About a month ago my boyfriend asked if he could spank me. I said no because of my feminist principles. He asked again about a week ago. Again I said no. Then I told my best friend about it, expecting her to agree with me. She was actually surprised I had refused and said she was spanked by her BF often. I asked a couple of other friends and they said similar things. Is getting spanked normal? Am I one of the few women who have refused? Should I change my mind and let my BF spank me?
2006-09-07 23:32:28 · 28 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
I was surprised by the number of people I knew who were into spanking. I always thought it was just me who liked it.
If you give it a try and enjoy it great, if it doesn't work for you you don't have to do it again. Most people i know who don't enjoy it just kind of tolerate it because they know their partner enjoys spanking games.
And as far as your feminist principles are concerned, the bottom, or the person being spanked, is the one with the power, as you proved by excerising your right to say no. If you work out a safe word you can maintain that control without ruining the mood by invoking it to slow things down or stop them outright. There's a lot more advice I could offer but this is an open forum, kiddies could be reading.
So give it a try, you have little to lose, and if you wind up enjoying it you have just increased your adult playtime activities to the nth degree, because in the spanking world there are so many fantasies and scenarios that you'll never get bored.
Good luck, I hope you enjoy it as much as I do.
2006-09-11 05:12:12 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 11⤊ 1⤋
Hello KS, I know how you feel and I never would have believed that I would allow my hubby to ever spank me. Like you I had a close friend who told me that her hubby spanks her in a playful, sexual way all the time! Once I tried it, I have to admit that it really is a turn on! Here is the thing, you have to be very clear with your boyfriend what is going to happen and have a "code word" that you two can use to let him know that it's either too hard or you have had enough. If you do it while role playing or just wrestling with each other before sex is the best time.
Another time it's enjoyable is when you are on top of him in the missionary position and just as you are about to orgasm, have him spank you then! The combination of the stinging on your ... and the pleasure of the orgasm is really something!
Have fun!
2006-09-12 02:56:05 · answer #2 · answered by ? 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I consider myself a feminist. I am a professional independent strong woman. However, I have always had an interest in being spanked. I don't like S & M or anything--but a good healthy spanking any time!
Most of my gf's also enjoy it-so I think it is a "fetish" that is more widespread than many people think. Perhaps we all like it to a certain extent--the buttocks are an erogenous zone.
So--I suggest you give it a try--and if it does zero for you--maybe you could humor bf once in a while--but who knows maybe it will be the "New Adventures of Spanko Grrl":)
But it has nothing to do with male-female relationships in the way you are thinking.
2006-09-12 19:50:06 · answer #3 · answered by beckychr007 6 · 4⤊ 0⤋
I was going to say essentially the same thing that Philip K said (his answer was right on target), but I would add one more thing. If your BF wants to give you playful spankings and you're curious to try them, put your feminist principles aside and try something new. It may also be that your BF wants to give and RECEIVE spankings, so ask him if he'd like to be spanked. Perhaps he does but was too shy to ask. Having him over your knee may assuage your feminist principles some.
2006-09-09 02:48:40 · answer #4 · answered by Joe B 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Of course he should spank you all the time... It will make you feel good and wet and it will turn him on too. I get spankings all of the time from my dates. I've escorted for 10 years and they pretty much all love to spank me. They think the red *** is hot too. I can orgasm splash from a spanking.
2015-02-23 22:31:23 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is done by many - but not all. Dont feel you are alone on this. If you feel uncpomfortable or insulted because of feminist priinciples then ask yourself the following... are you insulted by the action itself? or by your boyfriend. . ? Bear in mind you will be spanked with love - not in a chauvanist, insulting and embarrassment inducing way. Put it this way, if he wants to spank you, he may want to be spanked himself. That immediately makes it a 2 way thing and not a male / female thing.
bottom (excuse the pun) line, is if you dont like it, dont do it again, But give it a go. . the spice in life after all is trying new things. Particularly in bed.
peace
2006-09-07 23:38:07 · answer #6 · answered by Christopher 2 · 4⤊ 1⤋
I know its not for everyone, but I happen to enjoy spanking. Whether I'm spanking or being spanked its always fun and never boring.
2006-09-11 05:17:08 · answer #7 · answered by Jester 3 · 4⤊ 0⤋
Feminist principles are an excellent thing, but maybe you're interpreting them a little too narrowly. Quite a few women would argue that a major element of feminism is feeling free to explore your sexuality in any way you like - and if that includes consensual spanking, there's no contradiction involved.
So if you're in any way curious about being spanked, by all means give it a try - and don't feel you're being disloyal to your sisters or yielding to some form of male chauvinism. Plenty of women - like your friends - find it a huge turn-on if it's done right. (I'm assuming your b/f knows what he's doing, and knows all about safewords, etc.) And playing submissive games in the bedroom in no way equates to being submissive in the rest of your life.
2006-09-08 02:40:34 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 8⤊ 2⤋
Even if he's your bf, he should still respect your principles dear. Doesn't mean that everybody's doing it that you should also do it. If spanking you is against your principles and its not ok with you, dont let him do it. My former gf does not want to be spanked, and never did I like spanking anyweyz.. :P I feel like treating my gf an animal if I do that. no no no.
2006-09-07 23:36:08 · answer #9 · answered by tainted_aven 2 · 1⤊ 2⤋
What the hell is wrong with you lady? Dont you think he's in a way praising those lovely booties of your's as long as hes not hurting you. He's your boy friend. If not your's then whose butts will he play with. I really dont understand why you said no. And feminist principles??? what feminist principles? between you and you man? you tell me dosent it sound like you are choking the throat of your relation?
2006-09-07 23:53:49 · answer #10 · answered by Lord Of Lust 5 · 3⤊ 1⤋