we have been together since june 4th and we just clicked like that.. i love him and he loves me.. nobody thinks we should be together and its getting to the point where my parents and his dont want us talking at all.... Should i be able to atleast talk to him? if not see him while parents are there or something? My mama wants me to wait until im 17 thats 2 years i dont know if he will wait that long for me..
2006-09-06 13:07:10 · 18 answers · asked by Amanda 1 in Social Science ➔ Psychology
If he can't wait 2 years for you, then you aren't in love.
2006-09-06 13:11:03 · answer #1 · answered by The Pulverizer 4 · 2⤊ 1⤋
If he "really" loves you then he will wait until you are a little older. You see this way it will make your parents look like they raised a decent, normal girl, and it won't look so bad on them. Ok my wife and I are 6 years apart, and we have been married for 32 years. We got married when she was 16 and nobody thought we stood a chance. I'm here to tell you the truth young lady! If you love each other, then nobody will keep you apart. The problem here is this. If I had it to do over, I would have waited until we got our education, before we got married and started a family of our own. Lack of money is what breaks up most marriages that start real young. You can't live off the fat of the land, can you? Please, don't make the same foolish mistake we made!! Get your education, and put that before you do anything else in your life, because without it you will have nothing, and you will end up breaking up because you won't be able to afford a life you deserve. We made it, but we went to school at night, while the other one worked, and we both got our degrees, and now live comfortable, but It was the hardest thing I have ever done in my life. If I had it to do over, I would still have married the woman that I did, but I would have waited until we were ready for it, or should I say prepared for it. You are not prepared at 15, and YOU need to think long and hard about making the worst mistake of your life. One that could cost you the relationship in the long run because you just couldn't wait a couple of years. Look, I have been there and do it, and if you are that dumb, and want to stay dumb with no money or anything to get started on... then go ahead and make the worst mistake you could possibly make! Good Luck!
2006-09-06 21:15:27 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I don't believe that it's a great age difference. But try to see it their way. They don't want you to get hurt. You are probably still in high school and he's already out (or atleast he should be) and he probably has other ideas of what it means to have fun. I'm not saying he doesn't love you, he probably does, but it won't be long before he starts asking you for sex if he hasn't
already. It's only been 3 months. Your parents are concerned 'cause they want you to finish high school and maybe further your education. They don't want to see you become pregnant 'cause you are extremely young to have a baby and you will lose your freedom to hang out with your friends and have a normal youth. His parents may be concerned 'cause they don't want their son to be accused of abuse. He is 19, meaning he can get in trouble if your parents decide to go to the authorities.
I just say think about it. Your mama is not saying she doesn't want you to have a boyfriend, she is just saying wait 'cause of his age. I know you can't tell your heart who to love and surely you feel very deeply for him. I would say be careful, give more time before you get too serious with him. And this way you guys will get to know eachother more. This will give you guys time to know if you are really meant for each other. And if he really loves you he will wait.
I just turned 31 yesterday and I remember when I was 19 I went out with a guy who was 29 for 9 months and the whole time that I was with him, my mom had an issue with him she kept telling me that she didn't like him for me, that he was too old for me and that I should break up with him. All that time I didn't listen Then she started telling me there was something not right about him. That there was something mysterious about him. Then one day she said "he's married,you better break up with him" I didn't believe her because I asked her to give me proof and tell me where she was getting her information and she wouldn't tell me.
Then one evening a very pregnant woman came to my house asking for me. It was his wife. She came to my house August 5th and she gave birth August 9th. I felt really bad for
her because I didn't know and I didn't mean to hurt her in any way. I still saw him one more week because he kept telling me that he wasn't sure that was his baby and that he wanted to do a DNA test on the baby. He kept asking me to give him some time so that he can leave his wife. Then I realized that he wasn't going to leave his wife and brand new baby that he was just buying time to continue with his games. I wouldn't answer his call when he'd paged me and I wouldn't take his call when he called me at work. He even sent me flowers for my birthday Sept.5th and his wife came to my house yet again after that 'cause she found the receipt for the flower shop. So even though I didn't think anything wrong with seeing this man my mom was able to tell that there was something wrong. So I'm not saying there is anything wrong with your boyfriend, but try to have an open mind about what your mom tells you. Take Care & Goodluck!!!
2006-09-06 20:49:54 · answer #3 · answered by hilda c 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I thought like that when I was 15 (I'm 19 now) I thought I was in love with this guy... turns out that I'm going to marry someone else. I'd say theres nothing wrong with DATING but just loose the love word and replace it with care because seriously when your 5 years older then you'll know what love really means... right now you only care for him. Trust me I thought my mom was lying. I think completely different than I do 4 years ago.
2006-09-06 20:13:33 · answer #4 · answered by ♥ღαмαиdα♥ღ 7 · 2⤊ 1⤋
"nothing wrong with dating, anything deeper, forget it "
If you forget "deeper' as this other has said, you can forget your self respect.
"If he can't wait 2 years for you, then you aren't in love. "
What does the word "wait" mean in this context. Certainly someone was not suggesting they have sex, were they?
"he doesn't love you he wants you in bed "
BS; sex does not negate the possibility for love.
My advice is avoid sex for as long as you do. Think about marriage and human psychology, in other words study, study, study. Use your power to read to the maximum.
Know that no matter the outcome, love is the universal potential in the human soul, when understood in the light if all possibilities of spirit, is the saving grace from which all negative aspects follow positively. Without love as the universal ideal, the guiding light, all other components of human spirit are evil.
The biology for sex is mechanistic and can operate without an active human mind connected to it. I think negating the potential family value because of fear of it would be a grave tragedy. Life is risk
2006-09-06 20:27:10 · answer #5 · answered by Psyengine 7 · 0⤊ 2⤋
If both of you can provide reasonable proof that you really love each other and that neither of you do drugs, alcohol, smoke, and prove to your parents that they can trust you to not have sex or to only have safe sex, depending on how strict your parents are, then yes it should be ok. If you really really want to make it work, you can, but be willing to make some sacrifices becuase you are younger, and your parents are still in charge.
2006-09-06 20:14:02 · answer #6 · answered by DJ 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you are 15 - you don`t even know what love is at this point in your life. there are so many resons. man ! don`t be so freak`en dumb. if he won`t wait now he won`t wait later. besides that once he turns 21 & can go to bars. he`s gone anyway! trust me i`m a guy!
2006-09-06 21:10:45 · answer #7 · answered by Jackiez 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if he loves you which i am sure he does, he won't mind waiting 2 yrs for you .also the reason that everyone wants you to wait is right now if parents want, they can have your boyfriend arrested for statutory rape, which can get him prison time so be patient, your family is only looking out for you.
2006-09-06 20:22:11 · answer #8 · answered by Mark 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He can go to jail how would you feel then he is just infatuated with you try some who will be closer to your age make everyone happy and youll find someone better even though it doesnt seem that way now.
2006-09-06 20:11:15 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It would be better to wait a little, but i think, after few months you could go on , it is just a matter of time .Be patient ,You 'll have a long live belong you , don't worry? everything will be ok.
KISSSSS
2006-09-06 20:18:18 · answer #10 · answered by missvegas 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋