Relationships, I noticed something about them...?

Question

ok married or just in a couple...these days i noticed that people dont put as much attention and effort in their relationship as they used to...instead of trying to communicate or make things work with your spouse/significant other or you cheat or you leave...i talk to people i'm like why didnt you talk to her instead of cheating, they're like " it just happened" or if they just left i ask why and they're like "we're grown apart" or "the spark wasnt there anymore"...i'm like if you want a true and serious relationship you have to put work and effort into it....But the biggest argument i've heard about men/women who cheated is like "if he/she really loved me they would forgive me", my conterargument is "well if you really loved her/him you wouldnt have cheated right?". do you guys notice the same thing? thank you!

Answer 1

Todays society with two wage-earner families wit all the extra stress has brought on a whole new set of family values and morals and problems. Not like the days of old like our older parents and grandparents. With this new stress, comes partners no longer having time for each other or their families so when one feels deprived, they go looking for a new and more exciting partner, but still wants the security of the home base with their original partner, so they blame the "boring" partner for forcing them to look outside their marriage for whats lacking within. Many chaeting partners therefore dont feel that they did anything wrong and feel they should be forgiven because their partner made them do it in the first place. With work and family its a whole lot easier to go out and cheat instead of putting whatever little free time they do have into building their marriages. When the job stress and family responsibilities get to be too much, the wedding vows go out the window, so due to our environment, family values and morals are spiraling downhill out of control with no immediate solution at hand. Your ideas are 100% correct but today are somewhat old fashioned. I agree with you.

Answer 2

I Am Messing Around With A 54 Year Old Married Man And I Am 20 Years Old. I Been Messing Around With Him Since Last September 2005. He Has A Son Who Is 20 And He Is My Friend And A Daughter Who Is 17 And His Daughter Caught Us Having Sex Once Before But She Did Not Say Nothing To Nobody Because She Has Autistic And She Has A Mind Of A 6 Year Old. This Married Man Wants To Leave His Wife And Marry Me... But I Do Not Know If He Will Leave His Wife Of 21 Years! The Sex Is Good And He Always Said I Love You To Me All The Time And I Do Not Know What To Do. But I Love Him! We Never Use Protection But He Pulls Out And Ejaculate On My Stomach! We Have Had Sex In Werid Places!

Answer 3

Yes, I have. The problem is with the internet and vehicles readily available to later generations of people, we tend to think "Well if this doesn't work, I've always got "x number" of people to go to for what I need. In addition, since we have so much more available to us we have more time to do things like hang out with friends, go bowling, etc. What this leads to is that the romantic relationship becomes more of a hassle for many than something that is highly sought after. Thus the reason many younger people look for a quick hook-up, to feed those primal urges that we all have without the commitment aspect coming into play. Comparatively, our parents' generation was much less likely to do the same because they did not have the opportunities or wide range of social events that we do. What it really comes down to is this...
Most people in Generation X and Y, live a fast paced life that demands only the shortest of attention spans due to the ever changing situations that go on around us. What that leads to is people who want something now that they desire. Once that desire has been fulfilled, they seek excitement or diversity elsewhere. There are advantanges and disadvantages to every culture and every generation within that culture, but my feeling is that our lifestyle is becoming too impersonal because we never allow ourselves to be intimate enough with one another. I guess you could say that with all the communication technology we have today, it is rather ironic that we have distanced ourselves more with the people we should be closer to. Well hopefully this thoroughly answered what you were looking for. And to reiterate what I stated before, I do agree with your assessment and feel exactly the way you do. Maybe there is happiness in store for us great observers. :)

Answer 4

That's exactly what i've been saying too now days instead of working marriages out people just want to cheat or do stupid **** like swinging instead of people doing all these things they need to work things out people have to understand this too in a marriage if you don't do your duties as a husband or wife or show the person love and affection they could be pushed into someone else's arms and men don't want dirty women they should know to clean and take care of their kids and women don't want lazy men they want a man with a job to take the responsibility of taking care of her and the kids and cheating just doesn't "happen" someone always between causes it by cheating, no affection, are not being ready to be committed into marriage before people get married they should know what their doing like responsibilities they will have and always remember to not let the flame go out you have to work on your marriage keep the sparks flying marriage can work of two are willing i'm 22 i've been married for 4 years my husband is 24 we both accepted our choice to get married young and understand our responsibilties I am a stay at home mom and wife he works his butt off while he works I take care of our kids,clean,cook, and do chores when he's off work he helps me I love him and he loves me ANYONE not willing to work on a marriage or a person that cheats didn't have what it takes in the 1st place before people get married they need to understand being committed and having duties as a husband and wife if people can't accept things in marriage and the commitment they have no right getting married!!!!

Answer 5

In alot of cases yes I agree, with the younger generation growing up with easier options in everything they do in life people do not seem to learn about perserverance anymore. People seem to be taking the easy option out of everything instead of putting a little effort in. I think people should be taught to tough things out and learn better communication skills problem solving skills while they are young.

Answer 6

Yeah, it's the same thing. I think it's just everything is acceptable these days in society. What's the point of trying to raise a family if you don't think there's a big chance you'll stay together? But I think people will eventually grow tired of the lifestyle and go back to the old days.

Answer 7

I totaly agree with you - i've noticed the same thing. it seems in this day and age divorce is the easiest way to 'solve' a problem. when i real life that could just be hurting what a couple used to have. I main reason i've noticed cheating (hate to say it) is men who think the sex wasn't good enough anymore.
your last statment was also very true.

Answer 8

Most of the time, there is more to it than simple cheating or loss of interest...there is money! Money breaks up people more often than not. It's hard to say I love you to someone who has ruined your chances to ever get a car, house, or loan. Most people talk about counciling, but that's expensive and very few insurance plans cover it.

Answer 9

lol, yea I have pronounced this, its no longer continually the case, yet yea you're precise lol. humorous. earlier every person complains about my answer, i'm the made from an interracial courting, my dad change right into a good-looking black guy, and the mum change into an unattractive white lady. in reality she jogged my memory of Olive from on the buses lol. She even had the glasses lol strong question, looking ahead to studying the solutions lol

Answer 10

Yes, I notice it all the time. Thank you for putting it right in front of our faces. It's nice to see it in print.