Are people who have been outcasted at a young age able to overcome it?

Question

I am try to understand what are some possible effects about outcasts from a pychological view. I personally went to a small new high school and was in a class with 8 people . unfortunately I was the outcast of the group. I didn't really like that particular school and have found it difficult to connect with others after this experience. I am looking for details so I can get a better definition os what being an outcast means.

Answer 1

First, its awfully easy to be an "outcast" when you're the new person in a school of only 8 people!!

Sometimes if a kid is quiet and reserved it is likely he/she won't be in the "in crowd" at school, but if a school has a normal number of students in it (200 or so a class) the quiet, non-in-crowd kid usually finds his/her own close friends and is happy enough. The "in-crowd" is usually made up of a reasonably few kids. If this is what you mean by "outcast" , it usually isn't an issue for a kid who is well adjusted and discovers that high school is not the world.

There are kids, though, who do have difficulty with interpersonal relationships. They may make jokes that nobody else sees as funny. They may be loud or aggressive or not know their place in a crowd. They may be offensive or dramatic or anything else that's just a little over the top. They may be angry or way too shy too. These kids tend to be outcasts wherever they go because there is something about their personality that isn't quite like most people's "in the mainstream". This is harder to overcome because it isn't the kids in the school (who may have tried to be friends but found it was too hard to deal with the person who is different), its the person.

Not being in the in-crowd isn't necessarily being an "outcast". The in-crowd ignores a bunch of non-in-crowd kids and doesn't bother them one way or another. They don't make fun of them either. An "outcast" is someone who has more assertively been excluded from the group. Sometimes outcasts are made fun of, which makes them more of an outcast because they start to hate the others more and more.

Your saying you have trouble connecting with people because of this part experience leads me to wonder if you're someone who takes this a little too seriously and who hangs onto things longer than is appropriate and maybe even needs to feel damaged by people who shouldn't have had the kind of power of you.

The world is full of places where you may just not quite fit in, but then its also full of places where you fit in really well. Its a matter of finding people who are on the same wavelength or have similiar values and aims at you.

I'd say you should ask yourself if you generally like other people or if you generally don't. Ask yourself if you generally like who and what you are or generally don't. If you can generally like people and generally like yourself you shouldn't have any problems connecting with other people if you are in a setting where people are reasonably similiar in values to you. If you don't like people or don't like yourself, that's where you might want to consider talking with a therapist to get past that type of negativity.

Yes. You can overcome having been an outcast, but you may need to get a little help doing that if the problem is more than just eight kids who were already in a school and one who came in later.

I don't know what the psychological effects of having been an outcast are, but I do know that whatever goes on in a high school has nothing whatsoever to do with what you make of the rest of your life and yourself.

Answer 2

I was an outcast when I was young too. I didn't fit in with anyone and people constantly made fun of me. I was extremely shy and people didn't understand me.

To be honest with you, I still carry this "outcast" problem with me, even though, I had therapy for many years.

I am not as shy as I used to be, but I am still very sensitive. For example, when I moved to Israel, people began laughing at the way I spoke Hebrew - my accent, my mistakes with vocabulary and grammar. Perhaps, another person would just have joined in the laughter or not have taken it so seriously, but I got upset about it and felt the people were laughing at me, not laughing with me.

I don't know if you need professional help or not, but if you do, please don't hesitate to get it - there's nothing to be ashamed of and it might really work for you. The best thing is to be able to understand yourself more clearly and then how people react to you. Once you have a better understanding and insight, perhaps you will be able to cope better. There is always hope, ways to change and grow, and you don't have to be stuck with the label or category of "outcast" forever.

Answer 3

Being an outcast just means you are different and that equals unique. I grew up my entire life moving from school to school. I was an outcast up until high school...and I moved and all of the sudden I was popular...and I continued to be through out high school. I guess I finally "blossomed."

I've been out of school for 7 years now, and it bothers me little. Sometimes I think about it, and it makes me sad--maybe a little embarrassed. But that is all part of growing up. Everyone goes through an awkward part of their life where they are a little weird....they're trying to figure out who they are exactly.

When you go to a new school and the class is small, be expected to be outcast. Small schools are not used to newcomers....so they usually reject them. Be friendly, but act as if you don't care if they like you or not and it helps. Don't worry about being traumatized for life unless you are getting beat up everyday or something.

I was made fun of/outcast as a child in school, and I'm a perfectly functional adult, so don't worry. Just keep your chin up, and be proud of every little thing that makes you who you are!

Answer 4

hmmm. i felt outcast from my family. My dad is blakck, my mum is white german, so my siblings are all mixed, so am i except i look white. In fact i recently came back from a two week holiday in cornwall, and apparently i am extreemly tanned.
So whilst most people call me white, and some mixed at the end of the day it means nothing to me cos it's just skin colour, that doesn't make me who i am.
I was also badly bullied at school and raped, it has left me extreemly cautious but i'm reasonably normal. i will always be different and stuggled with most things but you can get round it.
I'm just unique, special. : )

There's really only two routes, mental illness and life, you decide.

Answer 5

it's about finding yourself and going to college help me to overcome years of being a outcast.

Answer 6

It means you may want to learn as an adult the social skills that you couldn't develop at high school.