and I find it kind of annoying. Alot of it has to do with the embarrassment of them following me, but I feel that I'm not acting enough like Jesus. I shouldn't care what other's think for befriending them, but I do. It's a complicated thing.
2006-09-06 17:17:42 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous in Social Science ➔ Sociology
I can definitely relate to what you're talking about. When I was in school, I always took it upon myself to invite outcasts or new kids over to my lunch table. I just thought that everyone deserves company and the opportunity to be heard. Some of them will attach to you after that because they are a little starved for attention, but I always used it as an opportunity to learn about some interesting people and never really cared about what people thought. And now I'm studying psychology in college and planning to become a counselor, so I can continue to give an empathetic ear to those who need it.
But I can definitely trace my desires to do these things back to my own pain and inadequacies. When I was a kid, I moved around so I was the new kid a lot and I admit that I'm a little weird, though not lonely. Perhaps the same is true of you. It sounds to me like you are conflicted between doing a good thing for others and keeping up your social image. I wouldn't presume to tell you which is more important, but hopefully you can find a happy medium.
2006-09-06 17:39:51 · answer #1 · answered by Subconsciousless 7 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Probably the reason these people are lonely is because they are different, but still they crave the friendship that you are offering. Some of them might become your very good friends over time and you will learn a lot from them.
But you cannot be a good friend to them if you are embarassed to be seen with them. You need to have enough confidence in yourself if you go outside what most people do by befriending 'weird' people. Otherwise, don't do it - it's not fair to them or to you.
2006-09-07 00:28:30 · answer #2 · answered by m15 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Your not actually being nice when you think these people are lonely or weird. You are actually doing something out of pitty and pitty is not nice. You might think its a nice thing to do but its not, it actually hurts people a lot more then you may think. If you want to act like Jesus well then read the bible again. Thou shall not judge!
2006-09-07 00:23:32 · answer #3 · answered by steff127 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Don't try to befriend people that you aren't genuinely interested in. How would you feel if someone were friends with you just because it is the right thing to do? I would rather be lonely than have someone be my friend to ease their conscience and be ashamed of me.
2006-09-07 00:24:53 · answer #4 · answered by sweet.pjs1 5 · 3⤊ 0⤋
It's too bad you find it annoying and embarrassing. Know that most people would! Consider this, however: when you find those that don't cling to you, you have found true friends.
2006-09-07 00:26:58 · answer #5 · answered by ? 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
One thing that I have learned is that you can not live your life based on what others think. They will slow your growth and development everytime. Where are you when you meet these people?
2006-09-07 00:29:50 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like deep inside you are lonely and weird as well.
2006-09-07 00:20:09 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
You are confusing them by being nice,especially if you are ashamed because they are nice back to you!! It's not that complicated...either you wanna be nice or you don't.
2006-09-07 01:26:05 · answer #8 · answered by Pattycake 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
..........listen, the fact that you find it embarrassing because their following you around or to be seen with them just tells me that you want be seen as "cool" ......... if that's the case don't hang with them...."cool people" hang with other cool people ...gangstas chill with other gangsta people..etc. if your trying to be "nice" to them and your embarrass to be seen with them in public your being two faceted and just not keeping to real...in that case you should not say nothing to them at all....................no offense but i also think that your somewhat one of those weird and lonely people your trying to be "nice" to.
2006-09-07 00:49:15 · answer #9 · answered by jason w 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Being nice is one thing...but you need to set firm boundaries so they do not interferr into your life. Caring about yourself and setting firm boundaries is the right thing to do. Learn to say "No" firm but politiely.
2006-09-07 00:22:48 · answer #10 · answered by myprofileitsme 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋