My b/f and I have been 2gether for 2 yrs, and I am totally in love with him, I think. I know I'm very attracted to him, our sex life is great, I have such a deep feeling for him, always wanting to be with him, always wanting to hug him, he makes me laugh everyday(very important to me), He's great with my kids, they like him alot. The problem is mostly that he has many addictions. He smokes cigs, drinks beer all day long, smokes pot too, and hasn't had a steady job. He has only worked off and on. He lives with me, he previously went thru a really hard divorce, where his ex took their children from him. He is very depressed about not having his children in his life. I know he loves me very much, he shows it, in other ways besides monitarily. His addictions havn't really ever caused friction between us, except for the fact that it's draining my bank account. He knows he needs to get back to work, and curve the habits. I believe he's trying, but am i fooling myself that he's gonna change?
2006-09-07 03:55:42 · 11 answers · asked by mckenzington 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
The only way this man will change is if he is forced to change. You aren't helping him by allowing him to bleed your finances dry. You have your children to think about as well. Stop buying the beer and supplying the funds for him to buy them on his own. Tell him he needs to kick his habits, and you will stand by him while he does. But that if he refuses to do so, he will stand alone. This type of life is very hard to get out of, he probably needs more help then himself and you. Not that your support isn't vital, it just might not be enough to get him out of his rut and his addictions. I wish you all the luck in the world and I hope that he can kick his issues out the door so that you might find true happiness together.
2006-09-07 04:20:09 · answer #1 · answered by Mary J 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I doubt he'll change. Maybe he'll get a job for a while and not drain your bank account, but he will either quit or lose it because of lack of determination. It is possible to be attracted to someone without falling in love with them. When you open your heart, that's when you fall in love. If you don't then you're in the clear. I would find someone else because as much as he loves your kids, he'll always have those smoking and drinking habits, not to mention not having a steady job.
2006-09-07 04:00:22 · answer #2 · answered by LovelyLady 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This sounds crazy! You want that type of influnce around your kids? Read your question over again. Sex can be really good with someone who is not draining your account. Cut the money off and see how great the sex becomes
2006-09-07 04:00:57 · answer #3 · answered by cthelight 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Is this really worth draining your bank account and the future of your kids lives? You need to impress upon him how much he needs to kick these habits. If he doesn't do it, you need to rid of him. You do not need the excess weight. He is not your child and you shouldn't have to support his bad habits. Believe me, just as you found him that you are very attracted to, there is another one out there who is better.
Move on for your kids sake.
2006-09-07 05:09:20 · answer #4 · answered by WANDERER 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think it happens each and all the time, there are couples that love eachother yet they don't have intercourse. There are 2 styles of affection: emotional and actual. If she does not bodily love you, then that isn't result the dating in any respect in her end because of the fact she is emotionally involved in you. Emotion charm is the only requirement for protecting a dating. to boot, it is unlike the two certainly one of you're married. intercourse should not be a precedence on your dating along with her.
2016-12-12 04:13:06 · answer #5 · answered by marianna 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The attraction you speak of is merely the animalistic nature in us coming out.You can see a person and because of how they look or smell etc we would dive right into the sack with them,but would you to spend your life,have kids or build a home with them?never happen.
2006-09-07 04:08:15 · answer #6 · answered by porkupuss 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is insane to have your kids around him. Do you really want an alcoholic and drug addict around you or your kids? His problems shouldn't be made yours or anyone else's. Tell him to check into rehab and leave him. You can find great sex with someone else who is much healthier.
2006-09-07 04:04:11 · answer #7 · answered by spiderspell 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
your really a big fool if you want to be with someone like this.you need to find someone else to make you happy.
there's more to life then sex drugs and things like that.
get out now while you can and tell him,
no change no me.
2006-09-07 04:16:46 · answer #8 · answered by DENISE 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sorry but you better get him out of your house and into a job. and if he loves you he would be helping you. it is not your fault he is in the situation he is in. maybe u better ask the x wife why she got rid of him. it sounds like he is or has had this life for a long long time.
2006-09-07 04:10:18 · answer #9 · answered by emily719 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He's probably not going to change. Go with your heart, and do what feels right.
2006-09-07 04:05:24 · answer #10 · answered by ncnolin 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋