Have just entered into a new relationship with a chap who has smoked for a long time - says about 8/10 oer day. He has health 'issues' and says he will give up as soon as the stresses he is experiencing in his life at the moment have eased up he will be in a stronger frame of mind and be able to cut down/give up.....
2006-09-07 00:33:24 · 25 answers · asked by Susan W 1 in Health ➔ General Health Care ➔ Other - General Health Care
I have begged two of my brothers to give it up for years. The other two gave it up when our father died of cancer.
Well, when the oldest was diagnosed with cancer a few months asgo. He gave it up immediately. Of course, we are waiting for him to die. The chemotherapy was not successful.
The other one still smokes. I guess he will stop when he also gets cancer. Good luck to you.
2006-09-07 00:39:50 · answer #1 · answered by lcmcpa 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When I met my girlfriend now wife, we both smoked 20+ per day.
I stopped smoking 5 years ago but my wife continued...however, since then she has quit. She quit 2 years ago.
I dont know if you can 'get' someone to give up! Being asked to quit tends to make one defensive about the habit in my experience.
Perhaps financial gain is the route to take. For every 20 fags not smoked, put the equivalent £'s in a pot. This pot will soon add up and then MUST be spent by the x-smoker on whatever he/she wants to spend it on. The other obvious gain is health...it takes a long time, but bad health due to smoking DOES reverse. Some issues slowly, others rapidly. The Nicotine addiction takes a relatively short time to pass, sometimes 2 - 3 weeks...this 'cold turkey' stage includes symptoms like hunger pains, headaches, shakes etc.
The hardest part of not smoking is the habitual side, especialy if the person is a 'social' smoker. This of course will be hard next year anyway because of new laws.
Also, in my personal experience again, there is ALWAYS an excuse why it is a bad time to quit...set a date in the future for when the smoking will stop. I set a three month time scale and I convinced myself so much that I wanted to stop over the course of these three months that when the date came, I was hardly smoking at all. Good luck.
2006-09-07 00:48:43 · answer #2 · answered by PollyPocket 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
There's a book called The Easy Way to Stop Smoking by a guy called Allen Car. I know loads of people who have read it and stopped. It talks about how smokers think that smoking will help combat stress but actually it just aggravates it. Might be worth persuading him to give it a try. At the end of the day he's got nothing to lose by reading it.
2006-09-07 00:45:01 · answer #3 · answered by Megano 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Well, he's not ready, and he's not gonna do it. He's been pretty clear with you on that point.
You can help him when he's ready to do it himself. Not a minute before. That's just how people are.
What you can do in the meantime is research what help is available for him when he decides to quit--you can find support groups and smoking cessation programs in your area, and you can present him with information about options like nicotine gum and patches. Don't shove anything in his face, but get the information so that you're ready when he is.
My husband saw a doctor who prescribed him with an antidepressant commonly used to treat addiction, and it helped with the stress as well as the cravings. Your friend may not know that options like that are available to him, so just make it your job to make sure he knows what's out there. And then wait for him to make up his mind. He's the one quitting, not you.
2006-09-07 00:51:02 · answer #4 · answered by smurfette 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
get the book allen carrs easy way to stop smoking try and get him to read it with an open mind and dont nag as he will prob dig his heals in ,this book has cured over 3 million people very boaring book but works main prob is smokers dont get around to reading it they put it off ,the other thing cutting down doesnt help it just makes the problem worse and the reason things are stressful is partly to do with the cigarette smoking doesnt ease stress just releives nicotine pangs which the cigarette creates give it a whirl worth it.
2006-09-07 00:49:39 · answer #5 · answered by goonerno14 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
buy them Alan Carrs Easyway to stop Smoking.
Ask them to read it. Tell them they have nothing to loose. If they are still a smoker at the end then nothing has change. However there is a very good chance that they won't be.
2006-09-07 01:01:53 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I used to smoke and my boyfriend hated it, but the more he went on about it the more he peed me off about it.
I quit in my own time and have, thankfully, stuck to it - almost 5 years now.
We get married in March next year and are both still happy together.
My advice? Don't push it, he will quit when ready.
2006-09-07 00:40:40 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Im in a similar situation, (he smokes abt 20 a day!), i dont think you can make someone give up , i think askking them to cut down or stop makes it worse, he will only do it at his own pace or when he is ready . .
2006-09-07 00:40:32 · answer #8 · answered by ♥ Love Angel Music Baby 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You cant make them stop smoking if they do not want to. However you can tell him that you care for him very much and his health is important to you and that you cannot bear to see him kill himself through smoking.
2006-09-07 00:39:16 · answer #9 · answered by happyflamepepper 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i have the same problem. my boyfriend has smoked for 21 years about 40 a day. im so worried about his health and that im going to lose him one day. ive asked him to quit but he wont. and there no point hounding him as a person really has to WANT to quit to be successful. it sounds like your boyfriend has no intention of quitting he's just making excuses.
2006-09-07 00:45:42 · answer #10 · answered by Caz 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋