Urgent!!!!!!! please, please, please help me!!!!!!!!!!!!!?

Question

I asked this question about 3 times but i did not realy get the answers i wanted. Please help me. I know this might sound strange but the idea of having sex scares me. Why is that? is there something wrong with me? Its the same with kissing, i mean i dont know if i am good at it, or if i actually can. Please help and thank you so mach for doing so.

I am about 16, if it helps

Answer 1

hey, seriously...i know how u feel...d first time always makes u excited but at the same time, scared...don't worry...there's absolutely nothing wrong with u...everyone feels the same time wen it's the first time...u will always feel unsure whether it will turn out right...or will u end up screwing it? will ur partner tink that u r no good at it and leave u? dis r the types or questions dat will be running in ur head...right?
u mentioned that u r unsure whether u can actually kiss...well, u know what? The unexpected can happen...u will never know if u r good at it unless u try it...so, my advice? Be brave and try...If your partner leaves u because u r a bad kisser, then you'll know that he didn't love ur heart but your body and that he just used u to satisfy his sexual urges...
d same goes for sex...just go ahead and try...who knows? U might actually be very good...its all in d game, my fren...
i hope this helps...good luck!!!!

Answer 2

Well, you are probably not ready to have sex if the idea scares you so much so i would recomend for you not to do it, i mean what's the rush?! and the kissing part sounds like a personality issue i don't believe there is a "right way to kiss" it all depends on the 2 people and for some reason i believe that you are that rare type of person who will only take those steps when it feels right which it hasn't so don't push it or i'm sure you will regret it

Answer 3

Fear of sexual contact is normal. It sounds like you are slightly more anxious than most but it sounds okay as long as it is not the idea in itself that you are afraid of. If the consequences are all you're worried about you'll be fine. You are simply giving these events more importance than they actually need. You could try a number of things. You can envision yourself kissing or having sex and realize all the positive aspects--feel the connection, the electricity, the happiness. Imagine yourself doing it well and without fear. Or you could try reasoning with yourself back in time to see if any events have brought on this fear (very Freudian). Or if all else fails you can always talk about it to your parents, a close friend or even a proffesional counselor, psychiatrist or whatever.

Answer 4

Pardon me but if you will only accept a certain answer, you already know the answer. What is the source of the pressure to have sex? Or to kiss? Here's why I ask. The MOST miserable people I know are those who need to have validation of others to feel good about themselves. You'll NEVER be satisfied and content if that's the case. That's what comes to mind from your question.
So, my advice is to release, let go of, get rid of the pressure to kiss and do other things. The feelings that it's time to do those things will come from inside you at an appropriate time. Until then, relax do the things you enjoy doing and be yourself.

Answer 5

Are you afraid of what the guy will think of you or of your sills at kissing and having sex? Are you scared that he wont respect you? Are you scared of getting attached that much and then being dumped? Are you scared that sex could physically hurt? Are you scared that you wont be able to handle the emotional load?

I don't know you so those are the only reasons I can come up with, but if it is interfering with your love life and you really want to get intimate with someone then maybe you could talk to them about it and work on it together.

Answer 6

The idea of sex scared me too when I was younger I was afraid how it would feel their is nothing wrong with you your just curious it's alright to feel scared about things but as you get older you will learn more I was afraid to kiss too cause I didn't want a guy to think I was a bad kisser it's normal to have these feelings when these times come it will all come natural to you

Answer 7

Have you ever had sex? Do you have a history of abuse in your family? Perhpas you need some counselling. Everyone is nervous their first time, but being really scared is not a common thing. Also, perhaps you just haven't met that right person that just sets you on fire. When you do, you will know it and it will just feel natural. Don't rush it. If you haven't done it, don't rush it. Good luck.

Answer 8

i dont think your scared i think you might not be ready let the thought of fear be a sign that is not time to have sex. kissing is not for everyone you just might not be doing it wth the right person just sit back and weight out the pros and cons and decide if that is what you really want to do at this time and if you dont feel its for you let it go and wait until you fell your ready

Answer 9

If you are scared about it, you are NOT ready!
Don't feel pressured to do something you are NOT ready for.

Once you are no longer scared, that is when it might be ok for you to consider thinking about it.

Just cause everyone else is doing it, doesn't mean it is the right time for you!

Stay strong! There is NOTHING wrong with you!

Answer 10

You know, i have the same problem. I think this is very normal and i wouldnt worry to much about it. I think its your body's way of saying that you arn't ready for that (subconsciously). But dont be so worried about kissing, just let the magic happen. I wish the best of luck to you! Oh and sex can be something scary to think about, because you are giving yourself away to someone. Dont pressure yourself and dont worry so much. You probly wont feel like this forever, it has passed for me. I am no longer worried about those things...

P.S. hormones can make you think crazy things. You wont feel or think like yourself. good luck =]]