Is it way too young or can it work out?

Question

I was just wondering if you think getting married at 19 is too young and if so why? Is there anyone that got married really young and it actually worked out? Please give me some words of wisdom?

Answer 1

19 is young but then you have to think about whether or not you want everyone to be happy or if you want to be happy.

I married at 20, not much older than you and was married for 13 and a half years. So yes they can work if you want it too and work together to keep what you have now. Or you can sit back and enjoy being young with him/her until you are a few years older and have had time with this person before making the commitment of marriage to them.

You are of an age that if you want to marry, you can, you are legal to make that decision. Its best to go with what is in your heart and not by what others dictate you should do. Only you and the one you are with can make a marriage work or break. Only you.

Answer 2

Don't get married yet. You are asking the question because your inner self is even thinking it is to young.

19 years old you are just starting your young adult hood. The next 3 or 4 years you are going to change so much that you wont believe it till it happens. If you can go to a college take courses, travel see different places, try different jobs. Do things you want to do.

When you get married you will be doing what you both agree on and as a couple. Kids come along you stop doing what you want and you do what the kids want.

Take a break before marriage. You will be much happier in the long run. Don't worry your real true love will be out there when your are ready.

Enjoy being a single young adult first. There is plenty of time for marriage and making a family.

Answer 3

For our grandparents--your great grandparents--early marriage was the norm. If a woman wasn't married by 25 or 26 she was considered and old maid. But there was a reason for it, childbirth took the lives of many brides, and husbands often had to find another wife to care for the children, and have more. In rural areas where most people lived, large families were typical and helpful for work on farms.

Today, with a much different society, women are finding it easier to wait for marriage until the have established themselves independently in a career or other area of life. So marriage is delayed until after 30. This makes sense to me because both men and women are not too sure of their life goals or even their own desires. Waiting helps make better marriages when both husband and wife know their own minds.

I took a young bride of 19 when I was 25. I found out that she was not ready for marriage; although she certainly tried for a year. But a wild background was too much a lure, and she returned to the past she had known. It was a brutal lesson. I didn't get married again until I was 45, and my wife was almost a year older.

I don't say that you will not be successful in a marriage at 19, but I think the odds are against it. I'm sure there have been many successful marriages joined at that age; and those of your parents' time, and my parents', are witness to the fact. Yet today's pressures on young couples are so great that it's just not easy for someone so young, unless they bring a great deal of maturity to the union. Just be asking this question you demonstrate signs of that maturity.

Answer 4

19 isnt too young if youre mature enough to realize the life commitment youre about to make. I married at 21 and my wife was 20 and a week old. Weve been married for 19 yrs and things are good. Marriage is work but its good work unless theres a communication problem. I cant imagine life without being married...its a loving commitment and weve improved each others lives in a multitude of ways. Best of luck...its a good thing not a chris rock joke.

Answer 5

I deal with this problem all the time and see the same problem. Very few actually make it but most try. Most 18 and 19 yr olds are just getting out of high school so they havent had a chance to really experience their freedom and life itself as an adult. Most of them jump into marriage cause they want a happy life like their parents and it never happens. They figure their partner wont be around in a few years and dont want to lose them. 25 is a good age to get married and have it survive,as most are out of college and have some life experience to judge things on and are ready to settle down. If the other person wont wait a few years,then it probably was never meant to be in the first place. You need a few years to grow up in, have some fun and get it out of your system. Otherwise, in a few years youll get bored with life and marriage, begin to wonder if this is all there is, and really regret getting married early before youre really ready. This is why most "young" marriages end up in divorce court. Some young marriages are shotgun weddings where the couples are really in trouble before they even get out of the honeymoon phase. Sorry for my answer,but in real life answers sometimes suck. Good luck

Answer 6

It can work but the odds are against you. If it is to work both you and your future husband need to be committed to leaving your childish ways behind. Limit your contact with your single friends and find married friends or at least friends who are in committed relationships.

My advice is wait. Go to college, live a little more through college and gain some life experience before getting married. Marriage is always a work in progress and can be a challenge for even those people who are older, more mature and have lived a little. By getting married at such a young age you are limiting your ability to have a successful marriage.

Like I said it can work but the odds are against you. So consider the decision very carefully. If the two of you are truly in love, then take the time to sit down together and plan your future. Set benchmarks leading up to getting married in about 3 - 4 years. Get college done and out of the way. Allow yourselves to become a little more financially and emotionally stable before walking to down the isle.

Hope this helps.

Answer 7

My mother was just 20 when she married my father. Next month they celebrate their 50th anniversary. But they are of a different generation, and are the,rather than the rule as far as successful marriages go. Peoples values are much different today especially where marriage is concerned. I think 19 is too young to take on the kind of committment that marriage entails. Instead of tieing yourself down to one person at such a young age, take some time to experience life and find out what it is you want to do with your life. Experience really is the best teacher. Ten years from now, you will be amazed at how much you've experienced and learned about yourself and relationships, and the curve balls that life will throw your way. Good luck.

Answer 8

Many people will disagree with getting married at a young age but most of our grandparents did the same thing.
My grandmother was married at 16 and not by force. Her and my granfather were happily married (of course they had their ups & downs as all marriages do) until the day my grandfather died.
If you feel you are ready, no one else can make that decision for your or say you're too young. It's your choice and no one elses to judge.
If you feel you are in deep love with this person and the feeling is mutual then the two of you should go for it. You don't know unless you try and if the two of you are serious, taking the risk will be rewarding.

Answer 9

If it's any consolation, I got married when I was 19. I'm now 21. I've known my hubby for 6 yrs prior. He had been my best friend and this gave us both a lot of time to get to know each other's good and bad side but at the end, we knew we wanted to be together and we felt we were ready for marriage, so here we are.

Answer 10

your too young and if you two love each other then waiting will just make it better b/c you will want it more i got married at 20 to my first wife and we had 2 kids that are my life but they were not hers so we broke up after 5 years and so i think you should wait
why get married if you love each other then all you sould care about is that your together and then if it don't work then you don't have to go to court and if it does work out then you can get married at a older age