ok im pregnant and the father of the baby lives in cali and doesn't want to take care of the baby...i go to school so i don't have time to care for a baby...i was thinking of abortion and want to do it but its so expensive, what do i do?
2006-09-08 06:47:05 · 38 answers · asked by baby_kakes1987 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
Difficult topic to respond to since it evokes emotions on both sides, and the way you posed the question is bound to stir some negative feelings.
Not going to give my personal opinion here but rather ask you to seek advice from family, friends, church (if it is your thing), a doctor or a counselor. It is a difficult decision that will be with you forever. Your not having time is not a reason to make the decision either way, given that you are 19 (based on 1987 in your name) seek some other opinions and advice. The decision is difficult at any age (becoming a parent or having an abortion), but you have to make a decision fairly quickly.
The father is responsible regardless of what he wants (or doesn't want) so keep him involved.
Don't keep your situation a secret from everyone that you are close to, you will need help either way and involving them now will make it easier.
Hopefully a choice becomes clear to you that you can accept. Good luck
2006-09-08 07:02:50 · answer #1 · answered by Sean N 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'm amazed how judgemental are most of the people who answered to your question. They do not know you, do not know your situation yet they are jumping in to call you names and give you advice based upon THEIR moral believes. The choice is only yours to make. Consider all possibilities, and then decide what you are going to do. Ask yourself what are your goals in life, how would your life look like ten years from now if you have a baby or if you don't. Sure, adoption is a great idea, but then you have to go through your pregnancy and all the emotional issues when it comes to giving up your baby. Despite what people may say here, it is not your duty to make some couple happy. Who by the way mostly want perfect, white, newborn babies.
Think about what is best for you right now, if you have close friends talk to them or seek counseling. Go to Planned Parenthood for advice, they can also help you with contraception. So when the next time you get pregnant you are going to be ready to bring a child to this world. Because the quality of life, both yours and the babies, is important.
Good luck!
2006-09-08 07:24:14 · answer #2 · answered by szubuti 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would go talk to a counselor about all of your options, I'll tell you though, there are resources out there to help you care for the baby. I go to school and I have a 3 mo old. It's very possible to do, and if that's the only reason you can think of to get an abortion and/or adoption, I suggest you seriously weigh all of your possibilities and atleast think of a different reason not to care for the child. Not having time to care for a baby, not an excuse, i don't think any mother really has time to care for a baby, every mother has other things to do as well but they make time. Plenty of woman have been full time mom, have a full time job and find time to have fun as well. It's about setting priorities. School is very important but isn't a reason not to care for your baby. Plenty of woman and men have raised children on their own. Not a very good excuse at all.
2006-09-08 06:57:17 · answer #3 · answered by melashell 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
if you are ok with having an abortion GO FOR IT
imagine what your life will be to have a fatherless baby. do you think it will be easy? NO and do you think your kid will be happy? no. you wont be able to go to school if you have a kid and you wont be able to have a full time job for a while so how will you support the baby?
an abortion is only like $500 most states you dont need parental consent and it is a 1 day procedure you will be in and out in like 6 hours. it doesnt really hurt. only some cramps after but they give you all the meds you need.
dont mess up your life by bringing another life into the world that neither of you are ready for.
2006-09-08 07:10:10 · answer #4 · answered by The Weed Fairy 4 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Ask for help from family or the father. If you can barely afford the abortion, how do you think you could afford to take care of the child?
And, next time, think about this problem before it occurs and use some birth control. Was your goal to get pregnant, or just a side effect of stupidity?
2006-09-08 06:54:34 · answer #5 · answered by LAS 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I can't tell you what to do but I ask you please, do not have an abortion. If anything-give the baby up for adoption. It isn't the baby's fault that you made a mistake and didn't think things through before you got pregnant. In an adoption a lot of times the adopting family will pay your medical expenses. Give the little one a chance at a good life with someone else.
2006-09-08 06:50:06 · answer #6 · answered by pack513 4 · 3⤊ 2⤋
Getting an abortion just because you "don't have time to care for a baby" is ridiculous. You make time, or at least find someone who CAN take care of it while you go to school. If you really want to do something, you will find a way to do it. Otherwise, adoption would be a better answer, at least someone would hopefully find the time to care for the child.
2006-09-08 06:51:22 · answer #7 · answered by angelbaby 7 · 2⤊ 2⤋
hi,i am going to be quite honest with you, you will regret having an abortion,may not be right after,but someday you will.Since you don't want to care for a child, at least let the child live, the baby is the innocent one here,There are so many couples out here that would love to adopt this child,at least let them have the miracle they have always wanted and let the child live. you won't regret it.
2006-09-08 06:56:24 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Oh look another dumbass who spread thier legs and got pregnant and instead of taking responsibility they want to murder a innocent baby because your to lazy to take care of it.
I was 16 when I got pregnnt, I now am 19 and work and go to college but you did not see me go cry to a murderer telling them to rip my innocent child out of me.
If you do not want a baby give it up for adoption insetad of of killing it and newsflash for you you can die from abortion.
They REALLY need to make it illegal for abortions, maybe then you moron kids will think before having unprotected sex and if you do then atleast you are forced to live with the consequences.
2006-09-08 07:31:48 · answer #9 · answered by Diamonds_Glow 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I would like 2 know where your from. It's going to surprise u but I know a medical fund that will help u pay for it especially u being in school & the father doesn't want 2 be involved. email me with your info at chrstn_rdrgzd@yahoo.com & I'll more than glad to help u with your problem. I was in the same situation the only difference I had my baby father but I was still in school!
I would be more than happy to help out!
2006-09-08 06:52:13 · answer #10 · answered by nena 1 · 3⤊ 1⤋