im 14, and i am bisexual. how can i come out the closet without people looking at me funny?

Question

I have tried to tell my brother, because he is my closet friend inside my family, but he looked at me funny, and I was afraid of that The only people that I have told were: my best friend, and my parents. My mom was understanding, and so was my sep-father. But my grand parents, and my aunt like to gossip, even though I fell comfortable around them. So I konw, that if I tell one of them, everybody in my family knows. And on top of it all, sometimes, my emotions get the best of me.
Everybody knows how teenagers can be when you come out the closet, and your confused. They like to take advantage of it by making fun of you, hurting your feelings. I'm afraid, that if I do come out, everybody won't except me, and that will twist with my mind alot, especially with my emotions. I will start to feel like an outcast, and I don't want that feeling.

Answer 1

well ur a bi and be proud u just gotta know ur not the only one out there ur not alone other ppl have this problem 2. i say come out and f*** the ppl that don't except, be proud of who u r stand up 4 ur self!!
GOOD LUCK!!

Answer 2

Please, advise me, how at 14 you know your bi-sexual? Most gays and lesbians are born that way, and know from a very young age they are different, that somehow they don't fit very well into their bodies. Also, at 14, most are in a stage that used to be called, "curious yellow", experimenting and finding out about sex and what it is. Trying it once, liking it, doesn't mean your bi-sexual, it means you were curious. Why don't you just wait, wait until your not so "confused". (your word) You just may save yourself a world of heartache. As time goes on, and it turns out you are bi-sexual, at least wait until you are able to exit the situation should it be more difficult that you expected. Like your own place, or old enough to leave without parental controls.
It will be so much easier on you if you wait.
Besides, you may end up being "straight" and all of it would have been for nothing. Besides, teenagers are the absolutly worst judgemental bigots of all.

Answer 3

Sweetie, if anyone makes fun of you, looks at you funny, laughs at you whatever it doesn't matter. You make your own decisions. No one can live your life. Family and friends whom judge you for anything never loved you from the beginning. Coming out of the closet can be a risk but isn't just living daily one too? I say if you are ready to come out and let people know then do so. If they are true and real they wouldn't care. Good luck to you!!

Answer 4

Looking to your age, things may change and you may turnup a normal girl.. I would advise you to remove the basic thought of bi from your mind now...

Now as regard to your fear of acceptance, I would say even if you really find that you are a bi after you are ripe in age you should respect yourself first, and there is absolutely no need to feel guilty or confused or in any way down to other people... Try to keep your personal things with you only... Why do you wish to publicize it??

Answer 5

ok, first issues first. i'm guessing you're bearing on a water closet or WC to shop time. Technically this refers back to the rather rest room pan itself so subsequently confident you certainly could get out of it as rapid as you could. in case you're having concern doing this your self basically telephone the rescue centers and that they are going to help. do no longer difficulty approximately being embarrassed as they might have dealt with this sort of concern in the previous and probable lots worse. If there is no telephone close to hand basically shout lots and somebody is definite to hearken to you. Snack on your guy or woman finger nails to sidestep starvation. attempt to prevail in the basin first although to bathe your palms as needless to say the WC isn't the cleanest of places. you additionally can attempt to make issues with the rest room paper to pass the time e.g paper hats, those doll chain issues or Christmas decorations. Now in case you're bearing on the whole bathing room then confident, get out yet purely whilst your are finished, so which you should place. attempt to sidestep exiting the bathing room mid company as this could carry approximately a bad mess and a good purchase greater embarrassment than being caught in the pan. in case you haven't any longer started your organization then you certainly could ponder whether you will need interior right here jiffy, if so you would be besides staying placed. in case you reckon you could wait say countless minutes then confident you could come out and provide somebody else the possibility to apply it. desire this facilitates.

Answer 6

well my girlfriend is bisexual and always has been since was bout your age. she said take when she came out it was a slow process but when she felt the time was right she went for what she wanted! so from me to you just take it slow and the go for whatever you heart wants. trust me there are alot of girls that feel the same as you and dont know how to handle it or think that other people will look at them krazy, dont worry bout what they think, just do you!

Answer 7

one day you ill have to just say to hell with what people think and do what you want for you there will always be someone out there tying to judge you when you let this out in the open you will feel like a weight has been lifted my sister's daughter is a lesbian her mother didnt deal with it very well she kept pushing boys on her trying to make her date them and she did and was miserable until she said no more and just told her women are what i want and started living her own life and she's happy now.

Answer 8

HONEY LET ME TELL YOU SOMETHING MY SON IS GAY HE TOLD ME WHEN HE WAS AROUND 14 YRS. I UNDERSTAND WHAT YOUR GOING THROUGH, AND I AM SO SORRY FOR THAT. AS LONG AS YOUR PARENTS KNOW THAT IS GREAT SOME PARENTS DON'T EXCEPT IT. HIS GRANDMOTHER KNOWS ABOUT HIM AND SHE DOESN'T LIKE IT, BUT SHE DEALS WITH IT, NOW IF HIS GRANDFATHER KNEW ABOUT IT, I KNOW HE WOULDN'T LIKE IT. ALL OF MY SONS FRIENDS ACCEPT HIM FOR HIM-SELF. THE OLDER A PERSON IS (LIKE AROUND 50) HAVE A HARD TIME WITH IT, BECAUSE THEY ARE OLD FASHIONED. AT MY APARTMENT COMPLEX SOME KIDS TEASE MY SON, AND HE JUST IGNORES THEM. NOW THEY DON'T BOTHER HIM ANYMORE. KEEP YOUR HEAD UP AND DON'T BE AFRAID OF WHO YOU ARE, BECAUSE IF YOU TRY TO HIDE THE FACT THAT YOU ARE GAY IT'S JUST GOING TO HURT YOU MORE INSIDE. HONEY I'M SORRY IT PEOPLE WON'T EXCEPT YOU FOR WHO YOU ARE, BUT IF THEY CAN'T THEN THEY ARE HAVING A HARD TIME WITH IT AND THEY AREN'T WORTH GETTING UPSET B/C I'M SURE YOU ARE A WONDERFUL YOUNG MEN. GET UP YOUR SPIRITS AND DON'T WORRY ABOUT WHAT PEOPLE THINK.

Answer 9

First of all, you are REALLY smart to ask for help instead of keeping it all inside. You are not alone and there are people available to help you through what may be a very difficult transition. No matter what happens remember; you will not be an outcast, you do not have to change to be accepted or "normal", you are loved by the Divine just as you are.

Here are some things you need to look at when deciding whether or not to come out to your family. I'm not a counselor or a psychologist. I am also not gay or lesbian. But I know a lot of gay and lesbian people who've been through what you've been through. So here are some questions you might want to ask yourself.

Will my parents, guardian or whoever I live with beat me or kick me out of the house when I reveal that I am Gay or Lesbian or Bi?
If you fear that the answer is yes, you need to have a safe alternative place to stay set up BEFORE you come out to the adults with which you live. I would like to suggest that you call the telephone number in the quotes below. It may be a long distance call for you but I bet they accept collect calls when the call is from a teenager who needs help.

"Youth Services
The L.A. Gay & Lesbian Center is one of the nation’s leading providers of life-sustaining services and transitional housing for homeless gay, lesbian, bi-sexual, transgender or questioning (GLBTQ) youth who arrive here from all over the world.
Contact: 323-993-7501
Hours: Monday - Friday
8: 30 am - 5 pm
Email: [e-mail]
Location: Jeff Griffith Youth Center

Jeff Griffith Youth Center
We also operate a youth center, specifically for gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender and questioning young people (15-24), that offers hot meals, showers, clothes, counseling, and much more."

Even if you are located all the way over in the East Coast you should still call because this place can tell you about shelters for gay/lesbian/bi youth that are in your area.


The second question you need to ask yourself is where will you find a safe, supportive, community of people who accept you as you are and who understand what you are going through? The answer is church. I know that sounds crazy but I'm telling you the truth. My denomination, the United Church of Christ (UCC) has "Open and Affirming" churches all over the United States. My church in Long Beach, CA is 40% gay/lesbian/bi and we have terrific programs for youth where gay/lesbian/bi and straight youths hang out together. You do not need to believe in the God of the Old Testament or adhere to any strict religious creed in order to feel comfortable at a UCC Open and Affirming church. So don't be put off just because I'm telling you that you will find a safe and supportive community in a church. Visit the UCC website at the link below and find an Open and Affirming church in your area. Look for the letter ONA somewhere in the church listing.

http://www.stillspeaking.com/find/

Even if you don't wish to attend the actual church service you should attend some of the youth activities and talk to the adults that are there. I am POSITIVE they will be accepting and friendly towards you in a manner that is safe and appropriate.

The other question you need to ask yourself is what can I do to help my family understand better who I am and what I am going through? There is an organization for that called PFLAG. The "Getting Support/Coming Out" page of their website has things like;
"Answers to 15 questions that often come up when a family member or friend tells you that they are GLB or T."
"Information on coming out to family and friends as well as a special feature on “Tips for the Holidays”
Here is the URL: http://www.pflag.org/Getting_Support_Coming_Out.coming_out.0.html

I understand that you may not want "strangers" all up in your business during such a sensitive issue but I would suggest you not come out to your family alone. I bet someone at PFLAG or at the UCC church near you can help you find a counselor who will do a housecall and be there with you when you come out to your family.


Once you've come out and your family is headed towards a place of acceptance the most important question you need to ask yourself is "Hey, where's my next hook up?". Maybe the website below will help.

http://www.gayteens.org/

Keep your head up Baby. You are what you were made to be. Don't ever forget that. -Blessings

Answer 10

The only thing you can do is be yourself. Come out when you are ready. If people cant accept you for who you are then that is there lose.