We dated for 10 years and have been married for almost 5. I don't love him anymore but I don't hate him either. I am so unhappy and I am afraid to tell him I want out. I told him this in February, he begged for me to give him another chance which I did but it's no use. I want out. I am so chicken to tell him.
2006-09-08 08:44:15 · 13 answers · asked by anonymous 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
If you want out you will find a way. Just leave him if your that unhappy. You know how many times my husband soon to be ex asked me for another chance and how many times i gave him that chance things will only keep going back to the way they were. In the end you need to worry about your own happiness.
2006-09-08 10:25:43 · answer #1 · answered by Tanner and Leahs MaMa 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The most important thing is your (and his) happiness.
Anything that comes from your being honest couldn't be any worse than what's going on at this point in your life. You are both living in denial, and settling for a life you don't want. Let him go, and he will do the same.
He may be very sad after you tell him how you feel, but he can't be that happy right now. You mentioned that this was brought up before, so it's not going to be a huge shock to him this time around. He knows how you feel, and the fact that he's holding on to hope because you're afraid to tell him the truth is unfair.
Tell him exactly what you said here, and the problem will resolve itself.
2006-09-08 16:03:57 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
One of my friends just went through this. She was afraid of her husband's temper, so she found an apartment and moved her stuff out while he was at work. Then she e-mailed him that she had left! Then she spent two weeks with me (in another city) to let him calm down before she encountered him. She also froze their credit cards and otherwise made it impossible for him to run up big bills on accounts that were joint. Now they have been able to talk fairly calmly, and she is working on getting a divorce.
Leaving is never easy, but be sure to protect yourself both physically and financially in case he can't accept the decision you have made and strikes out in some way to try to make you miserable.
Good luck!!
2006-09-08 16:06:20 · answer #3 · answered by Maple 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't tell him that you don't love him anymore and obviously don't tell him you hate him (no need to burn your bridges). If the thought of never seeing him again and never being with him again does not bother you, then it is time to move on. Do you have join assets? Time to get them divided. Start looking for a place. Tell he deserves to be with someone better.
2006-09-08 15:58:38 · answer #4 · answered by lily 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You need to bite the bullet and tell him. Like a band aid ripping it off all at once hurts less than a little at a time. Good luck
2006-09-08 15:58:45 · answer #5 · answered by fortyninertu 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Did you go to counseling first. If you did maybe he would see there is no hope and he would have answers.
Just leaving because you want out will destroy him for a longer period of time than if you both went to counseling.
2006-09-08 16:30:27 · answer #6 · answered by Mit 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No matter how long you prolonged that situation you gone leave him anyway you need to have a serious talk with him about your feelings towards him .asked him about a trial separation maybe not being together might change your mind,no matter what you decided to do,good luck
2006-09-08 15:53:13 · answer #7 · answered by jolie minouche 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
just tell him your not happy I went through the same thing and my ex-husband got really mad but left anyway and got a divorce and am really happy you cant make yourself love someone no matter how long you give it
2006-09-08 19:03:22 · answer #8 · answered by michelle m 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just think of all the years you've already wasted with him. Do you really want to waste any more? Let that be your motivation. Good luck...
2006-09-09 00:08:36 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
just pack up your stuff and leave
if you are too chicken to tell him in person leave a note behind
2006-09-08 15:47:36 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋