My ex-boyfriend is marrying Plan B and wants me to go. If I said I didn't care about him I would be lying, but I told him to work things out with his girlfriend (a few weeks back) b/c we didn't stand a shot in hell at getting back together. We had a long, complicated relationship. We broke up many times. In addition to that, we don't trust each other. I stated all these reasons when he asked me to reconsider my decision in getting back together with my current boyfriend. He thought that since my current BF and I took a break, this would be the perfect opportunity to fix things b/t us.
Now my ex wants to invite me to his wedding. He said to bring my Boyfriend. I know my Boyfriend won't go. My Ex says it would mean a lot to him if I went. I have no ideal what to do or how to feel.
2006-09-08 09:58:52 · 42 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Time to move on with your life. Looks like he wants his cake and eat it too. He seems to have a problem letting go. Guess it is up to you to move on and it does not seem healthy to invite you.
Wish him well and say goodbye. Only fair to his bride to be.
2006-09-08 10:06:55 · answer #1 · answered by mjdp 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Depends. I have exs who's wedding was no problem as we are still friends enough for that level of behavior. None of my boyfriends I'd taken at the time to those weddings had a problem with it either whether they'd known the groom earlier or no. Being friends, we still trusted each other.
I also have exs whose wedding I'd not attend if I was invited; as we were not friends anymore. No trust = no friendship.
As for the ex/groom's apparent inconsistencies, while he may be adult male in other respects, god help whoever he is seeing, let alone marrying as he seems to be very immature. Seems from what you describe, he needs to take some serious downtime for deep study of himself + relationship 101 before he sees or marries anyone at all.
If your current won't go as he & the groom've not gotten along, go with a girlfriend if you feel you must go.
Good luck.
2006-09-08 10:11:02 · answer #2 · answered by a_m_m_b 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Send a card that says "Good Luck, and Best Wishes to you both".
No, you shouldn't go to the wedding. Whatever freaky reason ex might have for asking you to come is completely invalid because it is inappropriate as all hell. The dude is weird and you are obviously better off without him.
Fact is he did ask Plan B to marry him, doesn't matter why, he did. Period. Now this is her day. That's, that. You wouldn't want your groom's ex to show up at your wedding, right? What do you think THAT chick's agenda would be?!
So tell him good luck, and good bye. Do not talk to him again, unless his divorce is final and you're single. You're asking for drama soup otherwise.
2006-09-08 10:08:01 · answer #3 · answered by niffer's mom 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No way - and not to be impolite but remember it's a huge deal for her, a very special day, and let me ask you this - would you want your fiance's ex, from a very "complicated" (as you put it) relationship in his past, to come to your special day? I had a similar experience but I was the bride, so that's the only reason I am able to give you that perspective. Try and just remove yourself from the picture (because in reality not everything is about you, or me, or any one person, right?) and see it from another perspective. He is at this point in time someone else's husband for all intents and purposes. What difference does it make, really, if you go or not? And why would you want to?
2006-09-08 12:21:06 · answer #4 · answered by mustihearthis 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First,I know this is hard for you but you need to move on in your heart and be happy for him for finding someone who makes him happy. Although you're never going to forget all the good times you had together, marriage is a special time so go support him as a friend. It's his day, so get over the past and show him you can still be friends.If your current b/f refuses to go for whatever reason you might want to re-examine your relationship with him. Sounds like there might be some trust issues there. Talk to him and explain why you want him to support your friend. And stop referering your newly married friend as your ex (it makes u sound like you cant move on) good luck-Sherri
2006-09-08 10:08:14 · answer #5 · answered by runner_chick 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You kind of answered your own question there. you still care about him and your current BF wouldn't go with you, so you have to think about what is best for the relationship you are in. What matters most to you, whether your ex-BF is happy that you go to his wedding to SOMEONE else, or the BF you have now who could potentially be someone you may marry?
2006-09-08 10:02:51 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If your secure enough then go if not send a gift and wish them well. Take care of you bf right now sounds jealous. Don't give him any reason to doubt you. Trust is a big issue. Good luck
2006-09-08 10:04:34 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Send a gift, maybe a nice card from you and the new boyfriend.... but don't go to the wedding if you don't want to. He shouldn't even notice whether you're there or not... if he's truly happy with Plan B.
2006-09-08 10:00:56 · answer #8 · answered by bethiswriting 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like the 2 of you have a lot to work through. I think you both should move on.
By staying in contact with each other it sounds like you and your ex can't move forward with your lives. Which is complicating others that you're involved with.
2006-09-08 10:07:30 · answer #9 · answered by Confused 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Stay clear of the event. Why a man who is talking to you about getting back together is even considering a wedding is curious. Stay far away from this destructive person.
2006-09-08 10:02:43 · answer #10 · answered by movedtoMA 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋