A friend of mine believes that his marriage failed because they didn't live together beforehand. Now that I think about his answer, it's got me questioning my own opinion on this. My quesiton to you is why do you believe it's better to live together or not before marriage?
2006-09-06 18:38:34 · 11 answers · asked by domijn 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
It's better to live together before marriage, but only after announcing the engagement and setting the date. You use the time together to find out about any blatant incompatibilities before the day and you won't be giving it away just to give it away. Use the time to decide whether to go ahead with the day or to bail out while you can. I recommend a full year engagement. Remember, you're assessing the family that you will be marring into in addition to the person you are engaged to.
2006-09-06 19:05:30 · answer #1 · answered by OU812 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's better. Allowing to see how you operate in a marriage like situation is the best thing you can do to make sure you are compatible-and to even see if marriage is something you want regardless of with whom.
Love is a blinding emotion-like anything that is great and exciting-but gambling that everything will workout fine after saying "I do" is riskier than the riskiest roulette table in Vegas. Why gamble so high if you don't have to!?!?
Also, for those who responded not to because it diminishes the things you should be looking forward to, I can only say this: the joys of marriage shouldn't be based around such lame criteria. Living together is a mundane day-to-day task. Don't over romanticize it!
In life, always do the thing that gives you more information to male an informed decision with. If you follow this you will always come out on top!
Good luck!
2006-09-06 18:55:45 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well,I've lived w/my boyfriend of 2 yrs for the last 3 months. And trust me,things are A LOT different than I had imagined. I've wanted to marry him since the day we met,but living together has challenged our relationship in several ways. Luckily,we've made it through and things are amazing. I couldn't imagine what would have happened if we got married before living together,we'd be at eachother's throats. Think about it,the pressure of living w/someone and being newlyweds. Yikes. Hope this helped :)
2006-09-06 18:43:48 · answer #3 · answered by *Juicy Princess* 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ok from personal experience i don't think it is. It messes up having that feeling of newness after you finally get married to that person. Because part of being married is living together. And if your already living together and doing what people do when they live together what's there to look forward to when you get married and everything. If you don't already know if you could live with someone before getting married then you shouldn't be getting married.
2006-09-06 18:43:54 · answer #4 · answered by coca moe 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You really don't know someone until you have lived together. I will encourage my children to live with their partners before considering marriage. I lived with my hubby for several years before marriage. I have lived with other men in the past without marrying them. I have no regrets.
2006-09-06 18:44:14 · answer #5 · answered by burpolicious 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The only reason would be to get to know each other's "domestic" habits. Clean vs. messy, who would do which chore and still be happy, etc.....but a lot of that could be talked out and by viewing each other living conditions. So just open up and communicate before you make any decision.
2006-09-06 18:44:00 · answer #6 · answered by treasureisland85 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think it's better not to live together before you get married - because then there's no real incentive TO get married. You can just stay living together "commonlaw", forever. Missing out on all the benefits of being married - one of them being motivation for trying harder to get along.
2006-09-06 18:42:54 · answer #7 · answered by lucy_shy8000 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
We lived together before marriage, and I think it helped to some degree.
I think it depends the couple and the communication level they have before doing either.
2006-09-06 18:50:24 · answer #8 · answered by BuffyFromGP 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
na. it does not matter.
what matters is how civilised and self controlled we are. we don want to compromise. y shall we compromise(y not?).
we are well ridden by our desires. men feel something and break their barriers, same are women. and then men call women btches and women call men pgs. we are smartest idiots among all living beings.
basically , we have no control anymore. we can't even control our own senses and desires. its so shameful.
i do apologise for if you did not like my comments. my intensions are not to offend anybody but don't you think what i am saying is right.
2006-09-06 18:47:57 · answer #9 · answered by i don know y 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you got to try out the goods before you buy. marriage is such a big decision to make, so u got 2 do u'r reseach.
2006-09-06 18:44:36 · answer #10 · answered by bella 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋