she broke up with her fiance after they lost the baby . i am sixteen and i am pregnant .. she treats me badly . & saying im going to be a bad mother being so young me and my boyfriend attend parenting classes 2 times a week she still seems to be bitter . and says she going to call my child " mommas little mistake " im not sure if she is upset because she lost her baby but shes making it harder on me . i get enough from my peers then having to come home and listen to her .
2006-09-06 09:19:02 · 18 answers · asked by WorshipMeKthx 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
she is definately lashing out at her own loss. there is nothing like the expectation in relation to a baby, and nothing like its loss. you see it all across nature. heck, everytime my wife is pregnant (twice) i see the jeolusy in her sisters eyes, but they arent even trying to have kids.
having a kid isnt an easy thing though. i am proud that you are stepping up to the plate and taking classes. if you see and feel your sister is going to be awful around you and your kid, then you will have to resolve that with her or distance yourself, you DONT need stress right now... i am sure you have enough
contact me anytime if you need someone to talk to! God bless
2006-09-06 09:24:01 · answer #1 · answered by xrionx 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yep, sounds like a mistake for you would have been a miracle for her. Losing a baby, especially a baby that is wanted, is extremely difficult and emotionally draining. You already said she broke up with her boyfriend. This happens alot because one person blames the other for the problems. Chances are once you have your baby and she realizes how much you love him or her she will calm down. Right now, she's having a hard time accepting that you can have a baby when you wernt even trying, and she loses the baby that she wants more than anything in the world. It sounds like you will be a fine mother, you are taking classes and your boyfriend is involved. Keep up the good work and try to get her involved, as hard as it may be. Let her know how you feel, and tell her how sorry you are that she lost her baby. When she has stopped hurting so bad, she will come around and realize how unfair she is being to you. Best of luck to you.
2006-09-06 09:26:06 · answer #2 · answered by manderstwin1 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like your sister is still upset about losing her baby and taking it out on you. She is probably bitter and jealous. Try not to listen to her. She should seek counseling because losing a baby is very difficult.
I think it's great that you and your boyfriend are attending parenting classes. That's a wonderful way to prepare for a baby. Having a baby is hard, especially so young (I was 18), but you will love that baby more than anything in the world, and it will get easier. Try to stay in school if at all possible and stay positive. I hope your boyfriend stays with you, too. Don't listen to your sister, she has issues that need professional help.
Congratulations on your baby!
2006-09-06 09:27:42 · answer #3 · answered by tinydoozer 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like you will need to do your best to keep her away from your child. She may be upset about the loss of her own child and taking it out on you, but that is no excuse for her behavior. She needs professional help (therapy).
For now, just ignore her. But, after the baby comes, you will need to protect the child from her. How you do this is up to you. Try talking to your parents and see what they say about her behavior. If they will not take steps to help you protect your child, you might want to think about moving out. There are agencies that can help you. In most states, when you become a mother, you also become a legal adult. Start with the department of social services. They should be able to show you some options.
Good Luck.
2006-09-06 09:25:32 · answer #4 · answered by Gypsy Girl 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think your sister is still grieving for the loss of her baby. I am sorry she seems to be dealing negatively with it towards you. It is good you are taking parenting seriously. It is a hard job at any age but especially when you are so young. Mys on and his wife had their first baby at 16.. they married later... They have made 11 years together but it was not easy... Life can get tough sometimes but if you are stubborn enough.. you make it thru to the good times and those are the things you hold onto to get thru the next tough time....
Is your mother or father supportive of you and the pregnancy? Maybe you could explain to them how much your sisters unkind words are hurting you and they could intervene. It would be good for your sister to have some grief counseling to be able to get past this horrible loss....She needs to be able to find happiness for herself.. She may even feel like it is her fault that she lost the baby.. and needs some help not blaming herself.
If you are strong enough, tell your sister yourself how these comments hurt you.... Don;t say them in an accusatory way but to explain how you feel ... Make sure to acknowledge her loss... maybe she feels like your pregnacy is rubbing her loss in her face...so it would be good for you both to acknowledge the good and bad things you have been thru.. I wish you luck and lots of love from your family... Babies are a blessing!
2006-09-06 09:31:07 · answer #5 · answered by wedswd D 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
WOW---tough situation. Hang in there though. Sounds like you are doing all you can to be a good parent and have a healthy pregnancy. Try to keep your stress down. Your sister is probably going through a really hard time too right now. She lost her baby and the man she loves (or loved). I think she needs some counseling of her own right now. Try to blow it off---you can only do the best you can. Keep your chin up!
2006-09-06 09:23:16 · answer #6 · answered by missionhtg 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Her heart is broken, and seeing you reminds her of this. And it's not just you, she probably hates everyone that is pregnant.
I know that when we have young people come in to deliver with parents who are obviously not happy about the baby, things tend to change when they see the baby. Sometimes the actual baby isn't as painful as the idea of the baby was.
Be supportive to your sister. She's suffering a pain that you will hopefully never have to feel. To lose a baby is to lose a dream, and that's a hard thing to let go of.
2006-09-06 11:10:57 · answer #7 · answered by trivial 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
she would be in a position to be ok. Her hormones at the instant are raging and could be for the subsequent a number of months. No therapy will substitute that. even with the actuality that therapists ought to take credit for assisting even with the actuality that that's a organic progression to a good existence after a number of months ( so she could be greater appropriate besides). comprehend despite she desires to do now yet attempt to tell her that on your babys funeral you comprehend she might prefer to be at her perfect. which ability she has to eat so as to have the potential. concentration on Friday to get her going. tell her that staying in mattress ought to reason thromboembolism ( blood clots in her legs) with the aid of coagulation variations that take place in being pregnant and it could be no longer good if she ignored the funeral with the aid of that. In different words merely concentration on particular issues because precise now thats all she would be in a position to deal with. while she is waiting, help her comprehend that have been that toddler to stay to tell the tale, being so untimely, that there could be massive issues in a while in neurological progression. Natures way is right. i'm sorry for you
2016-09-30 09:59:39 · answer #8 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
wow, she's kinda immature for a 23 year old. If I were you , I wouldn't look to her for support for in your pregnancy that much. Consider her loss as a feeling of jealousy. Good luck, and over all, give her understanding, and be glad it wasn't you that lost the baby. You'll also be the "bigger" sister.
2006-09-06 09:56:22 · answer #9 · answered by Suzy Suzee Sue 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Thats bad news for your sis and great news for you. It might be that your sister hasn't fully come to terms with her loss and is taking it out on you.
Bear with her for a bit but be mindfull of your own health. If it goes on for to long, don't be afraid to tell her she is upsetting you.
You need to stay well for you and your baby. Be strong
2006-09-06 09:27:04 · answer #10 · answered by zozbabez 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋