Dr. Phil's Life Law is..There is power in forgiveness.
Strategy: Open your eyes to what anger and resentment are doing to you. Take your power back from those who have hurt you.. my question is ..is it possible to forgive someone who molests you..after all the pain and embarrassment (sp) and humiliation they put you through. I still have to see this person unfortunatley and honestly no i don't want to forgive him.. but i cant sleep at night and it's affecting my relationships with my family and personal friends. what can i do to not let this consume me.. besides see a therapist.. sorry for the shitty spelling.
2006-09-08 15:21:26 · 5 answers · asked by xblondie712x 1 in Social Science ➔ Psychology
You don't have to tell the person who hurt you that you have forgiven them. You can just lay your pain to rest in your heart and allow yourself to move on without having to carry that baggage with you. You cannot change the past. You do have the choice of letting it consume your future. That terrible period of your life should not have the power to ruin the rest of your life. If you allow that person and tragedy to define your life, then that person wins.
2006-09-08 15:30:30 · answer #1 · answered by TXChristDem 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are not willing, than no matter what anyone says or does will make a difference in trying to forgive. I sense a desire to be put right yourself, & have been there myself. Possibly there is some room to explore forgiving yourself. You may also benifit from exploring what forgiveness means vs. holding others accountable. Your statement, "I still have to see this person unfortunateley" is a choice. You may chose to live where you do because other people & things are more important to you then the pain yu are reminded about the past. Focus on the others around you for that choice & be happy with that. If not, move. You may also need to work out other issues & see a different therapist or doctor if you can't get unstuck on your own or with the coping skills you have at this point.
2006-09-08 15:41:49 · answer #2 · answered by Counselor 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You've gone through a powerful experience and still have reason to resent/hate the person who did this to you. What would be best is to find some way to get them out of your life, if you can't you might want to take the high road and forgive them (but never let them forget what a good person you are for doing so)
2006-09-08 15:25:14 · answer #3 · answered by DonSoze 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yea...I've been molested 3 damn times...and I ain't forgiving any of the guys. Technically, I shaped my life to avoid them and I'm fine with it this way. They don't deserve any forgiveness. And I'm not gonna let what they did to me ruin my life either, so it rarely affects me in a negative light. I'd have to say just try and avoid hiim... build a life away from him. Depends who he is. My moms current fiancee is the latest that did it to me, and I told her, and she still chose to be with him, but respects that i have no desire to see him. so it works. If it's someone you're stuck seeing from other ppl, tell someone and find a way to avoid him. You don't deserve to let it affect you really... you can overcome it. Heh.
2006-09-08 15:34:55 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have the creep jailed & then you can forgive him!!!
2006-09-08 16:10:29 · answer #5 · answered by Da Bomb 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋