life's so hard?

Question

ever since like 8th grade my life has been filled unpleasent events

always being beaten by my brother, my parents arguing and finally getting divorced, friends backstabbing me, failing classes, no luck with the ladies, just this past summer i got in a car crash that ruined my life for the rest of the summer, parents still arguing, my mom and dad both get really angry when i want to hang out with my friends instead of giving my brother a ride somewhere or going to my dad's fiance's house.

but i feel i can blame all my troubles on my parent's divorce when i was in the 8th grade, i am now in 12th grade.

everything before my parents got divorced went well, my life was almost too perfect to be true i had lots of friends, got straight A's in shcool, and got all the girls. but since my parents got divorced my life has been a living hell and i feel like i should just end it.


please help any advice will do.

Answer 1

HI Rocky!

I think the problem is that your parents divorced. It is something parents decide to do without council of the children. The children suffer. No one wants to come from a broken home and spend half of the time at one house and half of the time at another. Call another person "mom" or "dad" It is hard. Things have been tough.

You need to hold your head high and get back to the good grades and know that you can do this. If it seems like the world around you has crashed is no reason you have to let yuour world crash. Do good in school and make something of yourself and have a life. You can meet someone nice one day and you will have learned from the things that have passed in your life.

Be patient and be good to yourself. Make peace with your Brother, he suffers too. Let your parents know that they caused you trememdous suffering and you are going to make changes in your life for the better!!!

Good Luck!!! You can do this. You are number one and have a great future ahead!!!!!!!

Answer 2

Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem.

You are almost 18. When you are, graduate high school and join the military as soon as you can. The military will get you out of your situation and train you for your future. When you are ready, you can go home and you will definitely be viewed as a man, not as a snot-nosed kid. If they give you any crap, you can just go back to base and live your life without them. They will wise-up sooner or later.

Divorce is devistating to a kid. It makes him feel as if he is unwanted, unloved and not worth anything to his parents. You ask yourself "Why did they have me if they don't want me anymore?" You blame yourself for their failed marriage. You feel suicidal. You want to run away from the guilt, the anger, the fear, the emptiness, the future without a mom and dad at home every day, and the unknown of it all.

The truth is, you are not responsible for their break-up. I doubt there is anything you did that caused Mom to say to Dad "I want a divorce because Junior got a "D" in Math." There must be an underlying reason for the strife. Usually it's money and the shortage of it at the end of the month. Or maybe Mom is accusing Dad of not being a husband and father as he should. Maybe Dad is accusing Mom of not doing her part to keep the house clean, the kids fed on time and getting the bills in the mail on time. There are a million different, public reasons people get divorced. Only they know the real, deep-down, private reasons. Counseling can help, but if there's no genuine will to repair the damage, then the marriage is doomed.

But don't kill yourself. You are too young to throw away what could be a brilliant future. Give yourself the chance to live it.

Answer 3

Where as I can understand how your feeling you really need to stop. Only YOU can make your life a living hell.
Your parents divorce does not have to mean that YOUR life is over. You make your life what it is.
Your parents divorcing does not have anything to do with whether or not you get the girls, whether or not your grades are good, whether or not you have friends.
Those things are up to YOU and only YOU.

Where as their divorce may have been disruptive to the family and to your life, you can NOT blame them for all your problems.
You need to get a different out look on life, get a different attitude, and stop blaming everyone else for your problems.
Especially after 4 yrs and you are now a senior and about to graduate.
Your a man not a boy so start taking responsibility for your own actions, your own problems and your own life.
Otherwise your going to end up being a failure at everything you do in life.
From school, to jobs, to girlfriends, to marriage later on, to being a father later on.........EVERYTHING

With the divorce rate what it is, if everyone blamed their parents divorce for all their problems and sat around and felt sorry for themselves then this would be one sorry world.
There wouldn't be doctors, lawyers, astronauts, politicians etc.....Probably at least 75-80 percent of the most successful people in the world have been children of divorced parents.
But they chose not to let it ruin their lives and they took responsibility for their own actions and their own lives.
And so should you.

Answer 4

DONT GIVE UP!! believe me everyone goes through hard times, just unfortunately your time is now, other people will have it too but at different times. This is what makes us the people we are and stronger people. I had a very rough childhood also but I plowed through and I am doing very good today, it made me a very strong person and I have come up with the belief that the only person I can rely on is myself. My sister on the other hand (same upbringing) never dealt as well and has spent most of her life in and out of prison, and now serving 18 years. Just focus on youself and beleive me this will pass. Dont drink or take drugs to hide again that will only make matters way worse, and I am not religious by any means, but alittle prayer doesnt hurt,Good Luck

Answer 5

Life is tough sometimes, but you have a lot of living left to do.My advice to you would be to learn from others mistakes, and do not make the same ones yourself. Do not go thru life blaming your failures on what someone else did, does or may do. Look around yourself and compose a better song, because that will be the honest measure of your worth

Answer 6

I would suggest talking to your counselor at school to see if they have any suggestions on finding support groups that could help you out. I've had a pretty similar life as you, and I went to counseling for 4 years to help me. I now am happily married with 2 beautiful children and all the past memories are locked away. I hope that everything works out for you.

Answer 7

Please don't even mention the word "suicede". It helps in no way at all. Once a life is taken it can never be broughten back, but if you try you can fix your problems. A lot of people's parents get divorced but they managed to live through it and so can you. If you still feel as if you want to take your own life, Please, Please visit a counselor maybe they can help change your mind better than me. So just try, and good luck, you'll make it through this. Trust me!

Answer 8

calm down now! your going trough a stage most teens go through.. try looking at thing in a positive way.. not negative..it wont be easy..but it' will work.
my b/f was like that too.. but worst..
I've been w/ him for 2yrs now I'm he's first g/f so I'm trying to teach him that life is not always about the down side..
I'm still trying to help him look at things in the positive way not the negative..and well things are looking out for him too.. he's in college and about to graduate next yr! received scholarships and even has he's own place w/ me
he was such a pessimist.. i told him.. what my boss told me
"when you send negative energy out, you get negative energy in return, but when you send out good energy, you receive good back"
kind of like karma if you belive in that
things happen for a reason
and about your brothers..dont worry.. been there done that!
i have 2older brothers and an older sister they always picked on me so did my teachers..saying id be a nobody. never dated till i graduated 2yrs ago my parents arguing and me put in between all the hell hole..but now i'm in college w/ my b/f and i'm going to be a teacher. next yr i'll be getting my degree on child development
ex.
a child who grew up w/ abussive parents and a really bad life by grew up such a negative child
when he became older he became a writer..one of the best writers in the world! (guess who that is)
-but then a fairy said.. you have one wish, he wished he's parents were happy as well as he
grew up w/ the best parents and became a doctor, both parents supporting him

Answer 9

Try to look at all the things in your life that are good. There is always something. try to make your life better, only you can do it. Good Luck and hope things get better, sorry to hear about your parents.

Answer 10

Been there done that, life does get better trust the word of the ones who know! Good luck!