talented.

Answer 10

I like your poem it rhymes too