New moms - what do you need most when first home?

Question

I am about to be a Grandma - any day. What did you find you needed most for the first few days home from the hospital with a new baby? I don't want to be intrusive, but want to be there when needed. I'm thinking of the first 2-5 days home. What would help most - cooking meals, taking baby so you can get sleep, running errands, moral support - what did you find you needed? I welcome all suggestions! Thanks.

Answer 1

Helpers need to do things other than baby care. Mom needs to do baby care and bond with baby and establish breastfeeding.

Things that would be greatly appreciated post-partum:

doing laundry
cooking meals or bringing over take out
making sure she has healthy snacks and drinks that are easy to grab when she is busy with baby and tired (make up a whole loaf of bread as PB&J and put it back in the bag and store it in the fridge for her)
running errands
cleaning house
keeping an ear out for a sleeping baby while mom gets a shower and gets dressed
providing encouragement and support for breastfeeding
driving mom and baby to any post-partum checkups

Make sure she has the phone number of the local La Leche League in case she has any breastfeeding questions. With a newborn, the Leader may even be willing to come to her home if she needs help. (Depends...the Leaders are trained volunteers so her own family situation plays into determining if she can do a home visit.)

Answer 2

What you mentioned.....cooking, running errands, taking baby so mom can sleep.......they all sound wonderful!

When I first got home from the hospital we had a few people bring us a couple meals....that was a big help because you don't have time or the energy to cook. Running errands would be nice too because when you first get home from the hospital, you don't feel like going out to the store. Just knowing that you're there to help with anything will mean a lot! Congrats on being a Grandma!

Answer 3

I personally would NOT want anyone taking my baby so I can sleep. If I get to the point where I'm tired, I just lie down with my baby. However the new mommy may be different. If she is nursing it would probably be best to not take the baby, though you could hold and play with the baby for an hour in the house so mom can get some shut eye.

I personally needed more help with cleaning and meal preperation than anything else. Also running errands like going shopping is very helpful.

Answer 4

a new mother could definitaly use some sleep! Taking the baby for 2 hours would be perfect I think. Maybe you could give a FEW tips but some times a new mothers hormones can make her a little snippy. Cooking meals would also be a good thing if the mother is breastfeeding keep in mind that the mother can not eat certain foods because it could give the baby gas. When I first went home with my baby I had NO HELP, no family there to help me and I had a c-section which made matters worse. My husband helped but it wasnt enough. I think you are being very generous and good for you for helping your daughter or daughter in law out!!!

Answer 5

Congrats!

As first time parents, we somewhat got overwhelmed coming home. We felt like we were kids again, wanted to do everything ourselves, but didn't know how. You are doing the right thing, not being intrusive, like saying "don't do that, baby can't...", "do this, do that". Moral support and meals were the most important. After a couple days, cleaning around the house became very important, baby clothes start piling up, dirty dishes, etc. I think you hit the most stuff right on. Lucky to have you as a grandma!

Answer 6

You are truly a Blessing !

This is so considerate of you! In my culture, Grandma is soley responsible for bathing baby and looking after baby generally right after the baby is born - especially first babies. This is to allow the mother to heal psychologically as well as physically before taking in on the extra responsibility of looking after a baby. It is also assumed that the mother will learn some skills from Grandma who has already been there before.

But also it is also nice to have someone there to lean on to do all the other things like making a meal, making sure the house is clean, someone to hold the baby when the Mom needs to rest.

I think if you're there for the first few days it will be wonderful; make sure they know you are on call ready to do anything, and make it easy for them to ask you.

Of course they'll only appreciate it, which new mom wouldn't?

Answer 7

The thing that helped me the most was when my sister cooked some meals for me the first days. My mom helped me too by taking care of the baby while I got some much needed sleep, the first day out of the hospital.

Answer 8

this may sound strange, but what i wanted out of anything in the world was for my grandma to just get in the bed with me and my daughter. yes i needed meals and someone to take my daughter for a hour or two so i could rest, but i just needed to know after the baby was born i wasn't alone. because i cried for the first day home. i wasn't sure i could handle being a great mom. and when the meals were finished and she brought the baby back, she'd stop and set on the bed to ask if i was o.k. and if i needed anything. and my response was always a hug. because alot of times what happens is mothers feel forgotten as well.

Answer 9

Meals, laundry, errands.

Don't take the baby unless your daughter (in-law?) asks you to, though- this should be her time to bond with the baby. Ideally, she should just be able to lie in bed and cuddle and nurse her new baby and *rest* and recover, and you can play an awesome part in helping her be able to do that!

If you come in, though, and say "here, let me take this baby so you can sleep!" she might not be willing to say no to you, even if she doesn't want it. If she does ask you, of course, then cuddle that little newbie like crazy. :D

Congratulations, and good on you for being such a supportive grandma! My mom was with me for the first week after my daughter was born, and it was the best.

Answer 10

Can I rent you for a while when we have our next baby?!? ;-)

For me, I would say that meals would have been most appreciated. We ended up eating take-out for the first couple of weeks. Put up some one-dish suppers that they can toss into the microwave or into the over for a little while and have a meal. Think protein! (Lasagna, pot roast, some chicken meals.)

Offer to help out with errands, offer to tend to the baby so the parents can eat, sleep, and (oh, how nice it would have been to) shower! Try not to be too intrusive. When I have had mine, I've always wanted to be able to to everything from day one. I don't know how your grandbaby's parents are, though.

Good luck and many congratulations!!!