my name is nada ihave 17 years he is 40 we spent alot of happy time with each other inschool trips until he told me that he loves me but he is unhappy married man so istand beside him to behappy one but after ifinished my high school and transfer to university he forget me he didn,t call me pr answer on my calling itried to forget him or have adate with another one or be engaged toany one because ifeel that iam unfaithful to my lover how can iforget him?how can icontine my life iam now 19 years how iforget 2years ispent with him NB:we didnot have asex with each other because iwant tobe avirgin till marriage help me pleeeeeeeeeeease
2006-09-06 11:50:19 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Hi Nada!
A rough road for you. Some people here are responding without reading what you have written. So they are saying things about you and your teacher which may not feel good.
First, I compliment you on your good choices. By not entering into a sexual relationship with your teacher, you have avoided certain sexual scars.
Second, I am glad you have decided to be a virgin on your wedding day. My wife and I were virgins [in 1984] and I have no regrets about waiting [we were 23 years old]. We have been married more than 22 years!
It will be helpful for you to not refer to your teacher as your "lover." The term "lover" implies there is a sexual relationship between the two people. If you never had sexual intercourse with him, then he is not your lover.
I know that what you think between you was love, but most likely it was a combination of dependence [your teacher] and adolescent infatuation [you].
He was inappropriate in pursuing a relationship other than the teacher-student relationship. I can absolutely believe he is unhappy in his marriage, and perhaps told you how lonely he was. These feelings of his were most likely true ones, but he should not have sought solace for his unhappiness and lonliness from a minor.
It sounds like he maintained a two year relationship with you based on this pretext of love, and then dropped you the moment you went away to school. That hurts. The end result is not a lost love but a feeling of being used if he could so casually end your relationship. Most likely he has moved on to his next "student relationship."
I suggest two things, and I hope you will heed my advice.
First, please contact the Principal at the school you attended and tell her/him everything about the relationship you have partially described here. Although your teacher may not have pursued a sexual relationship with you, his next "student relationship" may result in his coercing a young teen to have sex with him, or worse - he may rape her.
Second, let him go. He was not meant for you, and you were not meant for him. Concentrate on your studies in college, and let your horomones lead you to men your own age. There is probably a counselor available to you either through Student Services, or through your parent's healthcare.
I wish you well. This will not be easy. You can do what is right to keep him from victimizing a young woman. Be strong!
2006-09-06 12:21:25 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I hope he loses everything. How could he even do this? he is in the wrong.. he will go to jail for you and him doing anything.. You just think you love him, and he only wants you for sex. The cops will find him and he and you will both be in trouble.. you have a life to live, and find a younger man girl!!!
2006-09-06 18:53:25 · answer #2 · answered by sshhmmee2000 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
that's stupid. if he cheats on his wife with you what makes you think he wont do it to you with someone younger than you. he is a perverted old man and should lose his job and go to jail for it. you need to grow up get a life and find someone your own age. think about what happened to other teachers that have done the same thing.
2006-09-06 19:05:38 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nothing could happen between someone of 17 and someone of 40 years.
2006-09-06 18:52:44 · answer #4 · answered by Yepe 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This man is NO man but a RAT. Go on with your life and enjoy the young years while you can with young men.
2006-09-06 18:56:58 · answer #5 · answered by south_lido 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sweetie, if you never slept with him, let alone spent time with outside of school, he was never your lover. And no matter what he told you, he never loved you. He is a sick man who tries to get his jolly's off with young girls.
Move on and forget him.
2006-09-06 18:55:44 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Move on with your life. You should never have had a relationship with him in the first place.
2006-09-06 18:54:56 · answer #7 · answered by S.A.M. Gunner 7212 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He's playing you for a fool, because he knows you're gullible. If he was really unhappy and/or really interested... he'd already have filed for divorce. Plus, if he cheats on his wife, he'd cheat on you too!
Don't let him break you down.
2006-09-06 18:53:49 · answer #8 · answered by ♫☼♥ ≈ Debbi ≈ ♥☼♫ 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I would say to forget him, if he really loved you he would have got in touch. as for him loving one of his students, that is not right he is there to teach you not lay you . after all you did not have sex that was by your choice not his I am sure, think about it.
2006-09-06 19:01:49 · answer #9 · answered by ? 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
get over it, move on with your life!!
He was a dirty old man, whatever way you look at it, he shouldn't have been involved with one of his students.
He has obviously moved on, you need to as well.
I'd consider reporting him, he may make a habit of doing this Do you want that on your conscience?
2006-09-06 18:55:33 · answer #10 · answered by Levi 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋