me and my girlfriend have known eachother over a year and have been dating for about 7 months. i have always been insecure but i never knew it could get this bad. im constantly worrying about loosing her. i trust her more than anyone else on this earth and im not a very jealous person. recently she has told me about her wanting to look into modeling and for some reason it made me upset even when i think about it i dont like it. why am i like this? and how can i solve it ive talked to her about it and she told me she respects how i feel but it doesnt change how she does. what can i do to get past this?
2006-09-08 08:37:46 · 14 answers · asked by yurbuddy04 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
its for 17 magazine so its not that alot of guys will be lookin at her i dunno.....
2006-09-08 08:43:27 · update #1
You are very wise to ask this question -- it shows that you have insight into your feelings! Also, it sounds like you have chosen a very sensible girlfriend, because I like what she said.
A good counselor could help you figure this out most effectively.
I think simple time and security will make you feel better, though. Be careful not to alienate your gf by behaving with jealousy, and don't act too insecure or needy, because these things can drive her away, and your insecurity would be a self-fulfilling prophecy. But if you proceed with your relationship maturely, behave in a respectful way toward your gf, and strive to display a positive attitude, you will eventually see that you have nothing to feel insecure about. The relationship is still very new, very young, so you can't expect or know for sure that you two will always be together. Take life as it comes.
2006-09-08 08:48:24 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hi,
It's a common thing and can feel that it really bothers you.
What you are suffering from is a hole in your boundary, and you're leaking anxiety about this girl.
Do you feel she's the only girl you can get? When you say you trust her completely, are you being honest with youself, or is it YOURSELF that you don't trust?
Honestly answer these question because they will get you some understanding as to why you feel this way? Did you go through an experience where you lost someone over a similar situation?
Insecurity is tough thing sometimes, I understand where you are coming from. I'll provide a link I think would be good for you to check out. But if you don't want to lose your girl stay as positive and understanding as you possibly can, this is YOUR problem not hers...
Ok?
Cheers
2006-09-08 08:48:52 · answer #2 · answered by adrian_biccum 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you trust her why all the anxiety. A lot of men are very possessive and it sounds like this may be the case.It is OK for you to look touch etc. but under no circumstances is any one else. Has she ever given you reason to think other wise? you may have to talk to a councillor about this if she continues on modelling. Try to be as proud of her as she is of herself
2006-09-08 08:48:18 · answer #3 · answered by rkilburn410 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's normal you to be upset about what she wanna do. Modeling means that a lot of people will see her, and that make you insecure. I don't think is a big problem that you are jealous about it, I think is a normal reaction. But you should let that feeling go and support her.
2006-09-08 08:46:59 · answer #4 · answered by isa_jim 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
First realize that you can't control her. She can leave whenever she feels like it no matter what you do, even if you get married. You have no power over her actions. If you don't trust her leave her. If you know that you can trust her, then be realistic with yourself. Shake it off, ignore it and tell yourself the facts. You'll know if she's really cheating on you, she'll leave.
2006-09-08 08:44:51 · answer #5 · answered by ExceltoExcel 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all you have to learn to be secure with in yourself, books on self esteem can help, or you may need to go to get help, from a counselor, or therapist, You are caring baggage that only you can let go, the only person you are in control of is yourself. Stop beating yourself up and get help.
2006-09-08 08:44:46 · answer #6 · answered by roseannetb@verizon.net 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You should support her. If you don't you will be pushing her away. Just trust her to make the right decisions. A modeling gig. That is great, you should be proud of her.
2006-09-08 08:46:16 · answer #7 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to discover what it is about yourself that makes you so insecure because honestly you can be with any girl and she can be doing anything and you'll always feel the same way because it's actually you, not her.
2006-09-08 08:43:38 · answer #8 · answered by FacingEviction 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm the same way. Just support her in what she does she will love you more for being with her and not against her
2006-09-08 08:42:00 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
you should be proud! YOUR woman is going to be in a magazine!! you can show that off to your friends dummy!
besides not to many dudes read seventeen.
2006-09-08 08:46:04 · answer #10 · answered by thankgodformaryjane 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋