there are some girls at school and they always start rumors and talk behind my back, it gets really annoying but i never say anything, i don't know why they hate me so much we used to be friends but not anymore. i have never done anything to make them feel this, way and i would understand if i did. the only reason i can think of why they hate me is because i have made a lot of new different kinds of friends in school, and am doing better academically then they are, some people say they are just jealous of me, but i am really tired of them acting like 3rd graders and just wish that they would be more mature and get over it already. the things they do really bug me, and I need to know of a way for it not to bother me so much, what do you thik i should do?
2006-09-08 17:50:57 · 14 answers · asked by blinkdan04 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
Just as you said, it's a shame they can't be more mature. They're not though so what 'can' you really do about it? Don't let them get a rise out of you, no matter what. That's rule number one. Next is that you just try and avoid them as much as you can. When you do run into them, which you ofcourse will in school, don't be overly cold or friendly to them. Just get in there and get out. Don't let them think you're trying to get on their good side or trying to avoid them as they'll use that against you. Just endure they're petty $hit until you don't have to deal with them anymore or their short attention spans forget about you and move onto something else.
2006-09-08 17:54:27 · answer #1 · answered by Olivia B 6 · 2⤊ 1⤋
I agree with most of the answers here but there is something that I would also like to add or even suggest. As someone already said, maybe you should arrange to meet them/one of them somewhere and clear the air (Don't do it agressively).
You were friends with them so start out by saying, I used to be friends with you guys but I have noticed a change lately and I would like to know what's going on? and let them explain and then you can give your opinion.
The thing is, since you have moved on and found different friends they may feel left out/betrayed. I am not saying they are right for spreading rumours about you. Only people with self esteem issues do that but what I am saying is, sometimes we hurt people and are unaware of it. So you coming together and talking about it will lay everything to rest and at the end of it you don't have to go back to being "friends" with them but at least you guys will be at peace where you can still say hi.
2006-09-08 18:21:30 · answer #2 · answered by Lady Mandeville 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't let the immaturity and ridiculous drama have the power to control your feelings.. I don't suggest making friends who treat you that way, and you know that. If you let others step on you, you will never have the chance to shine and show the wonderful person that's inside of you.
Friends are wonderful, and it's always nice to have someone to sit next to you in lunch or talk to, but when problems arise, sometimes enough is enough. The best thing you can do is walk away and let them think about it. And if they come back, remember that life's a lesson and forgiveness is something that can be appreciated most... life is a lesson and it's sometimes the hardest thing to learn.
Well I'm sorry I don't have much to say, but I hope this helps. Good luck and don't change the wonderful person that you are!!
Have a great day :)
2006-09-08 18:12:17 · answer #3 · answered by ? 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
As we grow, we often learn great wisdom and knowledge, for those who want to listen or observe. Concentrate on your studies and don't worry what others say. I was that way many moons ago myself. I matured quicker than most of my classmates, but then I had met many friends as time went on, and for some old friends they fall away when they get older. You no longer belong in their cliche, and because you have matured they have ventured away, because many of things you did together once is childs play now. Although you have grown up, they haven't and that makes it a new ball game. Our lives change from the many changes in our home life or relationships-believe me, eventually they will catch up-but just pace yourself and keep studying academically-hey will come around-our maturity levels are different as time goes on...
2006-09-08 18:02:10 · answer #4 · answered by tombowling49 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's never easy dealing with hate, discrimination, and everything in between. Of course we all want to be liked by everyone - that is every human being's instinct. But the truth is if you were liked by everyone then you wouldn't be unique to your own - you would only be a "people pacifier". Those types of people who seek to pacify everyone are very miserable people and usual end up depressed, suicidal, or in abusive situations. In order to gain your freedom you have to stand out. That means putting up with ridicule and many other things. You have to choose to be bigger than them. I know it's not easy, but as you begin to practice and exercise the muscle of ignoring them it does get better. And after awhile when they finally realize it doesn't bother you, they give up! After all you can't kill a dead man because he's already dead! I pray God gives you an inner strength and peace within yourself. God bless you and remember what doesn't kill you will make you a better, stronger person. ;-)
2006-09-08 18:06:45 · answer #5 · answered by serene peak 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Maybe for your own piece of mind you could go up to each one of them and just ask what is going on that they have turned on you like they have.
Explain to them each that you had thought of each one of them as friends but now because of the way they are each acting towards you that you feel they aren't friends any more you you would like to know why that is.
Don't let any of them know that what they are doing is upsetting you in any way or that could trigger them to be even more nasty towards you then they already are and you might never learn what set them off.
They might tell you what the problem is if you are able to talk to each one by herself but not when they are together because if they see how much it hurts you they could even get nastier towards you and you sure don't deserve that kind of treatment at all.
I am glad that you have made new friends already and hopefully they won't let you down like the others have.
Best of luck to you.
2006-09-08 18:00:16 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Nice has the best suggestion. Bring up a connection then simple confrontation. Say something like - "We used to have such nice talks or practice putting on make-up together. I can't imagine that you hate me so why are you are hurting me this way?" Truthful, honest and to the point.
2006-09-08 18:08:26 · answer #7 · answered by Applecore782 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
well if u used 2 b friends u should know how 2 stop them.
mabey they feel stronger than u r coz u r one againist a group.
anyway surruond ur self with good friends that will cover ur back. after all u know that they r lying so just ignore them.
by the way if they are lying, ppl will know the truth after all.
2006-09-08 18:01:16 · answer #8 · answered by Ms.genuine 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's the age; it goes on in ever school, every year, by the same age group. Drama is king. Gossip rules, and bitchy girls will be bitchy girls. It seems they just don't know what else to do in order to be 'popular".
Pray that you Can hold out until your senior year, or college. they will outgrow some of it.
2006-09-08 17:55:48 · answer #9 · answered by seeitmiway32 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This story is as old as the bumps on my Mothers chest! There is really nothing you can do about it! Pretty much anything you try to do about it, will simply make it worse!
The only thing you can do is ignore it! If they feel it bothers you, they will do it more!
2006-09-08 17:59:31 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋